Champagne
by Miss. Miyazawa
Summary: Hatsuharu wakes up after a night of binge drinking with a blonde in his bed. He contemplates their unlikely relationship, and the uncertain future. Haru x Uo.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

* * *

It was everywhere.

Thousands of white-gold fibers fell over Hatsuharu's brow like a continuous stream of champagne, bottled to its breaking point after a vigorous shake, then released in fit of ecstasy. Breathing in deeply, he could swear he almost caught the scent of champagne: sweet and crisp but with a sharp bite that only alcohol could provide.

A never ending supply of equilibrium distorted, inhibitions torn down…

Sliding his groggy storm cloud eyes around the room slowly, he saw evidence of last night's alcohol-soaked escapades. Bottles of expensive French wines were thrown together in a multicultural heap with several choice Japanese rice liquors. The nearly empty bottles caught the morning sun that was coming over the horizon, glinting and taunting his dry eyes. In another corner, he spotted the result of all of the liquor swimming through both of their bloodstreams: clothes in a haphazard cyclone. Tight black pants, a fur-trimmed motorcycle jacket, a long pleated uniform skirt that could only belong to her.

This view was covered in the streams of champagne that tickled his nose. Those golden strands ignited with the sunlight, glowing until it almost hurt to look for too long.

Carefully so as not to wake her, Hatsuharu reached a hand up to brush away that stubborn champagne so that he could see more clearly. At least he hoped it would give him more clarity.

No such luck. A headache was cracking his head wide open, a dull ache that started between his eyes and quickly spread.

He was too nervous to move but he couldn't help it. All of that liquor gave him the strong urge to go to the bathroom. Plus he needed to cure his headache, and only a healthy dose of aspirin would do the job (luckily, Hatori had supplied him with a fresh bottle not too long ago, during his routine annual checkup).

Slowly, slowly, he made his way onto his feet. First, he had to cautiously maneuver his slender arm from underneath her head. That part took the longest (and was the most terrifying) since her warmth bled onto his arm all night. He knew that this part of him would be the first thing she would notice if she woke up in that particular moment. Hatsuharu missed the pressure of her head almost immediately after his arm was declared free from her grip. Nevertheless, he breathed a silent breath of relief as he gingerly maneuvered his body upright. The most she reacted was a sleepy groan and a restless toss and turn that didn't last long once she occupied the toasty spot where his body used to be.

Hatsuharu paused a moment to look at her. Now her intoxicating hair was cascading over her face so that her features were barely recognizable. A smile splashed onto his lips as his eyes melted into pools over her sleeping form. He quickly located his white and blue striped boxers, crumpled in a heap by his feet, and pulled them on.

A long journey to the bathroom later, his feet padded softly against the cold floor towards the bed. His messy-haired companion hadn't missed a beat in her alcohol-soaked slumber. It brought a low chuckle to his throat that he didn't suppress in time.

Eyes blinked slowly open. They were sapphires thrown in the dark depths of the roughest seas.

"Urnghhhh. My head is killing me," Uo announced with her usual rough Yankee coarseness. Everything she said almost sounded like a threat was following closely behind her statements (unless she was speaking to Tohru or Hana, of course). This was especially true with her voice clogged with sleep. She blinked, licked her dry lips, and finally met his gaze. Her eyes were a reflection of his own: the same tired, dazed expression, the same red veins from lack of sleep and excess of liquor claiming them.

"I figured you'd say that," Hatsuharu replied calmly, with an undercurrent of grogginess. This was a major hangover he was fighting through. It was like trying to swim against the flow of an icy stream. "Take these," he offered, pouring two white capsules into her palm.

Uo quickly took the offered remedy without a drop of water to help the pills down on their journey down her throat. In response, the blonde gagged and coughed, managing to spit out a few scrambled-sounding expletives. Quickly, Hatsuharu offered a bottle of spring water, which Uo snatched greedily. She sucked down the liquid in large gulps, giving Hatsuharu a glare that could freeze Hell over. The white-haired boy shrugged in response.

"Fuck!" she gasped as soon as the contents of the plastic bottle were deposited in her stomach. Some water trickled down her chin, and droplets soon collected on her long flaxen tresses. Uo casted her ocean-colored eyes, still rough and choppy from last night's calamity, over the pile of glinting alcohol bottles.

"We didn't drink _**all**_ of those, did we? I didn't know I was such a lush."

"Not necessarily. I'm sure you did the most damage though."

"Oh, God." Uo stopped her shocked exploration to clutch her head in pain. Eyes squeezed shut, her mouth tumbled into a graceless grimace. "This headache won't go away. I know better than to mix my liquors. Fuck." True to her word, Hatsuharu discovered a trail of silver beer cans that were just barely seen underneath the cyclone of clothes.

His arms framed Uo's long frame, which was now crumpled into a hungover-ravaged heap. Hatsuharu came in close, foreheads barely brushing together. The closeness of his body, the heat radiating from him forced her gaze to meet his.

Uo pulled the free flowing white blankets around her body as if it just occurred to her now to be modest in the daylight. Not that it made a difference. Her body was imprinted on his mind no matter what was covering her form. Unconsciously, his eyes flickered down to her collarbone, which still jutted forth despite her covering.

Why was the female collarbone such a sensual body part? It was delicate yet strong, soft yet covered in edges. Its shadows and depth, light mixed with dark, called to him. _Kiss me_ , the angles and edges seemed to tease.

With a groan, he greedily pressed his hot lips against the hollow of her collarbone. He wanted to taste her skin, suck in all of her scent, feel her body heat in the here and now. Hatsuharu wanted to savor those textures and tastes to last him until later.

Who knew when that would happen. Of course, Hatsuharu and Uo had slept together several times when both of them were fully aware and alert, not a drop of alcohol in their systems. However, their encounters seemed to happen at a moment's notice, never with any rhyme or reason. As far as Hatsuharu was concerned, he was single and fine with it. Uo was the same way. She was independent. Rough and tomboyish, Uo didn't seem to be the settling down type anyway. It suited Hatsuharu just fine.

At first.

With a sigh, Uo threw her head back, eyes closed tightly as if the world depended on it. It only exposed more delicious collarbone and throat for him to devour. It suited him just fine.

Hatsuharu felt his view becoming more tunnel-like and hazy. His soft gray eyes hardened into steel. He was no longer calm and stoic. He didn't feel quite like himself. It was more like an animal was taking over that he knew and was unfamiliar with all at once.

Black Haru.

Oddly enough, White Haru didn't feel himself retreat down into the crevices of his soul while Black took over. Rather, it was as if he was viewing Black Haru from above his physical body. Most times, when he changed, a piece of him would be knocked unconscious while his Black persona created chaos. It was so strange, as if his two identities were wordlessly communicating with each other to achieve the same end.

He spread feathery kisses all over her firm yet tender collarbones, which rained down more firmly and passionately with time. His hands pierced Uo's wrists, so thin and fragile, to the headboard. He noticed the fold in her brow from his tight grip, but he couldn't bring himself to ease up. He would devour her until there was no more of her left.

He needn't have worried however, because the pain and pleasure formed a hazy cocktail over her face that encouraged him to fan his kisses all over her milky throat.

"H…Haru," Uo wheezed, the breath ripped out of her body with the contact of sharp molars on her neck. He drank in her skin, mouth moving and sucking in the silky skin as if he could slowly consume her soul through the sensitive spot.

"I need you, Arisa," Black Haru bit out, with a furious snap at her neck once again with his teeth. Was he hurting her? He perversely hoped so. She was hurting him so much, every day…

He felt her shudder with the way he growled her name. He rolled every bit of desire, delirium, and anger, this dangerous mixed drink of emotions, into those three syllables. He knew she loved every minute of it. In return, he relished every moan that he ripped from her vocal chords with the ecstasy-laced pain he gave her.

She was so bad.

"We gotta stop," she managed to choke out between panting and groaning. "I'm going to scream."

Silver clashed with stormy blue once again. Her eyelids were heavily hooded, revealing only tiny slits of ocean blue. The view of her face awash with passion was enough to make him groan.

"Scream," Black Haru taunted with a devilish grin stretching his swollen lips wide. His eyes ignited with her threat.

"I… We… We—we can't." Her decisiveness swirled with an enormous amount of doubt and longing. He could feel it in her voice. Uo reached her hands up to roughly push him away. Almost immediately, he could tell that she was letting her champagne hair wash over her face again to hide the regret in her eyes.

"We should stop," she said in a small voice, strangled and hoarse. Her hair still concealed her face. He knew if he brushed it back to see her, she'd damn near bite his hand off, so he backed off.

Blink.

Blink.

Blink.

Black Haru was quickly receding. It felt as if he were in a bathtub filled with warm water that was quickly being sucked down the drain. White Haru no longer had the backseat. He was free to reign over one-hundred percent. He blinked once more to scatter that intoxicating haze that descended upon him just now. Even in this moment, he could feel Black Haru cursing violently in the edges of his mind. However, he knew that his darker side would settle down for now.

Gently, Hatsuharu grasped her chin and pulled it from her blonde curtain. Her face was pale. Her eyes were wild. Her hair was a tornado. He was sure he looked no different. It was a struggle to push those animalistic urges down, but he tried to suppress himself for her sake. As tough and slick as Uo was, he knew she was vulnerable and soft deep down inside.

 _Deep down inside. I'm sure you both like it that way_ , Black Haru tittered lasciviously from the edges of his mind. Faintly now, but still noticeable enough to tick White Haru off. With an internal growl, he felt Black slither away completely for good. For now at least.

His thumb tenderly stroked her lower lip, now at least twice its normal size from all of the biting and kissing last night. He noticed faint bite marks and a drop of dried blood dotting her lip. He caressed the injury, silently cursing himself out. He gritted his teeth in half-disgust.

He recoiled when she shrank from his touch. Especially when she was so responsive before. But her eyes flashed dangerous electric cobalt when she glared up at him through long dark eyelashes.

"I'm going to go," Uo growled.

Stupidly, Hatsuharu asked, "Why?" before he could stop himself. _What do you mean, why?_ he asked himself in bewilderment. _I crossed the line. I acted out of line._

Uo gave him a queer look, as if they were on the same wavelength in regards to his floundering question. It was almost crazy how they read each other's thoughts without a single word exchanged.

Even though a nasty retort seemed to bubble up on the surface of her lips, she swallowed it down instead with a grimace and a small shake of her head. "We're both still probably fucking wasted," she settled on weakly. "I'm going to get cleaned up. I probably look like a hot mess. Then I want to get out."

"Arisa…"

"I need to leave now. This was just all a big mistake."

A big mistake? His stomach felt like it was wringing itself inside out with her harsh words. His heart galloped at high speed. How could this all be a big mistake?

Wordlessly but with her body language saying a thousand words, she stalked over to the heap of clothing and yanked on her clothes, piece by piece. Hatsuharu couldn't help but stare at her wistfully as she wrestled herself into her school uniform. When she flung her hair over her shoulder, a sweet cloud wafted over to him. He couldn't place the scent, but he wanted that scent to drift over him always.

"You owe me an explanation. You can't just say that this is all a big mistake and then not tell me why," he said as calmly as possible.

"Don't play dumb," Uo spat irritably as she brushed invisible debris from her uniform and stopped to search for her handbag. "We've been fucking around for three months now for no apparent reason. Just wasting time. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of lying to Tohru and everyone. I'm tired of pretending I barely know you just so we can continue this charade. This means nothing to me. I'm done. I'm really done."

"Wait."

Fingers wrapped around her wrist again, gently and softly.

"Let go."

"…No."

"I said let go!"

"How can I let go when you won't let me go first?!" he shrieked wildly. Self-consciously, he lowered his tone.

"You're not making any sense. This is me letting you go, Haru. I'm not in love with you. I never was. And I know you don't love me too. We don't even like each other. This is just us using each other to get off. That's it, and you know it."

Each syllable felt as if it physically resurrected itself and gave Hatsuharu a cold, unyielding slap of reality. Only this reality felt like some distorted fantasy. All he knew was that this was Uo's perspective. But he refused to accept it as reality.

"There's no way," Hatsuharu breathed, pulling Uo in so close that their body heat melted together, "I'm letting you go like this."

Tears bubbled in Uo's eyes, but she furiously brushed them away. An angry flush tinged with embarrassment bloomed in her cheeks. She whipped her hair quickly to blur the sight, but Hatsuharu's eyes were quicker.

He only saw her.

He realized he was still gripping her wrist, but it was a firmer grasp this time. Uo made no moves to pull herself away. He took advantage of the moment.

It was true, in the beginning it was all fun and games. They didn't take each other seriously. One game of truth or dare, one drunken night, one intoxicated kiss. That was all it took.

Hatsuharu couldn't deny that he was attracted to the tall blonde. She was rough and jagged with edges poking out haphazardly. As joking and breezy she seemed, she was also extremely closed off, especially with tender and sensitive matters of the heart. It took so much time to break through her scar tissue, to touch upon those still-fresh wounds. Gradually, she let him in. She let him see glimpses of moments that made her cry, that made her vulnerable and lonely. She was tough and cool and confident, but there was more behind the curtain.

He was able to uncover more and more as she grew more confident in him. He wished he could say the same for himself. He had so many mysteries and secrets that he wanted to hold onto tight. He couldn't let them wash against the surface. It was all too painful to reveal, too risky.

But he couldn't help feeling like he could smile more easily around her. His heart felt lighter. It was hard to contain his grin around her. If anyone else caught on about them… But they were such experts on keeping secrets that it never was even a thought on any of their minds.

He felt his hands cup her face. He tilted her face up. Her eyes turned into pools again, no longer choppy ocean currents.

"There's only one problem with what you just said," Hatsuharu murmured.

"…And what's that?" Uo's eyes darted away. _Trying to be secretive again_ , he mused.

With a strength that surprised him, he yanked her face towards him again. His heart hammered against his rib cage. He felt drops of perspiration gather on his brow. But through the constant blood rushing in his ears, he persisted.

"I'm in love with you."

Uo shook her head slowly, a wavy smile trembling on her lips. When she saw how serious he was, her eyes wide with disbelief turned sad. She took a shuddering breath.

Hatsuharu's lips collided with her own, soft and needing, then firm and passionate with time. Before he could deepen the kiss, she growled against his lips and pulled back. The vibration of that low grumbling sound sent tremors through every cell of his body. He tried to curb the wanting in his veins.

The imprint of her kiss was still on his lips. Unknowingly, his pink tongue slid against his bottom lip. He tasted her natural mouth mingled with sweet, tingly champagne.

Champagne. She was his champagne. He needed more and more of her every time. He couldn't seem to build an immunity to her. Hatsuharu felt like he could get intoxicated off of her essence.

"Fuck," he muttered under his breath. Uo acted as if she hadn't heard him.

"…I'm sorry, Haru," Uo murmured, unable to meet his gaze. The curtain fell once more. Dividing him from her. Keeping him from her true feelings. He could only rely on her tone, on the cadence of her voice, on the weight of her words. "This isn't going to work out."

"What isn't going to work out?"

"Don't play dumb! I hate when you do that!" she thundered with a bolt of menace in her voice. "Time's up. I'm not having fun anymore. I'm done playing with you."

"Playing with me? Playing with me?!"

"That's right. I'm done playing with you. It was fun in the beginning. But now I'm bored. And I'm not in love with you. I don't love you."

"I think you're bullshitting me."

"Doesn't matter what you think."

"Arisa."

"Haru."

Silence washed between them, soaking them both in its icy waves. Gray and blue clashed in the perfect storm. Haru was thunder, while Uo was lightning.

"I think you're lying to me, Arisa."

Uo ducked her head down once again.

"You can live in your fantasy. It's not my problem anymore."

Soft footsteps turned into more insistent tapping against the floor. He heard her move towards the door.

A pause…

He felt her eyes on him.

A hesitation trembled in the air. If he concentrated hard enough, he could almost hear her mouth opening to say something. The pause made the air vibrate against his back. His hands balled into fists. He looked out the window. It would hurt too much to look at her.

The cool click of the closing door reverberated through the empty space.

Hatsuharu squinted against the golden sunlight. It stung his eyes to stare into it. But his heart was hurting more than any hangover, more than any headache, more than even this brief stinging of his eyes.

His mind drifted back to the sight of the world being bathed in sunlight through the view of Uo's haphazard hair splashed over his eyes.

A sad smile touched his lips.

He was missing that champagne.

Sweet with a tinge of acid.

Golden and bittersweet.


	2. Chapter 2

Geez… It's been a while. I'm terrible at updating. Sorry about that. Been busy adulting and procrastinating haha. I originally intended for this to be a one-shot, but I wanted to continue on with this story. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket in any size, shape or form.

* * *

The sun melted over all of the contents of the simply furnished room. Even though the honeyed light reached through every corner as the sun sank in the horizon, Hatsuharu felt dark and cold. Sitting by the window of their love den—or former love den, if he could be completely honest—felt strange and new without her by his side.

The bottle of champagne before him caught the honeysuckle light and shimmered. A drop of condensation slid down the slick glass surface. There was a considerable amount of alcohol in the bottle left despite his bender shortly after she left. He had to fill that gaping hole that she metaphorically but still painfully punched through his body with something, anything. The closest and most convenient distraction, unfortunately, also happened to be the alcohol that reminded him of her the most.

"Perhaps God is punishing me," he said aloud as he watched the still surface of the liquor. No doubt it was flat, or mostly flat anyway. Uo refused to drink champagne if it was even the tiniest bit flat. Hatsuharu was way less selective about his choice of spirits, especially when it came to a broken heart.

As helpless and pathetic as he felt in that moment, drinking the day away, he couldn't help it. He uncorked the bottle and took a large gulp. His suspicions were right. The flat, bland taste of the champagne bit his tongue.

Hatsuharu looked over at the city landscape. The cars and people below were so busy. Frantically running here and there. They looked like a colony of confused fire ants.

How strange they all seemed. How pathetic.

 _I think you mean to describe yourself,_ he told himself with a sardonic grin.

A white carton wrapped in plastic caught his eye next. He shifted over to the nightstand and picked up the package of cigarettes as gently as if he were holding an egg. The cigarettes were a leftover from last night. Uo liked to smoke when she was drunk.

 _And even when she's sober_ , he mused. His eyes turned smoky as a wintry night came into view…

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

"Come back here!"

Hatsuharu and Kyo had been quarrelling again, and this time the punk took it too far. Kyo had taken off with a sharp, smart ass retort of some idiotic nature. Hatsuharu had had enough of Kyo's arrogance and anger. Just because Tohru wasn't giving Kyo any wasn't any reason for him to get so pissy at Hatsuharu. (This wasn't the issue of course, but bottom line: Kyo's pent up romantic feelings for Tohru were making him a total bitch.) Hatsuharu always considered himself a pretty calm guy, but tonight was a touchy night for him. Kyo wasn't making it any easier either.

Everything was so mellow at first. Tohru invited her girlfriends plus Hatsuharu and Momiji over for a game of Rich Man Poor Man and a hearty dinner. It was a pretty great night full of laughter, delicious food, and harmless teasing. (Uo really got under Kyo's skin, which made Hatsuharu even happier that Tohru's best friends came).

But then Kyo threw a tantrum during the card game, like always. He accused Hatsuharu of all people of cheating. Cheating!

They got into an argument that almost turned into a fist fight. The events of what happened next were a very hazy in his mind. Next thing he knew, Kyo shouted a string of obscenities and ran away like a baby.

"Argh!" Hatsuharu cried out in frustration. His breath came in short, shallow gasps. The puffs of air disappeared as easily as they came in the frosty winter night air. Snow started to fall as his eyes scanned Shigure's property. No sign of the orange-haired brat.

"Come out and fight me like a man, you damn C—"

His wild eyes found a shadowy figure instead of Kyo, which made the "Cat" that was about to roll so easily off of his tongue freeze on it instead.

The lighter igniting to life was what he saw first. Burning orange in a sea of darkness. The orange flame devoured the tip of the long white cigarette perched between her fingers. The person's tall frame and long blonde hair were dead giveaways her identity, even though her hair concealed her profile.

Uotani Arisa.

Hatsuharu hesitated while Uo simply took a long drag as if he wasn't even there. The plume of dark gray smoke nearly matched his frosty breath. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to approach her. He barely knew her after all. They ran in the same social circles of course, via Tohru. But he had never been alone to have a conversation with her before. He just categorized her neatly as "Tohru's Yankee Friend" in the archives of his memory. Simply put. No need for further examination.

To be fair, she hadn't taken the time to get to know him either. So perhaps he could sneak away, pretend he didn't see her? He disliked small talk and it looked like she wanted to be alone.

Instead, for some odd reason, the following sentence burst forth:

"Didn't you tell Tohru-kun you quit smoking?"

He was surprised the statement just tumbled out of his lips. He wasn't even one-hundred percent sure that it was true. Hatsuharu did remember Tohru smiling at Uo earlier as he was going to the bathroom. The two girls were chatting. He tried not to eavesdrop, but he remembered hearing Tohru chirp, "That's great, Uo-chan! It's not very healthy to have that habit anyway." The piece of information was deemed unimportant, so he didn't dwell on it too long.

Until that cigarette sparked the remembrance.

Uo quickly whipped her head around to face him. Her golden hair fanned over her shoulders with the motion. A light film of snowflakes shimmered atop her head. The Yankee's eyes were huge when they took in his form. He could swear he saw tears diamonding the whites of her eyes. But with a blink, the tears were gone.

"Who asked you? Mind your damn business, you dyed hair freak."

Hatsuharu recoiled as if she had punched him with her words. "What the hell's your problem?" he shot back at her. Kyo had really gotten to him. He usually wasn't so hostile with acquaintances. "And I don't dye my hair, just so you know," he added hastily with a touch of annoyance.

"You don't dye your hair my ass. I bet you and Kyo-kun go to the salon together all the time. That boy's hair color can't be natural. It's too freakishly orange," she ranted.

"Better to have dyed hair, which I don't, than to be a stupid Yankee wannabe thug like you."

Glaring at Hatsuharu, Uo snatched the still lit cigarette from between her lips. He could see a trace of light pink lipstick on the tobacco stuffed stick. Lipstick? Since when did Uo wear lipstick? She was a complete tomboy… right? At least he had assumed so.

"How dare you? You don't know anything about me."

"And whose fault is that?" he snarled. Even he was taken aback by the vitriol in his voice. Since when did he care about whether Uo associated with him or not?

The question caught her off guard as well. She peered into his eyes quizzically as if seeing him for the first time.

Needing an action to distract himself, he swiped her cigarette from her loose grip and stuck it between his teeth. He tasted tobacco and the almost perfumed taste of her lipstick. He took a long drag and coughed the cigarette smoke into the air.

"Dammit," he muttered as a blush fired up his cheeks. He hoped the dark concealed his embarrassment. He had never smoked before and honestly just wanted to look cool in front of her. He didn't even know why. It was as if her bitterness was an ambrosia he wanted to taste. The more she pushed him away, the more he wanted her.

 _Wanting… her? Me, wanting her? Hah. Impossible._

"Did you lace this cigarette with crack or something?" Hatsuharu complained between hacking coughs. The smoke sizzled in his lungs. The more he coughed, the more he felt suffocated. _How can she enjoy this? She must be a gangster,_ he speculated.

Uo laughed loudly. "You novice," she crowed. "You're a weak little shit. Do I have to school you on this too?"

A laugh came to Hatsuharu's lips. "You could never school me. I'm the master. Remember that."

She cocked her eyebrow in response. "I'll remember that," she replied sarcastically. But she soon smiled.

He found himself smiling back as they shared the cigarette.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

Hatsuharu's hand closed around the cigarette carton as the vision swirled away from his mind. Their first true meeting was a bittersweet memory now. They were just innocent teens back then, sharing a cigarette.

Sharing a secret.

Their meeting had come about by chance. Their tentative friendship… It was never supposed to go too far.

But in defiance, they crossed the line and never came back.

He uncurled his fingers from her forgotten cigarettes and hastily pulled one free. This one was stained with a trace of her lipstick. Uo had a bad habit of sticking a cigarette between her lips, leaving it dangling as she multitasked. Then the desire to smoke would pass or she would forget to light it. Uo would return the unused cigarette to its rightful place. She was battling with herself to quit. "I gotta stop buying these damn cigs," she would mutter under her breath. But she always did anyway.

Hatsuharu tasted the same cosmetic taste on his tongue when he pushed the cigarette between his lips. It was always the same: a mix of perfume and the slight taste of metal. He lined his lips up carefully with her faint lip print. It was almost as if he could feel her lips on his.

 _Pathetic. I'm pathetic._

His eyelids fluttered over his eyes as he leaned back. He tried to fight the urge to light it, but he couldn't take it any longer. He wasn't the same inexperienced teen with the hacking cough who almost died at the hands of a stolen cigarette.

That stolen cigarette turned into…

…A stolen kiss, and then….

He stole her virginity, and in return…

She stole his heart right out from under him without him even knowing.

He hadn't known until now.

And now it was too late.

Hatsuharu could only steal her cigarettes now and drown his sorrow in her alcohol.

He found his silver lighter with a Chinese style dragon engraved in the steel. The lighter sparked to life when he quickly flipped the lid. The flame touched the tip of the cigarette. Hatsuharu breathed in deep. The nicotine flooded his body. He blew out the smoke but the taste of lipstick still lingered on his tongue.

The worst feeling in the world was this gaping hole inside him. He knew that no matter how he felt, there was nothing he could do to change her mind. Once Uo's mind was made up on something, it was hard to break that resolution. Of course, he wanted to run into her arms and tell her he loved her.

But what could he do? Uo had made it perfectly clear that she wanted nothing to do with him.

Feeling hopeless, he burned through the rest of his cigarette.

* * *

Several days had passed since Uo walked out on him.

Hatsuharu tried to live his life like always, to go on even though his heart was breaking. But at every turn, a certain coarse Yankeeish phrase or a flash of champagne hair would remind him of Uo. Every blonde he saw in the street, he pursued longingly with his eyes. He hoped that the long tresses would belong to her, but they never did. The women never had eyes as blue as hers, or hair as long as hers.

Hanging around Tohru, Yuki, Hana, Momiji, and Kyo became painful. When they caught up over coffee or drinks, he felt a gaping hole in his heart.

Every time, he would see the same faces except one.

Uo was absent from every one of their excursions.

He spoke to Tohru about the absence once he found some time alone with her. Yuki wouldn't divulge much information and Kyo would just grunt with the mere mention of the ex-Yankee's name.

Tohru confided in him through unshed tears and a wobbling voice that Uo was AWOL. She wasn't coming out. She cut off all types of contact with her friends. Tohru was rightfully concerned about her friend.

Hatsuharu was shocked. He understood her avoiding their social circle in order to not run into him. But the very act of Uo ostracizing her best friends was baffling to him.

Which was why he decided that tonight, he had to take action. No more hanging in the background, waiting for her to come around.

He had to bring her back. _For Tohru-kun's sake_ , he tried to fool himself into believing, but his intentions were a little more self-centered than that.

Hatsuharu stepped outside. Nighttime was reigning supreme over the dying sun's rays. The sky was a deep majestic purple as he made long strides from his legs to his bicycle.

 _Uo always teased me for riding this bicycle around,_ he remembered with a smirk as he made himself comfortable on the bike's seat. His goggles, which were hanging around his neck, made their way over his eyes. He balanced his feet over the pedals, leaned his body forward, and propelled himself forward.

He couldn't help it if she thought this bike, and the act of him riding a bike around for transportation, was dorky. It was great exercise, and much faster than walking.

And right now, time was vital.

Hatsuharu pedaled his bike quickly through the brisk night air. Spring was coming, but winter still had the warmer season imprisoned. Everywhere he looked, he saw evidence of last night's freakish snowfall. The streets were still slick with ice, which made maneuvering his bicycle difficult. But through the freezing air burning his lungs, he pushed on.

The avenues filled with luxury boutiques and upscale cafes soon transformed into run-down shanties and dilapidated store fronts. Uo's neighborhood wasn't the safest to travel in at night, especially on a vehicle as obvious as his.

The route to Uo's house was one filled with twists and turns through shadowy parts of the neighborhood. It was as quiet as a ghost town.

Their lifestyles were so different, yet exactly the same. Uo's home life wasn't the best. She confided in Hatsuharu about the pain she endured as a child, and even now. She was saving up money from her part-time jobs to move out of her house and start fresh. Uo had big dreams of eventually going to college and making her mark. Despite graduating from high school, she still needed to save a lot of money for school, which was why she was still working two jobs. She didn't have a career path set, but she was hopeful for the future. She dreamed of studying abroad and discovering more of the world.

That was one thing Hatsuharu really envied about Uo. Despite the pain in her life, she was still able to dream. Hatsuharu gave up dreaming long ago. But he supported her goals and dreams for her life. He hoped she could live the life she always dreamed for herself.

He braked hard in front of her house. It wasn't much to look at. The house was thrown in dark shadows, but even in the dark it was obvious that the home was dirty and broken down. Hatsuharu's heart dropped seeing her house. He had only made a visit to her home one time before, and she had damn near sliced his head off for daring to stop by. She was so embarrassed, and so angry to show him that side of her…

Hatsuharu continued looking up into what he guessed was her window. The dingy white and blue polka-dotted curtain was closed and it looked like the light was off. But given the time of night, it didn't seem possible that the Yankee was asleep.

He squinted into the small room as if his concentrated efforts would grant him x-ray vision to see the inside. There was no activity from any part of the house, not even the living room. When looking around at the other houses, the curtains and blinds were drawn but at least a sliver of yellow light would signal that someone was home. Here, Uo's home was cold and dark, and quiet, too quiet.

He found a loose rock by his boot. Even if it was in vain, he had to try. His fingers scooped up the rock and he closed his fist around it. He hesitated. What if her dad was home? There would be no doubt a fight would take place. Not only was he an alcoholic, he was an abusive sonofabitch at that. _Bastard,_ he thought with a scowl and clenched teeth.

But he wasn't here for a fight with her father. He was there for Uo, to make sure she was okay. And to… what? Win her back? But what was he winning her back from? They weren't in a relationship. Their "relationship," if it could be called that, was only based on the physical. At least that was what Uo thought.

He peered into her window once more. If only he could see inside…

If only he could see inside her mind and heart, and know how she truly felt about him.

He launched the rock at her window with steely determination. Anticipation, nervousness, and fear swam through his veins. He paused. Surely the rock made enough noise for her to hear if she was inside.

The minutes that passed by felt like centuries. He stood, frozen, his eyes straining on that precious window. Everything depended on her coming to the window and hearing him out. Either she would peer out, or she would ignore him. Or, the worst case scenario, it wouldn't be Uo who discovered him there. But the risks in his mind were worth the reward of seeing her again, if only for an instant.

His breath came out in shallow gasps. His heart squeezed painfully as he heard rustling. A sliver of light shone through the window's edge suddenly.

The window opened…


	3. Chapter 3

A note: There is a reference to characters speaking interchangeably in Japanese and English. Of course, Fruits Basket is a Japanese anime (duh right), but unfortunately I don't have the capacity to speak/write in Japanese. So bear with me as you use your imagination haha.

Thank you so much to anyone who's reading and reviewing. I couldn't have found the inspiration to write if it weren't for you.

Okay, I'll stop yapping and get on with the chapter.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

* * *

"Hey! You damn punk! Just what do you think you're doing?!"

Hatsuharu froze. The face was covered in shadows, but it was apparent that the voice and profile didn't match Uo's at all. The voice was scratchy and old, and he could hear soft mewing inside of the house now that he thought about it. Uo didn't have any pets, which meant…

 _Oh, crap. I'm at the wrong house._

The moonlight finally caught the stranger's face. Her wiry gray hair was spun tight around pink rollers. A pair of cat-eyed frames decked her chubby face. Her thin lips were dead set on twisting into a grimace. Perhaps her face was stuck that way?

"I'll call the police if you pull this shit again! Better yet, I'll get my shotgun!"

Hatsuharu snapped back into reality. "I-I'm terribly sorry, obaa-san. I must've gotten lost," he mumbled by way of apology. With a hasty bow goodbye, he quickly balanced himself over his bike's seat, secured his feet atop the pedals, and cycled away at high speed.

 _That was close,_ he thought with a sigh. The night was getting colder and colder. The shadows seemed to swallow him whole. As he whipped his eyes around his surroundings, he noticed that the streets weren't familiar to him at all. In fact, Hatsuharu was terribly lost.

 _Great. Just great. What a way to spend my Friday. That damn Yankee,_ he thought with a humorless grin.

"Just how am I supposed to find her now?" he asked his shadowy surroundings as he rounded a corner and pedaled down another unfamiliar street.

 _I need to think… if I were a hurt, confused ex-Yankee who just "broke up" with her friends with benefits, where would I go?_

He froze in his tracks. Snowflakes floated down over him, but for once he felt warm.

"I've got it," he grinned as he retraced his path and sped to his destination. "Let's just hope I don't get lost this time."

* * *

It was nearly midnight when Hatsuharu rolled up to the decrepit building. It was a wonder he didn't get pickpocketed or seriously messed up, but it seemed that there was an angel looking out for him tonight. He used his feet to brake sharply at the entrance and took a moment to inspect his new destination. It was vital that he verify that he was at the right place.

The name of the billiards bar, Blitz, blinked up at him half-heartedly with an inconsistency attributed to neglect. Some letters of the Western style tavern were shrouded in darkness. Nevertheless, the electric red lights painted a semi effective illumination over the winter night. The boxy building was a depressing shade of beige, and graffiti of all hues marked the surface.

It was a depressing place, a meat market full of beefy, tattooed Yakuza gangsters and other filth. Which was why Uo loved the place so much. Since she was one of the only females that graced the dump with her presence, she insisted that the bartenders were extra sweet to her. Plus, she loved a good game of pool when the mood struck her. Hatsuharu was lousy at the game. He didn't like it at all, but that didn't stop her from dragging him with her on her pool nights.

 _Where can I stash this where it won't get stolen?_ he wondered. It was doubtful that he could find a safe haven for his bicycle. The streets were deserted, with not even a car's headlights to light up the darkness. But still, he had to be cautious.

After moments of deliberation (and quizzical looks from the few patrons who were leaving), he hastily stuffed his bike in a shadowy corner behind a nearby anorexic-looking tree. He had no way of securing the bike to the scraggly thing, but there was no time for that. He puffed up his shoulders to make his frame seem taller and more menacing than it was, and strutted into the bar.

The interior was even more depressing than its exterior. Cigarette smoke formed a hazy fog over the establishment. A smattering of bikers, only one or two of them with female dates, dotted the dimly lit tavern. Ratty vinyl stools lined the beat up looking bar, which housed a plethora of different spirits. An overweight balding man was busying himself with cleaning the perpetually dusty beer mugs. He wore a red bow tie that looked out of place with his age, and a black vest that was too small.

The man, as out of place as he looked, was actually the owner of the bar. He was a stark contrast to his freakishly tall, steroids-muscled, heavily tattooed clientele. But he was a nice guy overall. He was an ex-Navy officer, a foreigner who had been stationed in Japan, found a nice Japanese wife, and bore lots of hafu children together. Why he bothered to keep this bar open was a mystery to Hatsuharu. But he'd had some conversations with the older gentleman, and the love of billiards kept him in business.

Hatsuharu approached the owner with a friendly grin. It was good to see a familiar face at least. He was a little intimidated (which he would never admit out loud, not even to himself), and greeting the man was a welcomed distraction.

"Hey, Mr. Johnny. It's good to see you," he greeted the male in halting English. His English was pretty good, but he was far from a native speaker. Cram school, plus taking English during regular school hours when he was in high school, had done him some good. At least for a casual conversation. Plus, he liked to practice whenever he could.

"Hey there, Spotted Dick," Johnny greeted him in Japanese with a boyish twinkle in his eye. Johnny loved teasing him about his black and white hair, hence the name. He was convinced Hatsuharu dyed it and was keeping it a secret from him.

"How's life?" he persisted in English. They always played this game. Hatsuharu would try to speak to Johnny in English, he would reply right back in his near-perfect Japanese. It was a little irritating to Hatsuharu, but he welcomed the idle chitchat.

Johnny gave him a shrug and a long sigh. "Seen better days, kid," he responded, this time in English. "Not getting the type of business that I used to. A lot of thugs coming in now. Y'know, this used to be a classy joint. Real men playing pool, playing fairly, just having a good time. Now, the scum of the Earth just want to come in for cheap booze and a brawl. It's probably time for me to close up soon. Yuko's thinking of settling in the countryside. Might be a good time for me to retire anyway."

"I hear you," Hatsuharu replied in a voice that betrayed his lack of interest. His gray eyes locked onto a familiar blonde.

Her back was turned to him, but he could recognize her in any direction. Uo leaned over the billiard table, giving him an excellent view of her backside. Not that she was in anything revealing. The long schoolgirl skirt that she insisted on wearing even though she was no longer a schoolgirl was still hanging from her waist. Her arm was cocked back in a striking stance, hand gripping the pool cue. If he could see her face, he knew there would be a deep furrow between her perfectly tweezed eyebrows, and her eyes would be locked in on the prize.

Before her, a man clad in a black leather jacket adorned with sharp silver spikes leered at the unsuspecting Uo. His thick lips shone with saliva and his eyes gleamed with impure thoughts. His tattoos flexed over tanned, muscled skin as he crossed his arms. Hatsuharu didn't like the way the gangster was looking at Uo, but it was to be expected. This was typically a biker bar, and Uo was a beautiful young woman with a smart mouth. Her cockiness turned the stupid thugs on. She'd had to break many a bone in order to get her point across that she wasn't interested.

Johnny followed his eyes over to the subject of Hatsuharu's interest. He issued a low whistle of approval. "She's a catch, boy. You did good."

Hatsuharu laughed humorlessly. Unsurprisingly, Uo still wasn't alerted to his presence. Once she was in the zone, she was deaf to everything around her. "I guess you could say that," he said softly. His gaze softened. "Truthfully, she was never really mine."

Johnny swung his blue eyes over to the young Sohma. The wrinkles creating spider webs around his eyes deepened in his consternation. "Coulda fooled me. Why don't you go up to her?"

He sighed deeply in response. "I really messed up. I don't know if it's too late for us."

"You won't know if you don't give it a shot." He felt Johnny's large hand clamp on his shoulder. "It's worth a try. I see the way you look at her. You're crazy about her."

The loud crack of the pool cue against the balls on the billiards table interrupted his thoughts. Uo practically jumped in the air. She pumped her fist in victory. "Yes!" she cheered. "I win, buddy. Time to pay up."

The goon's face quickly transformed from lust to irritation. He sucked his teeth in distaste. "Think again, girlie. You cheated, I know you did."

Her victory cheers soon turned into hostility. He could almost see a fan of fire surrounding her as her body stiffened. He saw her cross her arms, pool cue secured in the crook of her arm. "You owe me, dammit. I beat you, end of story. You have to hold up the end of your bet. If I had lost, I'd pay you back. Now, stop whining like a little bitch, put on your big girl panties, and show me the money, motherfucker."

"N-Now come on, fella. Pay the little lady. A bet's a bet." Johnny approached the biker and Uo from behind the bar. He opened his arms in a nonthreatening gesture. He tried to appease the disgruntled thug with a smile. Hatsuharu could detect the small tremble vibrating his jiggly body.

"I got this, Johnny-san," Uo growled, not once breaking her eye contact with her pool opponent. The ex-Yankee folded herself into a fighting stance. Her fists were locked firmly in front of her, pool cue guarding her person. She was ready to attack at a moment's notice. That sentence paired with her body language epitomized her entire life. She always wanted to handle things alone, with her fists, on her own terms. True, she had left the gang and most of the ruffian life behind. But when tested, Uo never backed down. It was a stubbornness that Hatsuharu begrudgingly admired about her.

The time to hang back was over. He knew that he was probably one of the last people Uo wanted to see right now. But he couldn't let her fight alone. Hatsuharu backed away from his comfortable leaning stance and approached her.

"Heh. You're not getting one yen from my damn hands. You'll have to kill me first," the thug snarled. He practically threw himself over the billiards table at Uo.

"I'll call the damn police if you don't stop!" Johnny bellowed. Too many years of civilian life had made him too soft. No way could he last in a fight with the goon, Navy training or not. Johnny was too slow and out of shape to last in hand-to-hand combat.

"That's enough," Hatsuharu said coldly, appearing by Uo's side. He stared into the thug's soulless black orbs. He backed the command with a blade of contempt sharpening his words. Hatsuharu's hands balled into fists, ready to strike.

He felt Uo's sapphire eyes stabbing him. "I said I got this. And what are you doing here?" she hissed.

Hatsuharu ignored her bitter query. All he could see was that this buffoon was harassing Uo and he wanted to shut him up permanently.

The thug stomped over to Hatsuharu and Uo. He was at least twice the size of them, if not more. He was like a skyscraper. Or perhaps King Kong described him better. His barrel chest and his monkey arms certainly gave him the appearance of an ape. He even beat his chest like one.

"You're gonna regret that, boy."

Hatsuharu was ready. His fists were cocked like pistols. His eyes glinted with a steely coldness that took Uo's breath away. But he could barely register her emotions. It was time to harness all of his concentration into his newest enemy.

"Fuck you!" he screamed as he aimed for the giant's head.

The goon blocked his attack and used a thick arm to smack him down. He hit the floor and immediately saw stars.

"Haru-kun!" He could hear Uo's voice, but his vision was blinded by his eyelids. All he saw was dizzying black. The grotesque beast yanked him up by the collar of his jacket.

Johnny's voice came next, though he could barely understand the words through the pain. "I'm calling the police!" He heard shuffling feet. So much for having Johnny's backup. He couldn't blame him. The giant was scary even to him, and he was almost as seasoned a martial artist as Kyo.

"Let go of him, you fucking coward!" Uo's voice screamed next. "Your bad blood is between you and me, not him. He's not even part of this!"

"You shouldn't have sicced your boyfriend on me, fucking bitch. Now you and him are both gonna pay."

Hatsuharu's eyes snapped open. He felt different.

Darker.

Angrier.

More…

Sinister.

Haru launched his feet into the thug's gut and kicked off, using the momentum to escape his grip. While the thug stupidly lunged for him, he jumped up and kicked him in the head.

"Cheap shots!" he crowed, but Haru was busy firing off rounds of his punches everywhere he could aim. The punches barely seemed to have an effect on him, but he persisted. The goon simply side stepped his attacks and threw a few solid punches himself. Haru was able to dodge his clumsy blows, but he grew sweaty and red-faced, not to mention weary. He didn't know how long he could keep this up, even if he had just turned Black.

But he needn't have worried, because Uo approached the thug from behind, jumped up, and slammed the pool cue into the ruffian's head with all of her strength.

The thug whipped around to face the ex-Yankee. She was panting with the exertion. The pool cue was split into two jagged pieces. She wielded the new weapons in each hand. With a strength and speed that shocked Haru, Uo flew at him and shoved the broken pool cue parts into the attacker's bulging eyes.

"ARGHHHHH!" The attacker had just turned into the attacked. He fell back with a heavy thud that rattled the billiards table. Haru heard police sirens in the distance. They would advance soon, and that would spell trouble for all of them.

But Uo wasn't done. She strutted over to the fallen thug and stomped her left foot into his bloated throat. She brandished one half of the spiky pool cue at his neck. Her eyes were filled with malice.

"Pay up, dammit," Uo swore.

"F-Fine. Fuck," the defeated villain answered weakly. He held his eyes while rolling to his side in pain. "Grab my wallet and get the fucking money. Damn wench."

Uo fished in his giant pockets and found a wallet stuffed with yen. Uo plucked out a thick stack of bills and flung the wallet over his defeated body.

"Took a little extra to pay for damages," Uo sneered. She looked over at Haru and grabbed his hand. The soft contact caught him by surprise. "Let's get outta here," she growled.

"R-Right," he agreed. They sped out of the bar hand in hand into the cold darkness.

Bright red and blue lights were flashing from several blocks away. They had to make moves fast in order to retreat to safety. As soon as the cops busted the joint and saw the thug lying in pain on the ground, they'd start asking questions and looking for answers. Haru knew Johnny would never squeal on them, but it was better for them to make themselves scarce. They'd already done enough damage tonight.

Uo and Haru rounded the corner. Luckily, his bike was still in the exact same spot he left it. He silently thanked God and his angels for protection as he hopped in the driver's seat.

"Hop on," Haru commanded in a voice as cold as gunmetal.

"Like hell I'm going anywhere with you," she shot back.

"You don't have a choice!" he yelled exasperatedly. "In case you haven't noticed, the police are gonna be here any minute and you're wasting time. Get the fuck on this bike!"

Uo opened her lips to mouth off at him for being so rough with her. But the ascending noise level of the sirens made her change her mind.

She launched herself into the tiny seat and tied her arms tightly around his waist from behind. "Finally," he muttered as he sped off in the opposite direction of the fast approaching cop cars.

He pedaled faster and harder than he ever had in his entire life. He had to get them away from there at any cost. He couldn't risk Uo being in danger. He leaned into the opposing wind as he pedaled harder and harder until it felt as if his legs were going to fall off. Haru pushed himself to pedal through the pain.

He felt Uo's arms squeeze him around the waist. He could tell she was worried, but she was trying to conceal her emotions. He grinned all the same. If it took a dangerous situation to make her hold him like that, then maybe it was worth it.

The tattered neighborhood soon turned into fashionable boutiques and charming cafes again. Even though it was sure to be past midnight, Haru had never felt more illuminated. The streetlamps shined comforting light over their bodies and the wind even felt warmer in this part of town.

His bike skidded to a halt. He planted his feet on the ground in the middle of the street. It was time for a break. His heart was hammering in his chest and he could barely breathe. He placed his hand over his heart, gasping. Haru swiped at the sweat that beaded on his brow.

Behind him, he felt Uo descend from his bicycle. He turned around to face her. His bike clattered to the ground but he barely noticed. Haru felt his cheeks flush as he looked at her. Her cheeks were camellia-red from the fight and her hair was a cyclone. Even her eyes reflected the chaos of tonight, all wide and wild. But she was still a beautiful sight for him.

His mind worked through the memories of him and her together. A flurry of white sheets and tangled limbs floated to his mind. He was imagining himself kissing… Haru growled to dissipate the memory. That was a different time, long ago. Those carefree days were gone. They were replaced with her eyes glaring into him and this hostile aura radiating from her body.

"It looks like we're safe now," he offered lamely. He couldn't think of anything else to say. He should've pedaled her safely home to be honest, but she had insisted they get as far away from the scene of the incident as possible. He headed in the direction of what he hoped was his apartment. Perhaps Uo would object, but he knew that his place was better than the alternative.

Uo crossed her arms, then she thought to self-consciously comb her fingers through her bird's nest hair. It made one corner of Haru's mouth flicker up slightly.

Her frosty glare made his crooked smile disappear. She folded her arms across her chest menacingly.

"Just what the fuck was that back there?"

Haru's mouth gaped open in bewilderment. "'Just what the fuck was that'?" he repeated. "I just saved your ass is what just fucking happened."

"Correction. I saved your dumb ass from that mistake. I told you not to meddle in my life," Uo retorted. "You know better than to fight a guy that's both bigger and stronger than you. You really fucked up this time. I told you, I could handle it. And you didn't listen, like always. And now Johnny-san's—"

"Fuck Johnny-san!" he screamed. "He ran away like a dog with its tail between its legs when shit got hot. He didn't do a damn thing to help you."

"He did more than you. He hung back and called for backup because he knew he couldn't handle it. You should've just let me take care of it. I can handle my own shit."

"You fought dirty and you know it. If I hadn't distracted him, he would've pulverized you," Haru countered. He knew this was a lie, of course. But he wanted to lash out and hurt Uo where it would wound her the most. True to form, his words caused a vein to simmer on her forehead. She gritted her teeth at him in rage.

"I'm not some fragile maiden that needs saving. Did you think that stupidly throwing yourself into that fight was gonna impress me? God, you're even dumber than Kyo-kun, and I thought that was impossible."

That was it. Haru's hands curled into fists by his sides. "Don't you dare put me in the same league as Kyo-kun. I'm way better than him," he snapped.

Uo cocked a thin, arched eyebrow. Raising her chin like the daughter of a king, she crowed, "Seems I struck a nerve. Do me a favor and stay out of my life. I'll be sure to stay out of yours."

"Your safety concerns me."

"Do I need to spell it out for you?!"

Haru recoiled at her sharp tone.

Uo maintained her eye contact with Haru. "It's over. I told you already. I'm bored of you."

"You're so conceited. This isn't about you."

Another perfectly placed lie, but Uo froze as if she believed it. He had to lay the foundation for his falsehood in order to keep her in the dark.

"Like hell it isn't," she scoffed halfheartedly. Her eyes skidded away from his. This was the perfect moment to cement his version of the truth.

"You can yell at me. You can hate me. You can even hit me. But don't just ignore me like I'm nothing!"

Her mouth, which was supposed to fire off a nasty retort, just hung open in shock.

"Don't just ignore your friends like they're nothing," he added hastily. He was getting off track. "Tohru-kun was so worried about you. You just went ghost for several days. Of course she's gonna be upset. You, Hana-chan, and Tohru-kun are like the damn Three Musketeers for God's sake. Even damn Kyo-kun was worried about you, and the only one he cares about is his precious Tohru-kun."

Silence crawled past them, but the air between them crackled with electricity. He could feel a mixture of emotions: hurt, anger… and love.

His heart was softening with love towards her. He even missed the way she bore holes through him with her laser gaze. He missed his caustic, callous, violent, showoff ex-Yankee friend with benefits that he was in love with.

Their relationship was messed up. He knew that by the number of adjectives he had to list to categorize her. But the archives of his memories were filled with nothing but Uo.

Uo's kindness.

Her voice.

Her face.

Her gentle smile that she would show him in her tender moments.

The way she was so concerned about him earlier tonight, and how she avenged him. As much as Uo tried to play it off, he knew she cared about him.

He missed their long conversations. Conversations about everything and anything. The meaning of life. Religion. Politics. Their favorite animes. Their biggest fears. Nothing was off limits for them.

He missed holding her hand when they were alone and staring into endless blue.

How could he possibly convey the weight of his feelings for her in only a few minutes?

It was impossible.

Time resumed its usual flow. Uo regained her composure by throwing Haru a look of contempt. It was her defense mechanism. It was easier for her to put up a front of being pissed and angry than it was for her to show her true feelings.

"...I'm sorry that I haven't reached out to Tohru-kun and Hana-chan," she admitted with an edge to her words. She folded her arms firmly across her chest. "What happened between you and me shouldn't affect my friendship with my best friends. I'll admit that I was wrong for that. But even so, you need to stay far away from me. I could say it a thousand times and you probably won't get it. But if you get near me again, I swear to God I'll kill you," she threatened with a low growl.

The threat made the tiny hairs all over his body stand up straight. She issued the proclamation with such a force impacting her voice. She sounded dead serious.

"I'm going back to Kureno-kun," she continued through his stunned silence. "This was just all a huge mistake. A distraction from what was really important."

 _Wait... No..._ Haru's stomach sank. His vision became fuzzy, as if he were speeding through a dark tunnel into the light.

He opened his mouth to say something, but no words would come out. He wanted to tell her, really tell her, how much he loved her. But the words wouldn't come. Not in the face of this slap to his pride.

Her eyes weren't taking in his shocked form. She was looking past him, into the future it seemed. "I want to make things right with him. It was a mistake to give up on him. I know now that I'm in love with him and that he's the one for me."

He gazed into space as she picked up the discarded getaway vehicle. She mounted his bike. "I'm leaving and I'm taking your bike," she informed him as her feet found the pedals. She looked over at him over her shoulder. "Don't worry though. I'm not stealing it. I need to get home fast. I'll return the bike to Tohru-kun and she'll give it back to you."

Hatsuharu glared at the ground as Uo biked away into the night.

Darkness swallowed her whole.


	4. Chapter 4

I just want to thank the wonderful authors/authoresses who reviewed my fic the very beginning. Thank you so much for your support as I struggle through updating my story. I really appreciate it. Thank you to all of those who are reading and following along as well. Don't forget to please leave a review. I could use all the support I can get! On to the next chapter!

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

* * *

He threw himself on his futon with a frustrated sigh.

Hatsuharu was finally home after his wild, crazy night. When he had his showdown with Uo, he was mere blocks away from his apartment. Sure, it had taken him a few twists and turns, and dead ends to reach his home. But he was safely inside and that was what mattered.

Uo's words swirled through his mind. No matter how hard he pressed his pillow to his ears, her voice seeped through.

" _I'm going back to Kureno-kun… This was just all a huge mistake. A distraction from what was really important."_

It couldn't be true… could it? It was true that Uo and Kureno were once romantically involved with each other. But there were too many unanswered questions, too many mysteries. This was around the time that the curse was still in full effect, which explained Kureno's skittish attitude towards her. Eventually, Uo got tired of the excuses for them not to be together, and she promptly ended it. If she couldn't trust him, then it wouldn't work.

Hatsuharu had thought that she was over Kureno, but perhaps her feelings had never ended…

Just the thought of her thinking about Kureno, yearning for another man while she was with him…

It made him sick.

Groaning, he removed his arm that was dripping over his dazed eyes to check the time. 4:33am. The sun would be rising in a few hours.

 _I gotta get to sleep_ , he told himself sternly as he shifted into a fetal position. _I have class tomorrow._

But the threat of oversleeping didn't deter him. He shot back up.

He had to do something, anything, to keep his mind off of his ex… what? Ex-friend? Ex-lover? Just how did he see Uo, and how did she regard him?

 _I must've meant nothing to her,_ he reflected somberly as he dragged his feet to the bathroom for a shower. _If she could look me straight in the eye and tell me she was in love with Kureno-kun the whole time, she must not care about me at all. I should just… let her go._

The water rained hot and quick drops over his back as he contemplated his life. He could barely feel the stinging sensations pricking his skin. The bathroom was soon enveloped in steam, clouding his sight.

A clear view wouldn't have done him any good anyway. He was too busy reflecting on the history of their strange relationship…

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

 ** _Four months ago..._**

The loud music blaring from the speakers made his insides quiver with energy. Even the ground was shaking in what seemed to be an audio-induced earthquake. But the club goers didn't seem to mind as they moved in their own ways to the music.

The nightclub was a writhing, hot, sweaty den of lust and he let himself get carried in the change of scenery. Here, everyone was so different. There were people of all heights, shapes, and ethnicities. He spotted more than a few foreign faces in the crowd.

He drained the last of his cranberry and vodka as he spotted two attractive youngsters feeling the music as well as each other. The caramel-colored foreign girl with short black hair rolled her hips firmly into the crotch of a spiky-haired male. He was grinning lasciviously down at her curvy bottom as he grinded hard against her.

 _Wow,_ Hatsuharu thought as he issued a low whistle of appreciation that he was sure was clouded in the fog of smoke, music, and sin.

He felt fairly certain that he blended in well enough. He wore a spiky black choker and a loose fitting V-neck black tee over strategically shredded midnight-hued jeans. The clubbers weren't quite as punk as he was, with his multiple ear piercings and eyes heavily rimmed in obsidian kohl. But it was no matter. He was used to feeling different.

He turned to the male bartender on duty and ordered another drink, this time a Jameson on the rocks. A hard-hitting, gritty rap beat filled the speakers. The swift change in genres elicited a cry of approval from the youngsters as they writhed passionately to the new track.

Hatsuharu appreciated the erratic atmosphere, but he knew she wouldn't have liked it at all. In contrast, Rin would've scowled heavily at the grinding youths. She would've complained that the music was too loud, the drinks were too expensive, and that everyone was a sick pervert. She would've hated how the music darted from American Hip Hop to Rap, swooped down to R&B and then floated up to an energetic Dancehall tune before flipping to a J-Pop number.

He was there by himself, drinking himself into a stupor, to forget that particular dark-haired temptress. Things had turned rocky between them and it was unlikely that they could repair their relationship. Hatsuharu wanted to go somewhere that didn't remind him of her. This energetic club was the perfect contrast to her sulky persona. But as he felt his stomach wring itself out to dry, he feared that nothing he could do would distance himself from fantasies of her.

Until he locked eyes on a flash of gleaming sunflower-blonde.

In the most unlikely of places, he spotted a flower dancing in a sea of weeds. She certainly was as tall as a sunflower, if not taller. He nearly choked on his drink as he did a dramatic double take.

 _Uotani-san?_

Uo was perched atop sky high stilettos that were as dark as her slinky black dress. She was surrounded by a field of women. They were most likely her friends, although the faces weren't familiar to him. Their unified body language was a strong testament to their camaraderie. They moved almost in sync with each other to the music.

He sipped at his whiskey as he gulped her figure in, starting with flaxen strands, then travelling to almond-shaped blue eyes framed with long lashes. He drank in her ruby lips, the smooth pale skin of her collarbone. His gaze dripped with more than a casual glance over her breasts straining against the curve-hugging dress, and finally seeped over her slim hips and lengthy stems.

The song ended and the DJ played a slow, sensual number. Still unaware of his gaze, she curled her body to the music. Her eyes were squeezed shut as she smiled. Uo was losing herself, and he was too if he could be honest with himself. He had to tear his eyes away lest he become a target of the former gang member's malice.

But he couldn't help it. _Who knew Uotani-san was a dancing queen?_ He chuckled to himself at the thought as he finished his drink. His mind flashed back to their meeting. So much time had passed since their stolen cigarette together. She was the one who showed him how to take long drags without feeling as though he would cough up his lungs. What happened? Why hadn't they kept in touch? For some inexplicable reason, they kept their distance from each other once more. It was a comfortable role for them to occupy. They were mere acquaintances, practically strangers to each other. End of story.

But Hatsuharu was feeling brave. He could say hello to her at least. It was rare that their paths crossed so organically.

With a huge grin that he hoped didn't betray his lack of inhibitions, he sauntered over to the dancing maven locked securely in that tight ring of girlfriends.

"Long time no see, Uotani-san," he greeted her with a short bow. Shouted described the action better. He had to project his voice over the loud music.

Her mouth turned into an angry blob as she whipped her head around to face him. She seemed to be on the verge of telling him off. Perhaps she assumed he was yet another sleazy jerk who had come over to hit on her. But when her eyes recognized his face, her angry mouth softened. A flash of regret for that misplaced show of emotion appeared in her features, but she tried to play it off.

"…Hey there, Hatsuharu-kun," she answered with a curt bow. "You're right, it's been a while." She glanced down at the floor. He couldn't read her expression. Was she disappointed that he approached her? Was she looking for an escape?

But he didn't have long to ponder those questions. All at once, the voices of her female companions poured over their halting conversation.

"Uo-kun, who is this handsome devil?"

"Have you been holding out on us, girl? What a cutie!"

"Why haven't we been properly introduced, you sly wench?!"

Uo turned to address her eager friends with a warm laugh. "Chill, guys. He's a friend of a friend. I barely know him. I haven't been holding out on you guys at all."

Hatsuharu was slowly feeling invisible as Uo chatted aimlessly with her girlfriends. "Why don't you introduce me, Uotani-san?" he asked with a little too much ice in his voice.

Uo threw a dismissive glance in the direction of his voice. "Oh… right," she replied casually. "Well, Hatsuharu-kun, this is Roberts Jenny-chan…" she brandished her hand out to a half-Japanese brunette with a stylish pixie cut to refer to her friend. "This one here is Tanaka Chie-chan…" Another wave to a spiky-haired blonde with a nose piercing. "And this sly wench here is Kobayashi Megumi-kun," she announced finally with a grin, poking her thumb at a punk-looking girl with bright pink hair, a lip ring, and arms covered in tattoos. "Ladies, this is Sohma Hatsuharu-kun."

"Hi there, Haru-kun," the females said in exaggeratedly shy tones as they bowed to greet him. He grinned as he returned the gesture. He was used to getting females all tongue tied, but it was still a much needed pat on the back for his ego.

Especially since Uo was being unusually distant. Sure, they were far from bosom buddies or close pals. But he wasn't expecting this cold shoulder coming from her.

He flashed his most charming smile at his new acquaintances. "Do you mind if I dance with you ladies? I came by myself. When I saw Uotani-san, I was happy to see a familiar face."

"Of course you can!" Jenny cried shrilly. It drew a throaty chuckle from him. She was more than several centimeters shorter than her girlfriends. She only came up to a little above his belly button. Her short hair and friendly smile combined with her tiny stature reminded him of a water sprite.

The females made room for Hatsuharu in their circle. The music changed abruptly to a Japanese Hip Hop track, which made Uo's friends squeal happily. Jenny squeezed Uo's hand and beamed up at the tall beauty. Uo rolled her eyes at Jenny, obviously annoyed with her friend. But she soon allowed herself a begrudging smile when Jenny swung her hand back and forth with unbridled glee.

Hatsuharu shouted his answers to Uo's companions when they pried about his life, and gave them all plenty of warm, friendly smiles. But he couldn't peel his eyes off of Uo. She was so alluring. This dancing queen persona was a new side to her that he never could've guessed she possessed.

Without realizing it, he shifted spots with Chie, then Megumi, then Jenny in an odd game of musical chairs. When the next song blared on, he found himself brushed up against Uo.

They were side by side, dancing in their own ways to the music. Their dancing styles were so different. He moved with an aggressive yet smooth swagger. He didn't consider himself the best dancer, but he knew enough moves to get by. Sneaking into nightclubs with a carefree Momiji in tow when they were high schoolers improved his dancing skills quite a bit.

Uo moved like she could feel the music in her very core. She threw her arms up at the right times and swept her hands over her body in a way that was sexy yet coy. Her hips moved in perfect rhythm with the beat. As the music grew louder, her sweeping gestures expanded with it. If anyone else had danced like Uo, they might've looked foolish. However, she had the looks and personality to pull it off. He watched her execute sensual body rolls to her friends' drunken cheers.

"What are you doing?" she hissed from the side of her mouth at him. His presence beside her obviously ticked her off based on the way she shot daggers at him with her heavily lashed eyes.

"Dancing. You should try it sometime," he smirked.

"I am dancing, idiot. What do you think you're doing here, getting all chummy with my friends? Get your own friends."

"I thought we were friends, Uotani-san."

"Don't say my name like that, you nasty pervert."

"First, you get mad at me for dancing innocently next to you, now you're calling me a pervert. I'm not sure where you're getting this information from, but I am a perfect gentleman."

"Hah. Hardly."

Their hushed exchange was barely noted by her drunk companions. They simply danced the night away without a care in the world.

"You need a drink. You're getting hostile for no reason," he concluded. "I'm gonna run off and get you something nice. What's your poison?"

Uo gave him a glare that could melt off his epidermis. "I'm fine," she bit out from between clenched teeth.

"Oh, go with the little sweetheart," Megumi slurred. She pushed Uo into him. "Go, go, go. He's hot and he's a nice guy. We approve. Give him a chance."

"Some friends," Uo muttered, but she turned to the salt-and-pepper-haired male anyway. "I guess I'll go with you. I don't want you to screw up my drink."

They made their way through the thick cloud of dancers to the illuminated bar. Behind it, a tanned woman with dangerous curves and red lips was busy pouring drinks. She nearly took his breath away. The woman was a butter pecan-toned version of Rin, all the way down to her dark, piercing eyes.

"What'll it be, handsome?" The bartender posed the question in a flirty tone, eyes locked in on Hatsuharu. "Will it be a Shirley Temple?" She paused to flip her shiny black locks back with a teasing giggle. "You're a little young to be in a club, aren't you? How did a young thing like you get in, sweetheart?"

"I get that a lot. I must look a little young for my age," he chuckled shyly.

"Hey, I'm here too, y'know," Uo snapped sullenly. Her crabby response made him grin.

"Yeah, sure, honey," the bartender replied distractedly with an airy flick of her hand. "Like I said, what'll it be, gorgeous?" She leaned her body provocatively against the bar so that her breasts nearly spilled out from her red strapless dress. "Might I suggest a sip of me? I'm sweeter than any cocktail," she cooed.

"Pick something and stop gawking. I knew you were a pervert," Uo barked. He could almost swear there was a red blush staining her face. But it was so dark that he couldn't be sure.

He could feel Black Haru spilling to the surface as he smiled back at the sexy bartender. "Oh, I bet you're a real peach," he crooned. Feeling confident, he leaned closer to the dark-haired vixen. She giggled as she reached her hands out to squeeze his bicep. He made sure to flex. He had a reputation to protect after all.

"Are you even listening to me, dammit? Pick something!"

"Two shots of sake," he finally decided with a wink at the coquettish bartender. "Maybe I'll take a sip of you later." She giggled and switched her way to the impressive alcohol collection to grab two shot glasses and a choice bottle of sake.

The bartender softly placed the shot glass, filled to the brim with crystalline sake, in front of Hatsuharu with a smile. But she practically threw the shot glass down in Uo's general direction with a withering glare before she stalked off.

"Damn bitch," she seethed.

"Forget her. Why don't we make this night more fun?" he suggested with a devilish grin as Uo rolled her eyes. "Drinking contest. You and me."

Uo's eyes shot straight through him as she gulped the liquor down. "No contest. I'm beating your scrawny ass."

Once they agreed on the time limit, they started ordering shots. The bartender could barely keep up. Uo and Hatsuharu gulped their shots down in a hurry before rushing to drink the next one. Hatsuharu soon felt the liquor hit him after the third shot. He'd already drunk so much before.

Uo seemed to grow more and more alert with each shot. It was inhuman. How was she still so cognizant while he was teetering on the edge between tipsy and flat out drunk?

No. He was most definitely drunk now. He could tell by the way he brushed up close to her, too close for a "friend of a friend."

"I guess I give up. Any more drinks and I'll pass out," he rationalized as Uo roared at the bartender for yet another shot of sake. She was on her sixth one. She had to be inhuman. She was a tank.

"Don't be such a little baby," she teased as she stuck out her tongue. But she finished the shot hastily anyway. "Let's go find my friends." Her words were finally taking on a tipsy slur.

Walking with their bodies practically pressed together so that they wouldn't lose each other, they pushed through the thick crowd. The club had become even more packed. Hatsuharu couldn't spot any of them in the tangled mass of people.

"Did they really just ditch me?!" Uo screeched. "I think I need another drink."

Hatsuharu couldn't help but laugh. Those girls were mischievous all right. But he couldn't help feeling as though they were doing him a huge favor. Now he could be alone with her. As alone as he could be with her in a nightclub anyway.

The music was pulsing loudly through his body. The liquor sloshing through his veins was making everything seem distorted. He reached out to her disappearing back and pulled her in close.

Uo spun around. "What are you—?"

His lips barely brushed against her ear. "Dance with me."

"You wanna dance at a time like this? I don't know where my friends are! I gotta find them! We came to the club together, so we have to leave together! Argh, I shoulda never left with you! Damn pushy Megumi-kun," she rambled. Her eyes splashed wildly all over the crowded dance floor for a familiar face, but it was useless.

A train of drunk club-goers rushed past them. Uo teetered violently on her high stiletto heels. He placed his hands on her shoulders to help her keep her balance. The brush of his fingers drew a withering glare from Uo in his direction. He held his palms open to her in an innocent pose.

"So what do you propose we do then?" Hatsuharu questioned the testy blonde.

She was feeling cornered. He could tell by the way she crossed her arms defensively and grimaced at him.

"Look, your friends are gonna be fine. And we can't find them. It's too crowded. You need to relax. We'll find them eventually. Unless they actually did ditch you, which would be pretty messed up." His joke wasn't received warmly by Uo, so he switched gears. "Maybe I should go back to that bartender. She was pretty hot, and she knew how to treat a man. I'm feeling so abused right now." He pretended to pout dramatically.

"So you can drool over her fake tits? Hah. I don't think so."

"Oh, come on. Don't be jealous."

"J-Jealous?! Of what? I just didn't like that you were hanging all over her. It was disgusting. I might as well have been a ghost the way you were flirting with each other." She narrowed her eyes. "I don't like that. Being ignored. No one ignores me, ever."

She provided the perfect line for him. He tilted her chin skyward with a drunken smile.

"Capture my attention then."

She stood before him with glassy eyes. Uo had to be drunk. She was acting almost like a jealous girlfriend. An uncaring stranger bumped into her without a glance behind him, which sent her tumbling into him again.

"Come on," he coaxed softly in her ear.

Their eyes met. Her defenses were dissolving in a pool of six sake shots. With those inhibitions drowning, she pushed herself purposely against him.

She closed her eyes so he couldn't see her expression, but he liked the way she felt against him. Electric bolts shot through his body as he placed shy hands on her waist and peeled her away from him. He wanted to handle her gently lest she castrate him and leave him without his manhood. He knew she would beat him senseless at the very least if he was too forward with her.

But it was nice just swaying with her, at arm's length, in contrast with the high tempo that hyped everyone up. He lit up when a smile touched her lips. He wanted her closer, but he wanted to prove her wrong. For some reason, she dismissed him as a pervert, a shameless playboy. No, he wouldn't be grinding on Uo tonight. He would be the perfect high class gentleman.

But the dancing queen seemed to have other ideas. She traced a hand over to the back of his neck and pulled him in.

She grinned. "Why are you dancing with me like we're at a junior high prom?"

"Have to make room for the holy spirit," he offered with a lopsided smirk.

"You told me to capture your attention. This isn't the way to do it. Let's do it my way."

She roped her arms around his neck and shimmied herself closer to him. They began to dance as one to the new slow jam playing. He felt his face flush as their hip bones nearly brushed against each other. She rolled her hips seductively as she slowly broke contact and danced around him. He almost groaned with the loss of her touch, but his eyes followed her as she made one revolution. Her lips were touched with flirtation as her eyes gleamed mischievously at him. She continued to roll her body as she raked her hands through her hair and sent it swirling around her shoulders.

He couldn't take her teasing. Not when her hands were skimming over her silhouette and she was dancing so seductively in front of him. With a low rumble in his throat, he yanked her in close again. It was time to get aggressive again. He knew he was supposed to play the role of "friend of a friend," and keep his distance. But he couldn't help it. He wanted to conquer her.

He spun her around roughly so that her back faced him. The music was changing and so was he. The liquor plus his lusty feelings for her were a powerful potion that he couldn't escape. Hatsuharu pressed Uo's back downward as his hands firmly gripped her waist. He pulled her tightly against him. He heard her issue a soft, "Woah," but he ignored it for the most part. She was probably so shocked that the seemingly aloof and reserved Hatsuharu was capable of getting down so shamelessly with her.

Surely she would back off now. She would spin around and roughly grip him up by his collar. She would berate him for degrading her in that way, she would mouth off at him in her typical Uo way, and order would be restored. He was a little wistful when he put those thoughts in his mind. He didn't want them to stop. But this crazy night would have to end, and he was simply predicting the future.

But instead of that seemingly plausible scenario, something strange happened.

Uo laughed softly. "Amateur," she purred as she shimmied against him.

Her unlikely response nearly knocked the breath out of him. When he dared her to capture his attention, he was only half-joking. He thought that Uo would merely roll her eyes and call him a pervert. He certainly didn't expect her to grind right back on him. He felt his hips reciprocate her movements, pushing harder on her. He was in full gyrating, grinding mode and Uo was loving it.

He felt himself loving it a little too much, which made him break away from her.

Uo popped back up and glanced at him over her shoulder. She folded her lips in a smoldering smile.

"Well? Did I capture your attention?"

She was dripping in perspiration and out of breath as she swiveled around to face him fully. Hatsuharu's breath caught in his throat. She was so gorgeous. _I want to make her mine_ , he found himself wishing.

But then he tried to dislodge that notion from his brain with a violent shake. _What am I thinking? I must be drunk,_ he argued back.

"Hatsuharu-kun?"

He snapped back into focus. It was time to put up a mask of nonchalance, so he folded his arms and lifted his chin.

"Hah. More like I was so bored, I had to stop or else I would've fallen asleep. You really didn't capture my attention at all, Uotani-san," he lied with a counterfeit yawn. "I've had better dances at my junior prom."

She smirked as she poked him dead center in the chest. "Bullshit." She pointed lower, making him blush. "Your little friend seemed to like it just fine."

"L-Little?!" he stammered. His chest was heaving up and down with the exertion of their wild dancing. He swiped at his forehead to capture the little beads of perspiration that strung pearl necklaces along his hairline. "For your information, I'm far from little."

Amidst her breathless tittering, Hatsuharu looked around. The club was thinning out. Even the flirty Rin lookalike was gone. There was more breathing room with all of the new empty space. He took a deep breath and exhaled in relief. He loved clubbing, but after a while, the crowds became too hot and stifling.

A flash of cherry blossom pink snatched the corner of his eye. He craned his neck to catch that familiar sight again. It was Megumi, Uo's friend, running towards them. Her other friend, Chie, was following at her heels, but there was no sight of the diminutive Jenny.

"Uo-kun! Haru-kun!" Megumi arched her back to place her hands on her knees once she reached them. Her body heaved up and down with the force it took her to gasp for air. Jade green eyes flashed up at them apologetically.

"Sorry guys," Megumi offered with a weak smile. Chie ran up to them, bowing and apologizing. Uo had some colorful words for her friends.

"Jenny-chan ran into her ex-boyfriend and they really got into it. We had to back our girl up, you know that, Uo-kun!" Chie argued defensively.

"Why didn't you come find me at the bar?" Uo snapped. "I would've been there to kill the bastard. Where's Jenny-chan anyway?"

"She left. We wanted her to stay and dance with us, just have a good time. You know how crazy their relationship is. She keeps going back to him and he treats her like shit."

"Please don't tell me she left with that douche."

"No, no. We called a taxi for her and she went home. I guess we should've called her cell to make sure she made it home safe." Chie and Megumi exchanged worried glances.

"Well, let's get outta here," Uo sighed as she looked around at the stragglers. They were all covered in glitter and their hair was plastered in strange shapes with sweat. Hatsuharu saw her self-consciously touch her hair. She was probably worried that she looked a hot mess, just like those late night partiers. She needn't have worried too much. Her makeup was a little melted from the heat and her hair was wild, but she still looked so tempting. He had to severely restrain his hands from pulling her in close to him again.

"Oh, definitely!" Chie agreed with a vigorous nod of her head. "We were worried about you too, you know," she added hastily. "We actually saw the two of you a few minutes ago. We would've approached you guys, but you and Haru-kun looked pretty cozy," she purred with a wicked grin.

Uo's face filled with blood. The sight made Hatsuharu smile. "You're really dead, both of you," she threatened the giggling girls. She linked arms with them. "C'mon. Let's get out. I really need a smoke dammit."

Hatsuharu followed the chain of ladies out of the nightclub. The bright neon sign for the club shone over them as they stumbled onto the curb. He looked up. The sky was quickly transforming from black to various shades of blue. Daybreak would be on its way in mere hours.

"Wow, it's late." Megumi faked a yawn. "Isn't it, Chie-chan? We'll head over to Jenny-chan's and check up on her. Sound good?"

Uo nearly spit out the lit cigarette she had bummed from a nearby straggler. "What about me?! I want to see Jenny-chan too!"

"Oh, no, please let us take care of it," Megumi insisted with a barely suppressed giggle. She turned to address Hatsuharu. "Haru-kun, you should escort our Uo-kun home, make sure she gets there safe," she said with a conspiratorial wink.

"Megumi-kun!"

But Megumi and Chie quickly flagged down a nearby taxi and dashed into the car's interior.

"Some friends," she muttered bitterly. Her eyes traced the path of the vanishing taxi.

"They have a point," Hatsuharu concluded as he dragged her over to a cab. "I should get you home safe."

"NO!"

Hatsuharu looked down at the iron grip he had on her wrist, then up into her alarmed face. Was he hurting her? He loosened his grip to make sure she was comfortable. "What do you mean, no? It's time to go home and sleep this off."

She looked down in what seemed like embarrassment. "…I can't go home. It's just not a good idea."

"What if you came home with me?" he said quickly before he could really process what he was saying.

"What?!" Uo shrieked wildly. "That's not happening, not in this lifetime. I don't want you to take advantage of me!"

"Oh, stop. It's late, and you're drunk, and it's too late to be fighting like this. Just come home with me and sleep this off at least. I'm not going to touch you. No offense, but you're not really my type."

"None taken. The feeling's mutual," she managed to hiss from between tightly gritted teeth. Uo paused. He knew what was on her mind. She was being too proud. Or perhaps she didn't want to seem easy… He watched as she silently weighed her options.

It was time to end her indecision. He gripped up her wrist once more and pushed her into a waiting taxi cab. Hatsuharu slid himself into the seat next to her.

"What the fuck, Ha—?!"

He turned to face his dancing partner. The time for playing nice was over. He sensed that she knew this too as she looked into his determined eyes.

"You're coming home with me, Uotani-san. Deal with it."

She bit her lip and glared at him. He could practically hear her cursing him out in her mind.

But to his relief, the fight left her face as she sighed with frustration and surrender.

"…Okay."


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

* * *

"Well, here we are."

As soon as the clichéd sentence ran from his lips, he winced in embarrassment. It was such a hackneyed, tacky thing to say, and he wanted to be anything but typical. Cool, maybe. Confident, definitely. But not tacky, and certainly not clichéd.

Hatsuharu closed the door as he walked in behind Uo. He stooped down to remove his shoes, while she resorted to carelessly kicking off her demon heels and letting her feet feel the toasty hardwood floor. He looked around in what he hoped was a casual way to make sure there was nothing suspicious or embarrassing poking out from neglected corners of his apartment.

He usually kept a tidy space. Hatsuharu was already a space cadet, completely forgetful, and prone to getting lost all of the time. He didn't need to add slovenly to his list of character flaws. But today, his small dwellings were slightly out of order. To his slight horror, he noticed leftover dishes on the kotatsu. More in depth inspection revealed that clothes were scattered in a frenzy all over the floor. His futon was a crumpled heap of thick blankets.

But Uo didn't notice. No, she didn't mind at all. She was twirling around his apartment as if she were five years old and showing a gaggle of laughing adults how dizzy she could make herself.

"Why don't you stop spinning? You might make yourself throw up, and I'd rather not have my place smell like barf." His tone was joking to the blonde, but he had to admit that he was more than a little concerned about her dizziness level. She was six sake shots intoxicated, and who knew how much she had drunk before he ran into her.

Uo finally stopped spinning, but not before issuing a drunken laugh and training unfocused eyes on Hatsuharu. "You're a baby," she slurred.

He came up to her and placed steadying hands on her shoulders. Definitely drunk. "Take it easy," he murmured. "Why don't you have a seat. I'll get you something to drink." He guided her to the kotatsu and removed a wayward shirt on a spot of the floor to make room for her to sit. Once she was settled in, he made his way to the fridge. "What would you like? Water? Ginger ale? Tea?"

"I'd really like some champagne." The response seemed to amuse her greatly, because she began cackling like she was front row at the most entertaining comedy show in the world.

He popped up from his earlier hunching stance over the fridge's contents. Her response made his eyebrows disappear into his shaggy mane. "Very funny. You're not getting one more drop of liquor tonight."

It was a wonder that Uo was being so cheerful. When he pushed her into the taxi cab earlier, he thought he had the upper hand with her. But her compliance soon gave way to her usual stubbornness. She had several choice colorful words for him once the cab driver sped in the direction of his house. But he held tight to the sassy girl and told her in no uncertain terms that there was no other logical choice. Like it or not, going back to her house wasn't an option so late at night, staying with Tohru at Shigure's house was also a no go, and Hana had enough on her plate with her team of siblings at her own home. It would be in her best interest to crash at his place and at least sleep it off before heading back home.

Uo knew that he was right, but that didn't stop her from muttering obscenities and being a sullen brat the rest of the cab ride to his home. But her mood seemed to change once they made their way to his modest dwellings. Now she was acting like they were best pals. The sudden switch in personalities was a bit jarring, but he supposed it was better than being resented.

"Well, if you're not going to drink anything, why don't we go to bed?" he suggested, making his way over to the smashed Uo. He must've been a comedian and not even known it from the way she guffawed loudly at his innocent suggestion.

"There's no way I'm crawling into bed with you, smashed or not," she hiccupped between giggles.

Hatsuharu couldn't help but roll his eyes. She was hopeless. Gone was the cool, sultry Uo, and a clown was sitting in her spot as her replacement. "I didn't mean it that way," he intoned patiently. "You can take the futon. I'll sleep with my head on the kotatsu. It's actually pretty comfortable once you get the handle of it." He could attest to that statement, having studied late into the night with his legs buried deep under the toasty kotatsu and falling asleep while doing so.

"Boooooorrrrriiiiinnnnggggg," she droned on. "The night is still young, y'know. Why don't we play a game?" Her eyes dashed around his apartment. "Don't you have any board games? Or a deck of cards? We could play Rich Man Poor Man."

"I think you need more players for Rich Man Poor Man," he rationalized to Uo as he found himself sitting cross legged beside her. "And unfortunately, I don't keep any board games. None that are suitable for only two players anyway. Aren't you tired? Get some rest. The sun will be coming up soon, and I'm sure you don't want to miss work."

"Hmmm," she replied. Her eyes fell unsteadily upon his face. An epiphany finally struck her from the way her eyes gleamed and a smile splashed onto her face. "I know! Why don't we play Truth or Dare?"

The way her voice rolled over the immature game made it seem like it was the best suggestion in the world. Surely she was praising herself in her head as a natural genius.

"Truth or Dare? Isn't that for horny preteens? It could get boring fast." His eyes scanned his surroundings. "We're not in public so that renders Truth or Dare pretty tame compared to other party games."

"Not when I used to play!" Uo rhapsodized, eyes lost in dreamy memories. "When I was a Yankee, I would play with my fellow gang members. It was always such a fun time!"

"G-Gang members?"

"Oh yeah!" she replied sunnily, as if everyone were in a gang and this phenomenon was a natural occurrence. "We would play to pass the time sometimes between casing people's houses. All types of dares. Like, 'Go bash this person upside the head with your metal pole' or, 'Go threaten this little kid.' Fun times, I tell you!"

"Uh…. What?" It took him a while to process all of the new information. _What kind of person do I have inside of my house?_ he wondered with faint horror and more than a little dash of panic.

Uo laughed. "Oh yeah, real fun times!"

 _Time to change the subject,_ he strategized, sweatdropping profusely. "What I'm really curious about," he said, folding his hands over the kotatsu, "is where you learned how to dance like that."

She blinked once in confusion. "Dance like what?"

 _Don't tell me she doesn't remember…_ The memory of their bodies curling together on the sweaty dance floor brought a flush to his face. To hide his reaction, he scurried to the fridge and fished for a bottle of beer. Hey, just because he wasn't going to give Uo another drop of alcohol didn't mean he couldn't drink any himself. Once he found a tall-necked amber beer bottle slick with condensation, he brought it back to his previous seat. Luckily it was a twist top, so he was able to busy himself with opening the beer bottle to avoid looking into her eyes. The memories just wouldn't disappear.

Hatsuharu raised the beer bottle and took three long gulps of the bittersweet concoction. It tunneled down his throat so smoothly, he nearly moaned as he slammed the bottle down hard. But Uo was still waiting for him to elaborate, so he took a deep breath before speaking.

"You know, when we danced together at the nightclub," he supplied, hoping it would jog her memory. He didn't like the idea of just him being all flustered at the thought of them grinding. He gave her a friendly grin, hoping his true feelings weren't too transparent. "I never would've guessed that you had it in you. You're a great dancer."

With a blush, Uo looked down. _Ah, so she does remember,_ he realized with relief. Her embarrassment made him feel a lot better. Grinning even more, he took another sip of beer.

"What made you think I didn't have it in me?" she questioned him with a flush in her cheeks.

"Maybe I don't know you so well. Actually, scratch that. I know for a fact that I don't know you that well. But still, what a shock it was to see you dance. Definitely wouldn't have expected that from a tomboy Yankee thug," he laughed.

"Oh, just wait, Hatsuharu-kun. I have many more tricks up my sleeve." Her voice turned into a sexy purr as she leaned forward and snatched the beer from his grasp. She took a long, slow gulp as he watched in shock.

 _Did she… just…?_ He gulped loudly. If she was seriously hitting on him, then she was too far gone to make any rational decisions. It was time for bed. "Okay, enough of that," he said hastily as he stood. He reached out for the beer, but she kept it out of hand's reach from him with a teasing smirk. "It's time for bed, Uotani-san. I mean it." He tried to inject some paternal reason into his voice, but all she did was laugh in his face. _Dammit… If only I were her senpai… Then maybe she'd listen._ But he knew she wouldn't listen to reason even if he were ten years her senior. She followed her own whims with selfish abandon. She couldn't be controlled.

"I told you not to call me Uotani-san! I know I'm your senior and all, but the way you say my name makes my skin itch all over," she grumbled. "Call me Uo-chan, or Uo-san if you insist on being so stuffy."

"Sure… Uo-san." He tried her nickname on his tongue and found that he liked the way it sounded much better than Uotani. "I can do that."

"Great. Now that that's out of the way…" She made her way to her feet and gulped down all of the frosty contents of his prized beer. It nearly made him cry. But she only smirked as she slammed the empty bottle on the table. "I will tell you how I learned to 'dance like that,' as you so eloquently said."

She paused for dramatic effect. "When I was a Yankee, I'd sneak into the nightclubs with my gang. Sometimes using fake IDs. Most of the time, by sheer force and muscle." Uo stopped to flex her toned bicep. Another laugh escaped her lips. "We would clear the dance floor and just dance all night, drinking all of the booze we wanted. But a lot of the time, we'd just pick fights."

At this part of her story, she almost looked bashful. "Not a past I'm proud of. I did so many unspeakable things. Just because I had a huge chip on my shoulder and I was angry at the world. But now, things are better. When I met Kyoko-san and became friends with Tohru-chan… They really changed my life for the better. It sounds so cheesy but it's really true."

He sat there, entranced by her story. "I guess I don't have as elaborate a story as you," he began. Her outpouring of emotions was moving. "But I guess I relate to you… being angry at the world and having a huge chip on my shoulder and everything. My home life wasn't all that… stable. I guess you could say it was cursed. I was lucky I had my cousins to lean on when shit got rough.

"Starting when we were first years in high school, Momiji-kun and I would sneak out to nightclubs. I guess we were crafty that way. A lot of people let us get away with it," he reminisced with a laugh. "But we'd dance and dance. I'd drink and I'd trick Momiji-kun into drinking the 'happy juice.'" Just remembering how drunk Momiji would get made Hatsuharu break out into joyous laughter. "When I'm dancing in a crowd, I just feel so alive. No one knows me. No one knows my past, or my present. I'm just another face and anyone I dance with is just with me in that moment. That's it."

"Was I just someone with you 'in the moment'?"

The question sounded almost serious, even though Uo was beaming at him. The query took him aback.

"What was that?" Hatsuharu asked, even though he heard her perfectly the first time. He just wanted to make sure his hunch was right.

Her wild hair swooped low over her face. "Was I just someone to dance with? Just someone to have fun with? You use me once and that's it?"

 _Woah,_ he thought. It was time for a beer. Things were getting too serious for him now. He shuffled over to the fridge once again, this time plucking out two beer bottles before he headed back.

He wasn't sure why Uo was getting so emotional. There was no way she could like him… right? He wanted to assure her that no, he danced with her because he wanted to, he felt close to her and he wanted to bridge that frosty gap between them. But he wasn't sure how.

"Truth or Dare?"

Uo seemed stunned. She was looking at him as if he'd sprouted beer bottles for arms. He decided to crack open a beer and guzzle down the contents before Uo got her hands on his bottle. Again.

"What?"

"I said, Truth or Dare? Or does this game not ring a bell for you. You were the one who wanted to play this dumb game, remember?"

"It's not a dumb game." A pause. "Truth."

"You're being awfully safe, Uo-san."

"No, I really don't think so."

"I'm not gonna go easy on you just because you shared a few mushy stories with me, y'know."

She flashed him a grin. She enjoyed the challenge. "I know. Likewise."

Hatsuharu took a deep breath as he wondered how close he was to playing with fire and getting burned. But he had to know. Memories of his awkward encounter with her and her friends flashed through his mind. Something she said to one of her friends to refer to him… to their relationship… It bothered him. He had to know what the deal was.

"Am I really just a "friend of a friend" to you, Uo-san?"

Reacting to her puzzled expression, he elaborated, "When, ah… Megumi-san was whining about how you were holding out on them in terms of introducing me to your friends, you said that I was just a friend of a friend. And I was wondering if that was true or not. Hence why I asked you this question for Truth."

Uo paused for what seemed like forever. In response, he grabbed for the second beer bottle, opened it up, and drank the contents quickly. The drunker he was, the better. He couldn't believe how uncool he just sounded. He could feel how beet-red his face was getting, even his ears. Hopefully she would assume he was flushing with the alcohol he was consuming so rapidly.

"Are you really just…. a friend of a friend," she repeated in a daze. Certainly it was to buy more time for her to answer this bold question. "Well, what can I say? You are Tohru-kun's friend, are you not? And she was the one who introduced you and Momiji-kun to me and Hana-chan. But it's not like we were close. You know that. You wasted a great opportunity, Haru-kun."

Her answer, while honest, still stung him a bit to hear. Even so, he felt himself brighten with her use of his nickname.

"Looks like it's my turn now. Truth or Dare?" she asked him.

He pondered the question as if it were the most important question of his life. "Dare," he challenged with a wicked grin.

Immediately, he knew that was the wrong answer to give. Her Cheshire Cat grin spelled nothing but trouble. "I dare you to drink that whole bottle of champagne there," she jeered as she thrusted her thumb back to the still open fridge.

"There's no champagne in the—ohhh." He interrupted his denial with a heaving sigh. True to her word, when he looked back at the fridge he carelessly forgot to close, a honey blonde bottle of champagne stood glinting in the light of the kitchen.

The tick tock of the clock drummed a menacing beat in his body. Time melted away and stripped everything but him, Uo, and that menacing bottle of champagne. The cursed bottle was actually an early birthday gift from Shigure. It was a rare, expensive bottle that Hatsuharu was saving for a special occasion. He had that bottle stashed in his fridge, unopened, for what seemed like ages. And with a careless dare, the virginity of that precious champagne was being threatened. Once a bottle of champagne was opened, he knew it was best to finish it. Otherwise, it would just grow old, stale, and flat. None of the qualities that a fine French champagne deserved.

But the dare just stood there between them, and Uo wasn't going to say, "Just kidding!" and giggle maniacally. No, she looked dead serious. She even looked puzzled that he wasn't going through with it.

"Are you chicken, Haru-kun?" she teased.

Uh-oh. The old, "Are you chicken?" question egging him on. The oldest phrase in the book to make someone "man up" and do something dangerous, stupid, or both.

"Are you crazy?" he asked her incredulously. "There's no way I can finish that champagne. It's a suicide mission."

Uo clucked loudly and flapped her arms, mimicking a chicken. The way she laughed maniacally only added the fuel to the flame.

"That's it!" he bellowed. With heavy steps, he stomped his way to the prized bottle of champagne. He could see his golden reflection in the fizzy alcohol as he picked it up. It was a big, heavy bottle. Drinking just a fourth of it would put him in a coma.

 _Nobody calls me chicken and gets away with it,_ he thought as he uncorked the bottle. It made a satisfying pop as the air moved in on the champagne bottle's neck. The liquid courage flowing through him made him lift the devil bottle to his lips. All sound, even what sounded like Uo's concerned voice, faded away as he started to drink.

At first, he felt fine. Good even. The champagne was surprisingly sweet, and the bubbles tickled his nose in a funny but pleasing way. _Hm. My cousin sure has good taste in liquor,_ he thought as he forced the sweet champagne down his throat.

Next, his throat started to itch and burn. _Hm. What an odd symptom_ , he reflected drunkenly. But he had to fulfill his mission, even if it was a Fool's errand. He would not be called a chicken, ever.

But then his vision started to flicker in and out, and he found that he had moved past playing with fire. He was now fully engulfed in it.

"Hatsuharu-kun, stop!"

Uo had jumped up and ripped the bottle out of his iron grip. His mouth separated from the passionate liplock with the champagne bottle with a small _pop!_ She slammed the bottle on the counter, whipped around, and singed him with the most hateful, burning glare. It surprised him. He was just trying to fulfill the dare. He tried to tell her this, but his tongue was twisting all over itself and not letting him form coherent words.

"You idiot! I was just kidding, dammit! I didn't think you were stupid enough to follow through!" she shouted. "You could've gotten hurt! You could've died! What the hell is wrong with you, dumb Hatsuharu-kun?!"

"Are you crying?"

Uo looked shocked as he brushed his hand over her cheek. Indeed, the hypothesis ended up being correct. His hand was slick with her lukewarm tears. Her eyes were so wide with concern with him, and her lashes were threatening to fall off. _Fake lashes_ , he guessed. The rest of her makeup wasn't faring so well either: Her red lipstick was dribbling off of her face and her cheeks were streaked black with mascara. But he still wanted her.

The realization caught him completely by surprise. He hoped she didn't realize how hard his heart was beating as he caressed her face gently. Surprisingly, she didn't stop him. She leaned into his touch and issued a soft moan.

That sound really threw him off, but he wanted to hear more from her lips. His thumb moved lower to press into the soft space between her top and bottom lip. Those lips were so soft, so red, so juicy… like a ripe apple. He desperately wanted to know if her lips tasted as sweet as they looked.

But even in his intoxication, he felt himself hesitate. If he kissed her and she slapped him in response, it would be more than a blow to his pride. Their tentative friendship would be torn to pieces. Gone in an instant. Any hopes of becoming more of a true friend, and less of a "friend of a friend" would be completely decimated.

"If I dared you to kiss me, would you?" he asked in a hoarse whisper. The question made her look up into his eyes with a myriad of emotions. He liked the way her ocean-blue eyes looked even more blue when he saw her up close.

"You really are a pervert," she rasped. But she licked her lips anyway and pressed up against him.

The contact was enough of an invitation for him. He pressed his lips to hers as his arms snaked around her waist. She melted into him with another moan.

Their bodies melted together: her curves mixed with his edges. It made him feel good, but confused at the same time. Uo was supposed to be an acquaintance. A "friend of a friend," just like she'd defined their relationship so casually at the club. What they were doing was blowing any chance of that friendship. But the champagne that swam through his veins, in combination with the many spirits he'd consumed, didn't care about their budding friendship. Instead, he wanted to make Uo his next drink.

She panted heavily when they broke away for air. In her eyes was a question, one that he knew but didn't want to address just yet. But she was his perfect mirror: the same look in her eyes, same breathless expression. They were more alike than he'd realized, and that was what made all of this so scary.

"I can stop if you want. I'm sorry, Uo-san."

It pained him to say the words. If he listened really closely, he could hear the lascivious Black Haru cursing in the background. _But I have to reel us both in_ , he realized with a sigh. It wasn't just his relationship he was messing up. It was Uo's friendship with him and her feelings about their relationship that he was tainting with his lust. He couldn't afford to mess things up. They would undoubtedly regret it in the morning and things would just be too weird between them.

Right?

A peony pink flush bloomed in Uo's cheeks. Her black spaghetti strap dress was twisted all over her body, flashing more thigh than she was probably comfortable with. The sight made him groan. She was so tempting and she didn't even have to lift a finger to tease him. He wanted to bite her lip as he threw her on his futon and… He had to shake his head to rid himself of the devilish thoughts, but they persisted.

Instead of answering his apology, Uo raised her hand to the corner of his eye. She rubbed hard, then pulled her finger to her own face for inspection.

"You wear makeup?" she asked with a shy giggle. Indeed, her finger was marked with a faint trace of black kohl, the same kohl he'd applied so artistically earlier that night to pay homage to a handsome male K-pop star he admired.

"It's called guyliner," he insisted with a smirk.

Uo laughed softly, and before he knew it, their lips were touching again. This time, their earlier hesitation was gone, replaced with pure longing and calculated lust. He deepened their kiss as she coiled a long leg around his waist. He couldn't help gyrating his hips against her as he pressed her hard against the wall.

"Let's go to…" Her voice trailed off. Her bashfulness made him chuckle. She was an odd one, this Uo. Part dancing maven, part saucy Yankee, part loyal friend, and part shy lover.

"My pleasure," he purred. He effortlessly carried her over to his rumpled futon and threw her on her back before he covered her up with his body.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

It took a considerable effort to open his eyes, but he managed to crack them open in spite of the bright sunlight streaming through his windows. With a hiss resembling a cranky vampire reacting to the light, he squeezed them shut once more, this time raining his arm over his shut eyelids for that perfect darkness.

A headache was dully stabbing his brain however, and he knew he would have to get up and face the matter. Plus he had to pee and his throat was rough and dry. So he flung his arm away from his face with a disgruntled groan and sat up.

It wasn't too hard to figure out the cause of his symptoms. A half-opened bottle of champagne sweated on the kitchen counter, and amber bottles of beer littered the kotatsu. His apartment was even dirtier than he remembered to his shock. Clothes were spilled all over the floor, and even his coat rack had gotten caught up in the storm.

Memories of last night came flashing back to him in jagged pieces that didn't seem to fit together neatly in a perfect narrative. He remembered going to the nightclub and drinking by himself to forget Rin. He ran into Uo and her friends… Uo and he played Truth or Dare…. Right? And then they danced together…? He shook his head. No, the order didn't make any sense. And what had happened after? Why had Uo come to his apartment? Did she leave?

A splash of gold caught the corner of his eye.

"No….," he said weakly to himself as his eyes travelled over her sleeping face.

Uo was sleeping right next to him, on her side, curled up in a fetal position. She started to snore lightly, which would've been more humorous if he weren't completely naked beside her.

She looked so peaceful, just lying there, deep in sleep. In contrast, he was anything but calm as he truly let the weight of the situation press upon him. Hatsuharu flopped back onto the futon with a low groan. This had not turned out well, not in the slightest.

He had hit the nail on the head earlier: getting involved with Uo, as funny and beautiful as she was, would be nothing but trouble. But in a champagne-fueled delirium, he had decided that the payoff was worth the risk. Now, with a raging hangover and nothing to clothe his modesty besides his frumpy bed sheets, the consequences of his actions were more glaring than ever.

He looked over at his bedmate again. Here he was, going crazy over her, and she was sleeping with no idea of how conflicted he felt. It was bad enough that he was still in love with Rin. Now he had to throw in a one-night stand with Uo to further complicate matters.

Yes, it was fun and yes, it was good. But he knew that their drunken escapades were the wrong type of fun. He was supposed to offer her a place to crash, nothing more. Their wild night was supposed to go no further than harmless dancing and flirting.

Now there was no way they could return to their normal stations in life. Even if they vowed to forget it happened, even swore each other to secrecy, the action had happened. There were no repeats in life. Hatsuharu longed for a repeat, a second chance.

Memories of their night came back to him in waves. The details of their time together were cloaked in shadows. Sweet nothings and confectionary kisses paired with a frenzy, a tough darkness, and a bitter rawness that took both of them aback. They were both so rough with each other, as evidenced by the stinging pain of nails that sliced through the skin of his back. On her creamy shoulders, he spotted faint bite marks.

 _Jesus. Did I try to literally consume her?_ he wondered with faint horror. He had to close his eyes to block out the sight of her soft, sleepy smile with the evidence of his rough treatment of her body.

He had to pee really bad, but he didn't want to risk waking Uo. At least not without a plan.

 _What if I sneak out…? No, this is my apartment, it'll look suspicious if she wakes up in a strange place. She would probably freak out… Dammit. There's no other options. I have to just face her._

He lifted his body mere centimeters at a time from his space beside her so that she could sleep in peace. Once she woke up, she wouldn't be getting much rest. Hatsuharu shuddered to think of what new kinds of torture Uo would enact on him once she caught sight of him naked in bed with her.

Several minutes later, he exited the bathroom as quietly as he could and hesitantly walked up to her. Sleepiness overtook him suddenly; it had been a long night filled with very little sleep. In defeat, he crumpled silently onto the futon, replaced the covers, and settled in next to her.

 _Maybe if I sleep on it, everything will be okay,_ he thought as he slowly closed his eyes.

But next to him, the snoring Uo became a fully conscious one.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

* * *

Slowly, slowly, Uo grunted as she moved around in bed. Her eyes were still closed as she stretched her arms wide. She nearly missed Hatsuharu's head, but he ducked just in time.

With a sleepy yawn, her eyes snapped open. She blinked a few times. Then she cast her eyes around the new surroundings, undoubtedly confused.

Until she looked over at Hatsuharu and all confusion vanished.

Her look of shock soon turned to a cocktail of emotions. She snapped the sheet open to look down at her naked form, then back at the equally naked Hatsuharu. Back at her body. Back at Hatsuharu.

He could see her connecting the dots rapidly in her brain despite the hangover she must've been feeling.

Anger, embarrassment, and indignation rang through her voice as she screamed and pushed him out of the futon onto the hardwood floor.

"Ahhhh!" she cried shrilly as she ducked back under the covers with a blush covering every bit of skin on her.

"Uo-chan-!" His voice fell flat in his vocal chords. There was nothing he could do or say that would make the situation any different. They had slept together. Certainly they didn't sleep together platonically and innocently like they had both planned.

What a way for Uo to wake up in the morning. With a hangover and a perfect stranger beside her, in a strange apartment.

"How could you do this to me?!" She popped back from under the covers to grip him up by his black studded collar. Uo shook him back and forth so violently, he felt as if he could throw up.

"Ah! Uo-chan, please calm down-!"

"Uo-chan?! Uo-chan?! Since when did you get so familiar with me?! Just because we slept together doesn't mean you can call me that so shamefully! Oh, God," she groaned. "We slept together. We slept together. Omigod, this can't be happening. This can't be real." She paused to shudder as her eyes widened in a mixture of mortifiction and abject horror.

Uo's face turned raspberry red as her eyes unintentionally dipped low below his hips. "Why are you just sitting out naked in broad daylight like that?! Put some damn pants on or something! I don't want to see that shit so early in the morning!" she cried as she blocked her eyes with the crook of her elbow.

"O-Okay," he assented as he found his discarded boxers, a crumpled black heap on the edge of the futon, and yanked them on hastily.

She paused, blushing even harder due to her own nakedness in the daylight. In the chaos, the bedsheet covering her body from his morning view had fluttered off. With a look of pure hatred, she threw herself onto the futon cover, and rolled herself up like sushi away from him.

"You're acting childish! I know you're upset. You think I planned this?!"

"Yes, I do," the stubborn, angry sushi roll replied with her back to him. "You're nothing but a sick pervert and this was all your doing. I should've never came home with you."

He gingerly approached her rolled up body and placed what he hoped was a comforting hand on what he guessed was her shoulder. She was unresponsive. Hatsuharu sighed. She was pissed at him, and for good reason too. He had to appease her somehow. Just because both of them were drunk didn't mean he couldn't take responsibility.

"Look, I know you're upset," he said softly. He knew he had to be gentle with her. It wouldn't do any good to curse and swear at her, or he might end up with a broken jaw. But more importantly, he just wanted to make things right with Uo. "I'm upset too, you know."

"I doubt it. I'm just another conquest, you damn player."

"Where are you getting this information that I'm a player?" In a daze, he shook his head to clear his mind. "Okay, forget it. Listen, you may not believe me, but I really am sorry, Uotani-san. I didn't mean to take advantage of you. I never planned this. It just happened. But what's done is done, and nothing we can do or say can change that. I wish I could, more than you know." In response to his gentle words, she slowly sat up. Her sushi roll encasing started to unfurl as she spun around slowly to face him.

 _God, she's beautiful._ The still rising sun ignited her tangled mane and lit it from within, and her lips were so swollen and even with her eyes diamonded with tears, and her makeup flaking from her face, she was still so gorgeous. It made his heart hurt to look at her.

He couldn't let himself fall for her type. She was rugged, a tomboy, a former Yankee with a dubious past. And most of all, she was Tohru's friend. But he couldn't deny how attracted he was to her. He wished he could stomp the warm feelings for her down, but it was a fool's errand every time he tried.

His hand came towards her hesitantly while she looked at him in a daze. Did she even see him at all? Did she know what she was doing to him? It didn't seem fair.

His palm finally, blissfully, made contact with the soft skin of her cheek. His thumb swiped at a tear making its way down her face. The tender feelings he harbored earlier turned to deep shame and regret. He hated seeing her cry. She was too spirited, too free and tough, for such weak tears. And he was the cause of them.

 _I'm the worst._

Her soft gaze hardened into anger. Her hand slapped his hand away roughly. Now her face was a contortion of what looked like pure unadulterated hatred. "Don't touch me!" she hissed.

"You weren't saying that last night," he countered bitterly before he could stop himself. It was a huge mistake. Her head looked like it would rotate all the way around her neck, the way she was glaring at him. Her eyebrow twitched as a deep vein throbbed on her forehead.

"I dare you to say that again, you motherfucker!" she shouted as she lunged for him. Yes, she was out for blood, but so was he as he felt an angry mask slip over his usually calm demeanor. He had tried to be patient and sensitive with her and she just threw all of his efforts to the ground.

His hands were quicker than hers this time. Her attempted punches were locked up in his rough grip by her wrists. "Oh, yeah," he taunted her as she struggled against him, face flushed with rage. "You were practically begging me to touch you all over."

"You damn liar! Take it back, motherfucker! I would never want a dyed haired freak like you to touch me, ever!"

In her eyes, he could see his new eyes, limpid pools of silver that caught the sunlight with a cruel glint. It was like he was a new person. "Then why did you say…" He changed his rough tone to a high falsetto, mimicking Uo poorly, "'Oh, Haru, don't stop. Touch me all over. I want you to—' Umph!"

She had broken free and slammed her fist into the top of his head. He saw stars blinking brightly in the darkness as he fell to his knees.

"Fuck! Uo-chan, what's your goddamn problem?!" he cursed as he nursed the throbbing goose egg sprouting from his scalp.

"You stole my virginity! Of course I'm pissed! Wouldn't you be?!" Uo shrieked wildly.

"W-What?" His dark, angry mood quickly dissipated as he watched her look away bashfully. Even through the red twinging her cheeks, her face took on an angry expression.

 _Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit… shit._

"Please tell me you're joking," he said weakly. Even her swiftest, most painful kick in his crotch couldn't compare to this twisting in his insides. He wouldn't blame her, not completely, if she delivered a crushing kick to his nuts.

"Does it look like I'm joking?!"

He looked at her in stunned silence. It could've been a lie that she was telling him to make him feel even more like crap. But that scared look in her eyes told the truth.

Immediately, he pitched his body forward and kowtowed in front of her kneeling form. "Forgive me, Uotani-san," he responded weakly around the large lump in his throat. "I… I didn't know. That's no excuse. I'm so sorry. I'll do whatever you want to make it up to you." He deepened his bow to let her know he was completely serious. "I'm sorry I freaked out on you. I'm just… really sorry. It was all a huge mistake." Hatsuharu bowed several more times before her. He knew this gesture was a paltry offer of apology to her. But what could he do? He couldn't give Uo her innocence back.

To his shock, she responded with, "….It's fine."

He looked up warily at her while she was still twisted in his comforter. Her eyes were soft blue pools he wanted to dive into. But he couldn't let himself get swept up in this limpid blue. Uo bit her lip almost shyly as she struggled to maintain eye contact with him.

"I hate to say it, but… you're right," she sighed, voiced ringed with regret. "We can't go back and fix this. What's done is done, and we can't change it." She shrank into her cloth encasing once more. "We had sex and we have to deal with the consequences. You and I both. No matter who started it, or what happened, I wasn't exactly telling you to slow down… The only thing we can do is try to make peace with the situation and move forward starting today."

He was still frozen in shock as she slowly stood up. The covers trailed behind her as she hunted for her slinky black dress. Her bra was twisted in a dark, lacy pool by the kotatsu, which she found after some effort. And her panties were even harder to find, but she didn't give up. She finally figured out their location after at least five minutes of serious hunting.

All the while, he could only stay locked in his bowing position. Icy blood ran through his veins. He feared another attack. Uo was a fierce fighter after all, and perhaps she was trying to delude him into safety. But all she said was, "I'm going to take a quick shower. Then I'm leaving. Can't miss work."

The door clicked shut behind her.

"Idiot, idiot, idiot," he droned on as he smacked his head into the floor with each word. How could he have been so callous when she had every reason to be upset? He had just committed the gravest mistake, taking away her first time.

She resurfaced fifteen minutes later. Her face was scrubbed clean of any melted traces of makeup, and her hair was still damp from the shower.

He couldn't look her in the eye. How could he?

"Don't be too hard on yourself, Hatsuharu-kun."

"How can I not be hard on myself? I took your virginity. Your first time is supposed to be special. Not while you're drunk, and not with someone like me," he murmured, voice breaking over his regret.

"Don't be so sentimental," she joked half-heartedly. "And stop bowing, you look stupid." But the joking tone, one that was supposed to be so bubbly and breezy, just fell flat. She couldn't even really look him in the eye as she pretended to brush imaginary lint from her wrinkled party dress. "I don't think I need to tell you that this stays between us," she said in a voice that hinted at what she would do to him if he ever squealed.

"Of course," he replied numbly, sitting up. He dared to dart his gaze over to her. Her shoulders were so hunched over with sagging disbelief as well as regret. It was hard to watch.

"We'll never speak of this again. I never want to hear of what we did from your mouth. The past is over and done with, and I just want to forget everything that happened."

"Everything," he repeated in a daze, with just a hint of a question in his voice. He hated to admit it, knowing the turmoil Uo was going through, but her words stung a bit. Despite the mess they'd gotten in, he didn't want to forget anything that happened between them.

"Yes," she said firmly, almost too firmly. Was she hesitating? He couldn't tell because he couldn't read her facial expressions. She'd whipped her back around too quickly. "And I never want to see you again." She paused. "I know that you'll make yourself scarce around me, as I will with you. Hopefully our paths don't ever cross again, but if they do, make sure you walk the other way."

He opened his mouth to reply, but she didn't give him enough time to. She left and closed the door firmly behind her.

The air buzzed with their tension as he made his way unsteadily to his feet. Just like that, it was over. The start of their friendship had fizzled out before it even really started. But he could feel a longing for her that definitely wasn't for just a friend.

"Arghhhh," he groaned as he held his head tightly. A headache was creating an earthquake in his brain again. Flashes of her disappointed, angry face swam through his memories. Unfortunately, those were the faces that would be the most prominent in his memories now.

Despite the pain he was feeling, he had to get himself ready for the day ahead. Even though it was a weekend, he wanted to go for a brisk jog and maybe outrun his feelings in the process.

His body protested even the thought of moderate exercise however, which made him flop back onto the futon on his back. He felt something hard and rectangular bite into his back. Hatsuharu sprang back up, turned around, and looked at the suspicious lump. When he pulled the futon and all of its layers all the way back, he saw the cause of the discomfort.

Uo had left her cell phone.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

The alarm from his cell phone blared loudly on, cutting through his vivid recollections of her. Hatsuharu folded his pillow over his ears and tried to escape by rolling onto his side. But it was no use. His hair, still damp from his long shower, brushed coldly against his brow as he snapped forward and shut off his alarm.

He clenched his teeth. "I guess it's time for school," he hissed to himself. His whole body was protesting even the thought of stumbling through the motions of going to his classes and acting like everything was fine. But he knew that school was important. Anything to get his mind off of her.

It was hard to believe that their crazy night together wasn't just a dream. He found her at their usual haunt, Blitz, the billiards bar in her seedy part of town. But even when he saved them from that thuggish attack from a sore loser, she still brushed him aside as though he were nothing.

Was he really nothing to her?

If that was true, and he was nothing to her, if he truly meant absolutely nothing to her, then he would have to disregard her as well. Treat her as if she didn't exist.

But as he went through the motions of throwing on his rumpled clothes and grabbing his backpack, he found that treating her like nothing was easier said than done.

"Forget her," he hissed to himself. The sudden pop of the toaster made him jump. Apparently he made toast. He had forgotten that he'd thrown in a slice of bread absentmindedly.

That was her superpower. She had the power to make him forget himself, when really he just needed to forget her.

His arm shot out by itself. His fist made a sharp crack against the wall.

"Dammit!" he shouted in frustration. The wall crumpled around the impact of his fist. His eyes swung over to the newfound hole.

"Well, Tanaka-sama isn't going to like that very much," he muttered to himself, thinking of the youngish, kindly, but spunky landlady. She didn't take any mess, and the repair fees for the damage would undoubtedly come out of his paycheck. No exceptions.

He snatched the toast from the toaster roughly. Upon closer inspection, he found that quite a bit of char had overtaken the once white bread.

It was no matter. Burnt toast was still food, and he was terribly hungry. He stuffed the crust into his mouth as he wrestled on his backpack and left.


	7. Chapter 7

Here's Chapter 7! Thank you, readers and reviewers. You're the best. On to the chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

* * *

"Helloooo~? Earth to Haru-kun? Hey!"

The sharp outcry on the last word made him jump nearly out of his skin. "Geez! Why don't you say that a little louder? I don't think all of Japan could hear you," he said out of the side of his mouth to his golden-haired companion. Hatsuharu looked around self-consciously, hoping that no one had seen him jump in such an uncool way. But the students were too wrapped up in their own lives to pay them much attention. This was their only break in the three hour class, and there was much to catch up on. Some students could be seen chatting animatedly in large groups, while others, like Hatsuharu and Momiji, were busy stuffing their faces with a quick snack or lunch during the interlude.

Hatsuharu looked down grimly at his slim pickings for lunch. Stumbling home at such a late hour hadn't brought out his culinary genius. Not that there was any culinary genius in him that he could claim whole-heartedly. His meal consisted of a few downtrodden riceballs with pickled plums in the middle that he had made messily a few nights ago. He wasn't even sure if they were still edible. He leaned in slightly to give the meal a covert whiff before daring to bite into one lopsided, half-heartedly made riceball. He sighed as he took one bite and placed the rest back down in his bento box. It was times like this that he truly missed Tohru's cooking.

Hatsuharu turned his tired eyes over to Momiji. The smiling boy hadn't changed much over the years. They were both college freshmen, but Momiji was still as innocent and sweet as a grade schooler. At the moment, his tea-colored eyes were round and wide as he looked back at him. His golden curls, the envy of many females and males alike, rippled down slightly over his forehead and down the nape of his neck. The shaggy-haired boy was due for a haircut, but his tousled curls made him look even more like a cherub.

Momiji just smiled back at him with such a sunny demeanor that it almost made him feel a regretful pang for snapping at him like that. He usually wasn't so short-tempered with the former Rabbit.

"What's gotten into you?" Momiji wondered as he took a hearty bite from his perfectly prepared ham and cheese crepe. He was quite the culinary maven these days, and didn't hesitate to show off his prowess with his unbelievably intricate bento lunches.

"Nevermind…" He trailed off to brush his bento box aside. He knocked his head once against the desk before folding his arms and letting his head rest. "Just tired… I guess. I've been pulling a lot of all-nighters lately. Gotta be more on top of things."

But he wasn't satisfied with that feeble excuse. Momiji leaned in close. He could smell the prosciutto on his breath, he was that close. "You don't fool me, Haru-kun," he singsonged as he poked Hatsuharu's cheek. "You're too mopey to be sleepy. And you've been mopey a lot lately. What's going on?"

"Arghhhhh. So tired. Just let it go, Momiji-kun. You're such a damn pest," he groaned in response as he buried his face deeper into his forearms.

"Waaahhh! Haru-kun isn't playing nice with me!" Momiji wailed. When he peeked out one gray eye, he saw that the overdramatic teen was wailing with genuine tears in his eyes. Hatsuharu let out a sigh. Momiji was hopeless.

"I want to go see Tohru-kun! She'll give me some love! I want to sit in her lap!" he chirped sunnily. He seemed to forget how devastated he was with Hatsuharu's crabbiness just moments before.

"Don't be stupid," Hatsuharu replied, straining to filter out any undue bitterness. He didn't have to take out his lovelorn frustrations on the poor kid after all. "Tohru-kun and Kyo-kun are busy planning their wedding. No need to bother them so much."

"Awww! But I wanna play with Tohru-kun!"

"Somehow, I don't think Kyo-kun would like that very much."

"I can't wait for the wedding!" he prattled on. It was confusing and exhausting all at once to keep track of all of Momiji's whims and moods.

His easygoing nature made him a great target for peer pressure. Momiji was incredibly trusting and naïve, as well as up for anything. It was so easy to get Momiji to sneak into nightclubs with him in high school because he truly did aim to please. But at the same time, his nature only made everyone want to protect him more, instead of fool him. He reminded Hatsuharu of that poor, foolish traveler in that story he told. No matter how much the foolish traveler was conned out of all of his possessions, he was just happy to give up until the very end. Hatsuharu's eyes softened. In the end, Momiji was more like a little brother to him than a cousin, and he would protect him until the end.

"It should be something else," Hatsuharu replied. He wasn't sure what else he could say. He looked up into the bright azure sky. White, gauzy clouds slid past slowly, and the sun was strong and bright.

Kyo hadn't wasted any time. As soon as Kyo and Tohru graduated high school, he immediately proposed to her as if he couldn't wait a single moment longer to make her his. The memory made Hatsuharu smile. Despite their conflicts, in the end he wanted his family to be happy. And nothing made Kyo happier than being with Tohru. She was his salvation, his muse, the love of his life, and his closest friend all wrapped into one. They had a pretty long engagement; it lasted for a couple of years now. Hatsuharu guessed it would be at least another year before they finally got hitched.

Momiji's palpable excitement was becoming contagious. Students around him were reacting to his positive vibes without truly knowing what Momiji was getting so excited about.

"I wanna wear a pretty dress!" Momiji cheered. A nearby male classmate whistled loudly, which drew forth a smattering of laughter. But the blond just smiled broadly as he rhapsodized about how Ayame would just have to make him a dress filled with taffeta, ribbons, lace, and tulle, and how it would be the most extravagant thing anyone had ever seen.

"I don't think you're supposed to upstage the bride," Hatsuharu cut in, but Momiji couldn't be reined in. He nearly had stars in his eyes as he basically sketched the idea out for his beautiful, one of a kind creation. Even some nearby female classmates were being roped in by his soliloquy. A couple of male students were intrigued by the thought of adorable Momiji looking even more like a girl.

Listening to Momiji prattle on about how beautiful and darling his dress would be made his stubborn heart soften. It was a much needed distraction from his struggles.

He felt grateful for Momiji in that moment. Not only was he a great friend, but he was a source of strength. Despite his childish ways, he was capable of being quite profound and wise beyond his years. He knew that Momiji missed Hatsuharu so much now that he was no longer living in the Main house. Their only source of prolonged contact was during school hours after all. Now that he had his own apartment, Hatsuharu lamented with more than a few drops of guilt on his conscious that he hadn't kept close ties with his cousins, not like he used to.

Moving away from the Main house had been a difficult choice, but a necessary one. Living in the same home as his ex-girlfriend Rin had just become too unbearable. Seeing her face every day after their brutal breakup was like living in a special type of purgatory. He couldn't move on because he had to keep seeing her, yet there was no possible way that they would reconcile and piece together the jagged pieces of their relationship. Every time he tried, he just got sliced into tiny pieces.

Of course, he had to convince his mother to allow him to live on his own. He was still her baby after all, just a child. She was rightfully concerned for his well-being. But she was slowly but surely persuaded to loosen the reins. But the most important person he had to gain acceptance from was their God, Akito. Her opinion was the only one that truly mattered after all. Hatsuharu was convinced that Akito wouldn't allow it. Akito wouldn't want to let a single member of the Jyuunishi out of her sight.

But to Hatsuharu's relief and surprise, Akito approved the request. Their God had almost seemed dismissive and uncaring of Hatsuharu's wish to move out. She only had a few requirements. Attending the New Year's banquet every year was a must. Hatsuharu had to make periodic visits to the Main house. He was still essentially at Akito's beck and call. At a moment's notice, no matter what, he had to answer Akito's summons right away. No exceptions.

But now the curse was broken. The former members of the Jyunnishi were free to love and hug who they wanted. But Hatsuharu still felt linked to Akito. She was powerful. She ended so many relationships, just crushed them into the ground. Hatsuharu never forgot that. He was still deeply afraid of her, of her power and what she was capable of. He knew he owed her so much at the same time. Akito never once demanded that Hatsuharu move back into the Main house. He certainly was in her debt for that small but meaningful token.

"Are you even listening to me, Haru-kun?! Geez," Momiji pouted.

Hatsuharu blinked to clear the fog of his recollections and smiled at the disgruntled teen. "Of course. Pretty dress. Bows and all. See, I was listening," he protested with a teasing grin.

Momiji paused to scrutinize Hatsuharu in a way that made him feel like he was a deeply fascinating science project. "You're really not acting like yourself," he murmured. His sunny smile dimmed. Momiji's brow furrowed. "I just wish you'd confide in me like you used to."

"No need to be so melodramatic," Hatsuharu countered as he took a bite of his terrible riceballs. "I'm fine. Just tired. Really. You're reading too much into this." But while he said those words, he felt his insides twist up into infinity signs. It was no use. Momiji wasn't stupid. They used to be so close, and now Hatsuharu was hiding things from him. He rationalized that he wanted to spare Momiji's feelings. He was way too empathetic sometimes. Confiding in Momiji about his love woes wasn't really a good idea. He was too much of a bleeding heart to hear about such things. Plus he had a feeling that the former Rabbit just wouldn't understand. In Momiji's mind, everything was simple. Especially love. But Hatsuharu knew better. The world was a ruthless place. Things were more complicated than Momiji would make them seem.

It was ironic considering that Momiji had faced such demons in his own life as well.

Hatsuharu pressed his head to the desk, sliding his face towards the view of the sunny day. Only a few minutes of their break left. He could certainly stall and then class would begin again and that would be the end of it.

"Just don't get involved with females, kid. That's all I really have to say," Hatsuharu mumbled. It just came out before his mind could restrain his tongue.

Now that he thought about it, getting mixed up with Uo had changed his life. He wasn't so sure if it was in a positive way anymore. He thought back to that cold night, when she pedaled away on his bike so fast, it seemed as though she were trying to outrace time itself. Now he was left without a bike as well as a warm body to sleep next to at night. He could hardly call her his girlfriend, not even in the past tense. But thinking of her in terms of just a body was hard too, despite the carnal nature of their involvement. He shook his head slightly as if trying to fix his jigsaw puzzle thoughts together.

Apparently, Momiji heard him thinking out loud, because he raised his eyebrows knowingly with a cheerful grin. "Oh, I already know that, Haru-kun," he chuckled before turning to his golden crepe. He took a hearty bite. "That's why I only date men."

With a nod, Hatsuharu bit into his riceball. "Yeah, good. Only date—Wait, what?!" Momiji's matter-of-fact statement made Hatsuharu's voice break in half over the large clump of rice making its way down his throat. He stared in wide-eyed fascination at his cousin, who was looking cool and calm in the face of Hatsuharu's bewilderment.

Closing his eyes, Momiji chucked bashfully. "I thought you knew, Haru-kun. Don't look so shocked now."

 _But how could I have known?_ he couldn't help wondering. His eyes started watering as a result of his near-choking fiasco, so he grabbed his water bottle and took a large gulp. Sure, Momiji was very… feminine. He was more comfortable in a dress (or in a high school girl's uniform, in his days as a student at Kaibara High) than in slacks and a crisp shirt. But he really didn't think of Momiji's love life at length. He was so cute and sweet, and flirty with everyone, so it just wasn't clear what his preference was.

It really wasn't a big deal, but it was a sharp sting that Momiji didn't trust him enough to confide in him.

 _Or maybe you just neglected your own cousin, your best friend,_ another voice nagged him.

"What else are you hiding from me? A secret boyfriend or something?"

The blush igniting the blond's cheeks was so red, Hatsuharu could swear he felt heat radiating around him. Momiji stuffed the last of his crepe in one large gulp and chewed loudly. "Mmm, yummy crepe," he mumbled while avoiding Hatsuharu's probing stare.

"Lemme guess," he teased with a huge grin. Seeing Momiji so flustered was so cute. "Oh, God, if it's that snot-nosed punk Hiro-kun, I'm going to tear out my hair. Oh, c'mon, tell me. Don't make me guess. Do I know the guy? Gotta make sure he deserves you, after all."

"Well… I am seeing someone." Momiji murmured his next reply in a strangled tone. He bit his lip shyly. "I'm dating Megumi-kun. Hana-chan's younger brother."

"Wait, really?!" he exclaimed in shock. Hatsuharu hadn't met the younger Hanajima, but he remembered Hana showing Tohru and the others a picture of them together. Megumi was like her doppelganger: same dark features, same solemn expression. An unexplained chill rolled over Hatsuharu's back. He didn't want to admit it, especially since Momiji had found love with this guy, but Hana (and by proxy, Megumi) kind of gave him the creeps. There was definitely something supernatural about the girl, and most likely, the brother too.

"Well… that's great," Hatsuharu said, sweatdropping. "Just stay on his good side, all right? I don't want him to hex you or something." Another shudder upset his broad shoulders.

Momiji, still blushing, managed to giggle, albeit a bit self-consciously. "He's a good guy. He'd never hurt me," he smiled warmly.

"Well… if he does… hurt you, I mean… you'll tell me, right?"

Momiji looked at Hatsuharu in wide-eyed surprise. "Why wouldn't I, Haru-kun? You're my best friend."

"Really?" he asked in a strangled tone. He wished he didn't sound so pitiful, but he found that hard to believe. Sure, it was a double standard. Hatsuharu could hide things from Momiji (like his secret relationship with Uo), but he expected full honesty from Momiji. He was happy for Momiji. Really. But he worried that if Momiji could keep his love life a secret from him, who knew what else he could be hiding. What if he wasn't as happy as he said he was?

But looking at his smile…

It was different.

Momiji's open and breezy nature attracted so many to him. Everyone wanted to be his friend. It made Hatsuharu jealous at times, even now. Especially back when they were all cursed, Hatsuharu was so closed off. He barely showed any emotion, except when Black Haru came to the surface. His aloof nature usually kept a pretty secure barrier around him. It was hard for him to make genuine friends. But Momiji, despite his hardships, was so open and honest. He had a natural gift for friendship. It was a talent he sorely lacked.

Momiji had an ocean of smiles for everyone he met, no matter their personality. But Hatsuharu knew when Momiji's smile was truly warm, and when it was just a farce. Their close bond just naturally made him in tune with the blond's emotions in a way that no one else quite knew.

The only one who ever brought that kind of warm, caring smile from him was Tohru.

And that smile, so warm and honeyed, was now beaming from Momiji's face.

At that moment, he understood.

"You love him," he murmured softly, almost in awe.

Momiji's smile deepened so much, a rare dimple popped up on his left cheek. His eyes softened and became dreamy. "Yeah. I really love him."

The professor's voice boomed over the din of the crowd. The students let out a collective groan, but he would have none of that, as evidenced by his no-nonsense tone. Everyone ambled back to their seats. A shuffle of papers, laptops being opened, and heavy textbooks being paged through formed a steady rhythm before fading into quiet as the professor resumed the class.

Hatsuharu quietly packed away his neglected lunch and opened up his laptop to take notes. But he couldn't get Momiji's words out of his mind for the rest of the day.


	8. Chapter 8

Please don't hate me too much for this chapter. (You'll see what I mean at the end.) ^^;;

It's such a labor of love to update this story. It's been a struggle, but thank you to those who are still reading, reviewing, and following _Champagne_. It's close to the end, and I couldn't have gotten this far without any of you. Thank you.

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket. All characters and plot are property of the talented Natsuki Takaya.

* * *

It was pointless.

Hatsuharu tried to force his tired, sore eyes open, but he just couldn't do it.

It was midnight. The salt and pepper-haired Sohma was stationed with his legs buried under the warm kotatsu. A haphazard stack of papers and textbooks made a Leaning Tower of Pisa on the wooden surface. It seemed ready to collapse at any moment. Before him, the blue light of his laptop burned into his already dehydrated retinas.

His paper was due tomorrow, and he knew he shouldn't waste time. But the blank space of his word processor wasn't exactly striking him with inspiration. He didn't even really care about this class anyway. It wasn't remotely attached to his interests.

But he took school pretty seriously. He knew he was lucky to not only have several scholarship opportunities, but his family was footing the bill too. The fact that his performance was slipping was making him feel on edge. But he was too tired and frustrated to get to work.

"Aaarghhh," he groaned as he gripped his scalp. "This calls for coffee. Need to focus."

But before he could emerge from his kotatsu fortress, he heard a clipped knock at the door.

He looked over at his phone. 12:07am. _Who could it be so late?_ he questioned himself with a speck of irritation. He posed cautiously, waiting tensely. Years of diligent martial arts training felt like it was coiled up in his limbs, really to ricochet out of his body at any moment. As dopey as he could be sometimes, he wasn't a complete dolt. A knock at the door at this time of night usually meant nothing good.

The next set of knocks came thrice in succession. It was a sound peppered with impatience and exasperation. The knocks rang through his sparsely furnished studio apartment.

He finally stood up and made his way to the source of the sound. He peered through the peephole to gauge how concerned he should be. _It could be any crazed nut_ , he reasoned.

When he saw the figure standing there in the illuminated hallway, he wondered if he was dreaming.

She was blonde, with long hair and piercing cerulean eyes that haunted his dreams.

Uo.

He blinked hard to reset his vision. This couldn't be happening.

But there she was, flesh and bones and breath and blood. And she was staring at the door in impatience, even peering into the other end of the peephole as though she could find out his whereabouts this way.

Hatsuharu could feel a tremor, both from nervousness and excitement, wave through his body as he unlocked the door and opened it wide to look directly into that heartbreaker's eyes.

Without greeting, the blonde former Yankee threw Hatsuharu's bike in front of him on the hardwood floor. The scrape of metal and gears scratched his ears.

"Here's your damn bike," she declared hotly with a scorching look, as though it really taxed her to return something that was rightfully his.

He couldn't help but to stare at her in a daze. His eyes were burned to a crisp from hours of staring into the blazing blue light from his laptop. Adding an impromptu visit from Uo was just another burning ember to the bonfire. His emotions were tinder fanning the fire of his frustrations. Now, his old flame was here to really burn him up, and he was really getting tired of being scorched.

"I gave it back. I told you I'd give it back to you. You didn't have to insist on me dropping it off in person," she huffed.

He groaned in mortification. He remembered everything now.

Hatsuharu went out drinking with some friends a few nights ago. Like Momiji, they remarked on how their buddy was so mopey. They proposed that they have a few drinks and perhaps find some cute girls to cheer him up. He dimly remembered fumbling with his cell phone at the bar, but nothing more. He only remembered thinking, _Damn, I shouldn't be getting so blackout drunk like this_ when he woke up the next morning.

The pieces came together now that he was faced with her unhappy expression.

"I'm sorry. I seriously don't remember making that call," he said with a slight wince as he scratched the back of his neck. How embarrassing. Now she probably thought he was trying desperately to see her. While he did want her in his life still, he knew when to take a hint. She was in love with Kureno, and nothing would change that.

Uo placed her hands on her hips with a grimace. "Well, now you got what you wanted. You got your bike back." She turned to her left. "I'm leaving now. I'm done. Now we have nothing more to say to each other."

Before the door swung shut, he reached out his hand automatically and grabbed her wrist. The sudden skin contact made Uo look over at him.

"Wait."

Uo swung her arm hard to try to fling his hand away but his grip just wouldn't loosen. He wanted to let her go. He had to let her go. She was already gone and moved on already, but he couldn't tell his fingers to uncoil from her wrist. He felt like he just couldn't let her leave. Not like this.

"Let me go!" she shouted roughly.

But he yanked her into his apartment before shutting the door.

He was marveling at the fact that he wasn't dead yet. She simply glared at him with a mixture of confusion, impatience, and anger.

"I don't want to make a scene out in the hallway," he said quietly. It was only partly true.

"Whatever. I'm done playing with you."

"Apologize."

The sound of his command made her turn around slowly.

"What did you just say to me?" she growled.

"I said apologize," he said, louder and more confidently this time. "You stole my bike. Whether you returned it or not doesn't make a difference. You still stole it."

A peal of crazed laughter stumbled from Uo's lips. "Apologize for what? You were the one who got me in that situation in the first place!"

He took a step closer. "No, you did," he seethed. "You picked a fight, I saved your ass, and I even helped you get away. Then you just show no remorse for your actions at all, I don't even get a thank you, and you just pedaled away on my bike. You took something really precious away from me, just ripped it out right from under me! And now you need to apologize for taking something that meant so much to me away, just like that! Just like it was nothing to you! Like it didn't even matter!"

He was left heaving and sweating slightly from his passionate speech. He felt his cheeks warm. The breath was knocked out of his chest.

Uo peered up at him intensely. He saw her jaw, which was held in such a tight clench, slacken. Her lips parted. His eyes immediately fell on her lips. Soft, soft lips. Feeling slightly disgusted with himself, he whipped himself around so that she could only see his back. He didn't want to show more emotion than he needed to. Even this outburst was too much.

"Now we're talking about much more than a dumb bike, aren't we now," she murmured.

"Shut up. What's it to you. You're just a damn no good Yankee thief," he grumbled.

"Look at me, dammit. You always do that."

His shoulders fell. He hadn't realized how tensely he held his body until he took a deep, shuddering breath.

"Do what?"

"You know damn well what you do. You show me some emotion, then you close yourself off and shut down. It's just so weird. Why do you do that? Look at me, Haru-kun."

Her words were like a magic incantation. He couldn't help but obey.

Uo was no longer defensive, tough, and angry. Instead, she looked defeated when their eyes touched. He gave her a longer inspection. Her hair was tied up in a low ponytail, with her customary sweep of bangs covering one eye. She wore a candy cotton pink sweater that showed off creamy shoulders. She looked so approachable, so soft. It was hard to look at her, but he struggled to maintain her intense gaze.

"That's not so hard, is it? Just look at me."

"Stop playing games with me, Uotani-san. It's tiring. You're really fucking with my head," he replied wearily.

Uo couldn't say anything in response. But he couldn't really chalk up her silence as a win. He just felt tired of it all. Now he wasn't sure what she was playing at.

"Do you really love him? Kureno-kun. Are you really in love with him?"

Without realizing it, he noticed that he literally had her backed up in a corner. He only realized it because he saw his bicycle from a distance at the door's entrance where she unceremoniously dumped it. He took another step closer. Now they were barely separated. His close proximity to her meant that he could hear her breathing. He could feel her body heat. He could smell her perfume.

Her eyes were a myriad of emotions. She looked alarmed and nervous, but there was also some unnamed feeling flickering across her features that he couldn't decipher now.

Her mask slid into place. Her face was all scorn and seriousness when she said, "I already told you my feelings."

Hatsuharu leaned in closer, feeling slightly vindicated when she flinched. "Then why are you here at midnight?" he asked her in a confident whisper.

"You're the one who called me drunkenly crying about your bike," she said quietly, glaring at the wall with a bit of uneasiness. Her eyes turned a murky navy blue. "I knew I never should've came here. You just don't get it," she hissed. "You were a fuck buddy. Nothing more. It's not my fault you caught feelings for me."

Her outburst almost made him laugh. She said her piece as if falling in love was like catching a cold or a virus. "Goddamnit you're so damn stubborn," he couldn't help but sneer as he grabbed her chin and forced her eyes to his. "Now why don't you try looking at me when you say all of that bullshit."

"I don't owe you shit. Not an apology. Not anything."

At this moment, he knew her game. She was saying all of the right things to try to push his buttons, to push him away. It was her defense mechanism at work. Classic Uo. She probably figured the more callous she acted, the more she could alienate him.

But it wasn't working. It was doing the opposite. She was trying so hard to shove him away, but he couldn't help but want more.

"You're trying way too hard to make me hate you."

The last of her fight was gone. It fizzled out when her eyes filled with tears. Uo looked pissed at herself for showing him this side of her. He was sure her plan was failing before her eyes and she couldn't stand it.

"Fuck off," she countered. She tried rubbing her eyes casually with the sleeve of her sweater so that it wouldn't seem like she was brushing away tears. But the tears still flowed.

"I'll ask you again. Are you in love with Kureno-kun?"

"I said fuck off!"

"You never answered my question."

"I don't owe you shit."

"Quit repeating yourself. You're shitty at stalling, you know that?"

Uo was in tears at this point. "I really fucking hate you," she sobbed.

"And I really fucking love you, so I guess we're both screwed."

"I gave you back your bike. That was what you wanted. What more do you want?"

He leaned in again. His lips barely brushed against her tear-stained ones as he said, "I really didn't care about the bike. Jesus. This isn't about a damn bike. You can see that, can't you?"

He wasn't sure who moved first. First he saw the tears dangling from her lashes close up. He saw her eyes, nose, and lips, all magnified.

But then that view was covered by his eyelids, and all he could see was black.

Without his sight, it was all sounds, touch, and taste.

He felt her lips on his, warm and wet with tears.

He heard her heartbeat in the quiet room. It was going faster, faster, faster.

He could taste the saline of her passionate tears, along with the flavor of her recently chewed gum. The taste of spearmint numbed his tongue as their mouths tangled together.

When they broke away for air, he blinked his eyes open. His sight restored, he stared at the love of his life.

"Dammit. I've got it bad. I just can't leave you alone, Uo—"

But the rest of his sentence was swallowed up by Uo's lips and tongue in another soul-snatching, heart-shuddering kiss. It was punctuated with so many mixed up emotions. He placed his hands over her, right above her head. He pressed her into the wall as he returned her kiss. Hatsuharu couldn't help but nip at her lower lip, which made her yelp in both pain and pleasure. He grinned against her lips.

"I missed you," she slurred.

"Oh, I missed you too," he admitted in a hoarse whisper. He searched her face for clues to how she was really feeling. Her face was so relaxed, awash in a passionate glow. Her cheeks were a healthy pink and her eyes were heavily lidded. She was perfect.

He wanted to ask her what this all meant, but he found himself snacking on her lips again. He could almost taste blood. It drove him crazy. With a grunt, he swooped her up in his arms as her legs coiled around his waist.

He had to rely on his other senses to walk backwards with her attached to him. He tried to gauge the layout of the room, feeling around with one arm behind him to make sure they didn't fall into any dangerous situations.

Luckily, when they did fall back, it was against the familiar cushion of the futon.

But he still felt like he was in danger because he was falling faster and faster into Uo.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

Hatsuharu sat up with a groan. He let his head fall back before swinging it over his left shoulder. The satisfying crack his neck made was the only sound in the room. He rubbed the nape of his neck as he heaved a big sigh of relief.

He looked over at Uo. She was busy lighting a cigarette with a simple snap of his silver lighter. She took a deep breath before exhaling plumes of heather gray smoke. Her gaze was soft and distant as she leaned over to tap the excess char from her cigarette into the ashtray on the ground beside her.

The silence that covered them much like the white sheet on the futon was easy and simple. There was no expectation of conversation. There was no need to fill that space with meaningless words.

He had a huge distaste for small talk. It just was empty pleasantries and a desperate attempt to fill the void in his opinion. One of the reasons he had trouble making new friends, besides his stoic demeanor, was the fact that he simply wouldn't engage in the societal expectation of exchanging empty pleasantries.

When he was with her, it was different. Even when they first met. Even when they had that first unexpected run-in at the nightclub. Their meetings were always effortless. It was amazing how at ease and comfortable he felt with her.

It was scary.

Even now, in this room beside her, he was waiting for the fall. Yes, they were comfortable together now, but that didn't mean that it would translate into his biggest wish right now.

He tried opening his mouth to speak, but found that he wanted to be gentle with this fragile silence. There was a soft acceptance sitting beside them at the moment, and he didn't want to chase that feeling away. He couldn't risk her walking out on him again.

He had so many questions for her. Dangerous questions, like "What are we now?" and "What's going on between us?" But he sensed that she would just put up her towering defenses again, and he would be locked out again.

This was a start. This was good. He smiled softly as he reached a tentative hand over to hers. Her fingers laced with his, palms squeezed together. Her acceptance of his touch made his grin spread larger over his face.

She finally looked over at him after taking another drag. The sunrise turned her skin into milk and honey.

"Haru-kun…"

Her voice was a rough raspy whisper that made goosebumps squeeze his skin. Just the touch of her voice was enough to draw a response. Everything about her drove him insane.

"Yes, Arisa-kun?" he asked, pausing to wait how she would react to the way his voice projected her name so boldly. He missed calling her name. She had so many names, and relationships to go with those names. When he barely knew her, she was Uotani-san. She was just an abstract idea. Just a shadowy acquaintance. Someone not really worth getting to know, although he was always fairly polite with her.

She transformed from a stranger, an Uotani-san, to a more comfortable (but still courteous) Uo-san. And she remained Uo-san, even as their relationship traveled deeper.

But then she became Uo-kun, or just Uo, and now Arisa-kun. It didn't matter which name he called her. She became someone soft and familiar. A lover. A friend. A confidant. Someone he could rely on.

He wasn't sure when it changed. When his feelings turned from distant association, to acquaintances, to flirtation, to lust, and finally, love.

Her hair fell in a goldenrod sweep. She brushed it back casually, taking some of the rising sun's rays with it. The strands glistened like the champagne he drunk that night when they crossed the line.

"I was wondering... when did you know?"

"When did I know?"

"When did you know that you were in love with me?"

There was a bit of a rasp in her intonation. He joked with her often that her smoking habit was going to give her a hoarse old lady chainsmoker's voice, but that didn't seem to be the case just yet. The rough tone had more to do with the fact that it was early morning and these were the first words she uttered for the day.

She still wasn't looking at him. He wondered what view was passing before her eyes. She just looked so deep in thought. She was a mystery to him, even now.

The covers turned into whirlpools with his movements. He brought his knees up as he leaned forward. Now it was his turn to look into nothing. He paused, really thinking about her words and weighing them carefully. He wasn't sure if he was being tested, but he had a feeling that his answer meant everything in this moment.

Hatsuharu balled his hands into fists and perched his chin atop them. "You told me that you would go crazy with me," he started, folding his eyes shut. The scene around him seemed to morph into that day as he reminisced about when he first fell in love with Uo.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

The crash bit the air with such an intensity, it shook his entire being.

He heard noises. Voices. He couldn't identify what they belonged to, if they were female or male voices, if they were the voices of foes or friends.

His vision was swimming in a pool of trembling blood and shattered glass.

It was too loud. He couldn't take it. He screamed.

"Haru-kun? Haru-kun!"

The other voices fell away as he concentrated on that one purifying sound. It was Uo.

Footsteps clambered into the adjourning bathroom. She appeared by his side.

He turned around.

Her face...

It was a haunted face. She was so alarmed, so frightened. She was completely pale, eyes wide, mouth agape.

His vision tilted from side to side as if he were on a sinking ship in the middle of the blackest ocean.

He didn't even realize he was screaming until Uo finally rushed forward and shook him.

"Haru-kun? Haru-kun! Oh, God, what's happening?"

He watched her self-control collapse right in front of him. First her shoulders shook. Then her head. Then she started sobbing as if someone were dying.

In a way, he was.

"I gotta get bandages. Bandages, bandages," she muttered in a voice that swayed uncontrollably. She broke away from him to grab a wad of toilet paper. Springing forward, she smashed the soft crumple into his fist and instructed him to hold it to his wounds to stop the bleeding. Uo then managed to stumble to the cabinet.

He felt tears fill his eyes but they didn't dare fall down his cheeks. He looked down at the cesspool of blood, sticky and crimson, on the linoleum floor. He then took his gaze over to the shattered mirror. A thousand Hatsuharus looked back at him in confusion. The spider web of cracks was so jagged and piercing. Some pieces of mirror were crumbled over the white basin. Smaller shards glimmered in the sunlight on the floor.

He didn't even know how he got into the bathroom in the first place. He only remembered falling asleep, holding Uo close to him.

Next thing he knew, he had punched a hole in the mirror and was screaming uncontrollably.

Uo's touch came next. She held his hands softly. He noticed a tremble in them.

Peroxide poured onto his hands when she guided him to the sink. He growled and cursed. The slap of the abrasive liquid to his gashes was brutal.

"Hush," she chided as she blotted the wounds on his knuckles with more tissue. With an agility and speed that made his head spin, she wrapped up his knuckles in the white bandages.

She paused to hold both of his hands in hers. The view would have been charming if not for the bloody rosebuds spreading over the thin bandages. She wouldn't show him her face, but he knew from her sniffling that she was crying.

"W-W-What happened just now?" she questioned warily. She still looked so shocked. It was a shock to him too, but he was in such a state of disbelief that he could hardly believe that this was real. If his fist didn't hurt so much, he might've thought this was all just a dream.

Hatsuharu grabbed his skull as he looked up into the spiderweb again. That view of them was now just broken pieces. His face, his handsome face, was now sliced up in that mirror view. He looked like a ghastly abstract piece, all cut up with no hope of repair.

"Uo-san...," he started brokenly. His eyes were rounded with fear and shock. The tears were starting to fall. He saw a few specks of blood on the mirror now that he was up close to his reflection.

He took a deep breath before saying his next words.

"When I was younger, I used to have... night terrors. Really bad ones. Ones that made me scream uncontrollably in the middle of the night. My mother took me to therapy. It was really a problem. I was sleepwalking into dangerous situations, not knowing where I was or why I was there. I could barely sleep." It was like word vomit. Everything was just coming up. But she nodded slightly, despite the fear in her eyes, urging him to continue. "I've been through a lot," he pressed on. "Just... horrible, horrible things that no one should ever have to live through. And I think a lot of those vivid nightmares are caused by my past. It was... awful."

"Hatsuharu-kun..."

"I wish I could tell you about all of it. I just... can't. It really hurts so much, Uo-san."

"I know," she murmured, barely loud enough for him to hear.

He took another deep breath before continuing. "On top of that, there's... another me."

"Another you? What do you mean, another you? There's just... you... Right?"

He gripped the slick surface of the porcelain sink as he leaned forward. He couldn't look at himself anymore. How could he explain White Haru and Black Haru without sounding totally insane? He was surprised she hadn't bolted yet. One minute, they were nestled together in bed. The next, he was screaming in the bathroom and punching the mirror. It was night and day, just like his Black and White selves.

He fought with himself to find the right words. It was a crazy thing to say aloud, but he felt like he could trust her with this vulnerability.

"I don't know if you've noticed, but... it's like I have two faces. The first face is what I call my 'normal' side. I'm pretty evened out. Not very happy. Not very sad. Just... okay. But the other me is just violent, reckless, angry, and emotional as hell. It's seriously like living with another me in this body. And when I turn into... this other person... I don't usually remember what happens. I have no recollection of what my other self has said or done. I just snap back into focus and the damage is done already.

"It has gotten better. It's strange. I feel like me and this other person communicate now, and I can feel my normal self in the background when he's around. But sometimes, I really just black out and I can't tell you for the life of me what happened or what I said or did. Because the normal me just falls asleep when this other me takes over." He shuddered. "And I think that's what happened just now."

Now that he was talking to Uo about this split personalities, he could piece everything together. He couldn't remember exactly, but he guessed that he had another bad night terror. But when he woke up, he was Black Haru instead of his usual White. His night terrors caused him to change overnight a lot of the time when he was younger. But this was the first time he woke up into his White self so abruptly after a night terror. Pairing this with the fact that his hand was covered in blood and the mirror was shattered when he turned White again added on to his fear.

 _But what if instead of punching that mirror, I punched her instead?_ he asked himself in horror.

A dark feeling eternally teethed on the edge of his consciousness. There was always that underlying gnawing feeling that he might seriously harm someone he loved as a result of turning into Black Haru.

Beating up Kyo and getting into scuffles with him certainly didn't count. The two of them were fairly evenly matched in terms of martial arts ability. Plus, Kyo could take it. They'd sparred together so many times when they were kids.

It was one thing to destroy property. But if he ever put his hands on someone to cause them real, physical harm...

The kind that couldn't be fixed with bandages and peroxide...

He felt himself dry heaving with his thoughts. His vision blotted around him. Specks of black dotted his vision. He gripped the sink as if it was the only solid thing he could depend on to keep him from losing it. He could feel himself slipping away into dark memories that he never wanted to revisit. Visions of dungeons, cages, a torture chamber, and their God's howling laugh...

But her cool fingertips sinking into his biceps brought him back. He used her touch to help him snap back into focus. He concentrated on the feel of her touch until it filled in the darkness with light and warmth.

"What if I'm going crazy?" he wondered aloud.

She wrapped her arms around his torso. His bare skin tingled with the feel of her body pressed up against his back. He could feel his heart fluttering for the first time in a long time. A rush of warmth flooded his body.

"Listen to me, Hatsuharu-kun. Focus on my voice, and really hear me when I say that you're not going crazy."

"Uo-san... this just isn't normal." He paused to laugh, half in delirium, half because he didn't know what else to do.

"Just what is normal anyway?" She snuggled up closer to him. "I'll always be here to hold you. Whenever you feel like the world is falling apart, just know that I'm here, and I understand exactly what you're going through, because I feel like I could go crazy too."

Even though it was quiet, the air buzzed with electric sparks. He felt like he was crackling all over. It was enough to make his head spin, but he didn't feel sick or frightened. Rather, he felt grounded and safe in her embrace.

Without her saying anything more, he understood. He had a hard life that made him tough all over. It was as if he tied barbed wire around his whole aura, making sure no one got too close. If he showed too much emotion, he would let people get too close, and if they got too close, then they would find out how dark and twisted his life really was.

How dark and twisted he really was.

But Uo knew, even without the specifics, that he had a difficult past that he was still working through.

Just like her.

Uo was much more open about her violent past, but he always sensed there was something else she wasn't telling him.

Something that hurt too much to say...

He looked up into the broken mirror once again.

Now he was looking at her, magnified a million times, holding him.

Holding him.

Holding him like she would never let go.

"But will you tell me if you do go crazy?" she murmured against his skin. He could feel droplets of her tears slide down his arm.

"Why would you want me to do that? So you know when to get the hell away from me?" he asked with a crack of humorless laughter.

In response, she squeezed him tighter.

"So I know when to go crazy with you."

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

"Haru-kun?"

Hatsuharu snapped back into reality. He hadn't realized that he'd retreated into thoughtful silence until she spoke. When he looked over at her, he felt himself drowning in eyes that were the color of a rough and choppy sea. He couldn't help but bring a hand to her cheek. She was so important to him. How could he begin to tell her how much he loved her?

Before, he thought they were simply having fun. It was no strings attached, they were free and single, but chose each other for fulfillment. But that fulfillment was nothing more than physical. Uo and Hatsuharu had a spoken and unspoken agreement. They would hang out, and talk, and share certain parts of their lives to each other. But nothing deep, or serious, or sorrowful. They decided to show only the fun, shining parts of themselves.

Neither Hatsuharu nor Uo wanted to admit it openly, but they were completely self-destructive in this arrangement. They were dancing around the real issues, which was their utter loneliness and despair that the people they loved so desperately didn't choose them. At least on Uo's end, Kureno loved her but certain circumstances prevented them from being together. Hatsuharu sometimes wondered if Rin truly loved him. She loved him once, he was sure of that. But when she left him, was it to protect him, or to protect herself? He wasn't sure. But he'd made his peace with Rin, and they were at least civil to each other now. They were both adults after all.

"I'm sorry."

She gaped at him. "What?"

Hatsuharu expelled all the air from his lungs in one huge, cleansing sigh. He stroked her cheek tenderly. "I wasn't being very fair to you, was I. Yelling at you, blaming you... For this, all of this. I was a shitty friend. I have to apologize for using you too." His gaze burned intensely. "I can understand why you were so angry with me. Why you wanted to end this... whatever this is. God. Honestly." He unleashed a bark of humorless laughter. "I was such a douche. I used you as a replacement for Rin. To try and escape my problems. I thought that if I got involved with you, I'd just... automatically heal. But that healing hasn't had a chance to fully develop. Because I was lying to myself. I'm so sorry, Uo-kun. I'm sorry I didn't give you or me a chance to truly heal."

His heart twinged with guilt and unrequited love. _God must be laughing at me right now,_ he mused as he closed his eyes. _First Rin, now Uo. I guess I'm not allowed to have anyone, am I. I just don't have the right to love anyone, and to have them love me in return. Maybe I was a jackass in a past life. God. This sucks._

She bowed her head in turn. Two champagne curtains fell by her face. "Don't take all of the credit," she mumbled. "I wasn't exactly the nicest person to you either. I'm aware that I can be a real bitch. I'm rough around the edges..."

"Rough around the edges? How about all over?"

She laughed. "Yes," she admitted sheepishly. "Even when we first met. It wasn't you. I just had a huge chip on my shoulder. I thought I was all big and bad and invincible. But truth is, when I lost Kureno-kun... I just felt so lost. He was my first love. I wanted to lash out at everyone. I just didn't even feel lovable. And that really hurt."

"I can relate," he agreed hoarsely. "It was so hard, letting her go. But I have to believe that it was for the best." The next part pained him to say, but he continued. "But it looks like you and Kureno-kun are on the mend now. That's..." His voice cracked. He grimaced. "Argh. I wish I could say, 'That's great' like a normal, sane friend would. I would congratulate you and wish the both of you the best. But I can't help it. I'm selfish, Uo-kun. I'm so in love with you. And I don't ever want to lie to you. So wishing the both of you the best would be the biggest lie I've ever told in my life."

He reached forward to place his hands over her bare shoulders. "I want you to myself," he confessed. "That's probably really childish and stupid, but I don't care. I don't care how childish and stupid I'm being right now. I tried to move on. But I'm so miserable without you, and that's the truth. But I guess there's nothing I can do about it, huh. You don't love me. You told me that yourself."

Uo paused. He couldn't bear to look at her. He would probably see something resembling pity in her expression, and he would just feel too pathetic.

"Listen, Haru-kun..."

"You don't have to say all of the clichés," he interrupted brokenly. "I don't want to hear, 'You're a great guy, but for someone else,' or, 'You'll find someone who deserves you,' or, 'I only like you as a friend, I'm sorry.' I wouldn't be able to handle it. I just wanted to tell you my feelings for once. I just had to be truthful for once in my life. When I met you, you were just 'Tohru's Yankee friend.' But you've really become someone important to me. So please, don't reject me. Not formally. It'll only make me feel worse."

"While we're talking about being honest... I have something to tell you. I might as well tell you now," she murmured.

That caught his attention. He straightened up. "What is it?" he asked almost nervously.

Uo picked up on the tense atmosphere, because she started showing signs of anxiety. She clasped her hands in her lap as she avoided eye contact.

"The truth is..."

* * *

Sorry. I know. I'm evil. Any guesses on what the truth is? Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing. ^^;;


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket. It belongs to the talented Natsuki Takaya.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

Hatsuharu sat there in frozen shock, trying to absorb what she'd just said.

But no matter how hard he tried to think, the words just slapped him cruelly.

He clutched his hands into fists. His fingernails bit viciously into the skin of his sweaty palms.

His heart palpitated as he broke out in a cold sweat.

"You're leaving?" he asked numbly.

Uo didn't have a reply for him. She just threw her hair over her face the way she usually did when she was hurting and she didn't want anyone to see such weakness.

"Why didn't you fucking tell me that earlier?" he barked in the face of her silence. His eyes knifed into her broken form. She was practically hunched over in either shame or remorse. He wasn't sure which, and he couldn't bother to speculate when his own emotions were a whirlwind.

"I just can't believe you right now," he continued. "Aren't you going to say anything right now?"

Her eyes trailed up to his face finally. "I'm sorry," she breathed.

"'Sorry'?" he echoed incredulously. "'Sor—'" He stopped himself by sinking his upper teeth into his full bottom lip. "Fuck," he finished sharply.

Hatsuharu was supposed to be happy for her. He was supposed to say, "Congratulations" and offer encouragement. But although it was an accomplishment, it still hurt him. He felt used. Betrayed. Especially since she'd came to his house to drop off his bike, only to end up in his bed again.

"When did you get the news?" he asked.

Uo twirled her fingers in her slightly tangled hair. "A month ago," she admitted guiltily.

He felt as if he had marbles in his mouth when he spoke. The shock was so apparent. "So you got the acceptance letter a month ago. And you didn't even think to share this with me."

She chose her next words carefully, but they still stung. "I just…. I have a full ride waiting for me. And I think I want to study law. I couldn't pass it up. Not when I'd have the chance to study in the States at such a prestigious university. What… What did you want me to do, Haru? Did you want me to decline so that I could continue… whatever this is?"

Hatsuharu laughed harshly in response. "I would never want that. I want you to pursue your dreams. I know that college was always something you were worried about. You were saving up so much money, working so hard… But it would've been nice if you'd included me in your life. But I guess I never meant much to you, huh."

She flinched angrily. "Stop making this about you," she hissed.

"Right," he shot back sarcastically. "Because it's never, ever about you. You're always right, and I'm wrong."

"I never said that. You're twisting my words around. Fuck!"

"Goddammit. Uotani Arisa. Am I just nothing to you? Do you get off on jerking me around like some idiot? You have me fighting battles for you and going out of my way just to be with you. Do you despise me that much?"

Her eyes sharpened into steel blue. "Don't give yourself so much credit. I could care less about making you hate me," she retorted.

"Get out."

She was clearly taken aback. The shock in her eyes spoke volumes. "What?"

"I said, get out! Get out of my damn house! I can't even stand to look at you. You were just playing with me this whole time. I'm tired of this damn game that you're playing. What was this even for?" he shrieked wildly as he gestured to the futon. "A goodbye fuck? A final game? Well played, Uotani. You really fooled me. You got your laughs in at my expense, I'm sure. Now you're running off to the States to go to university, and you'll forget me and my sorry existence, and you'll move on without me. I'm sure that stringing me along gave you a lot of entertainment, but it ends here. Have a nice life with Kureno-kun. I really mean that."

Uo shot up, clutching the white sheet over herself. "Fuck you," she seethed.

"Yeah, you took care of that, thanks," he spit bitterly.

"I thought you were my friend. Guess that was wrong."

"You know what, Uo, just shut it. You don't know what a real friend is. A real friend is someone who's honest and real. I thought you were authentic. Guess you were just fake."

He watched her stomp around angrily, locating her scattered articles of clothing. She yanked on her undergarments, then nearly shredded her sweater when she threw it over her head. Hatsuharu wordlessly handed Uo her pants, which she snatched from his loose grip.

She stood in front of the door, her back facing him. The atmosphere was completely heated and tense. None of their earlier gentleness remained. He started to feel a twinge of remorse, but he forced himself to harden his heart. She was the one walking out on him. It was finally over. _Good riddance,_ he tried to tell himself. But he couldn't help feeling betrayed and ultimately miserable because the one he loved was leaving for good.

She raised her hand to the doorknob and paused. Uo hesitated. He could feel the air buzz with her unspoken words. She wanted to say something to him. He sensed it. That was how well he knew her, inside and out. He could read her moods in a single stance, without her face to give him any indications of how she was feeling.

But he couldn't have predicted what she said next. It truly shocked him.

"…Be happy, Hatsuharu-kun," she finally responded wearily. "I'm sorry that it had to end like this."

He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

She flung open the door and left before he could get his thoughts together.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

"Hatsuharu-kun…"

He looked over at Uo expectantly. Her hair was spread out all over the pillow like a Christmas angel. The moonlight bleached her platinum blond hair a heavenly silver. He loved how it turned her eyes into blue crystal, and how the light bounced off of her luminescent skin. Hatsuharu turned on his side to face her.

It had only been two months since they started "seeing" each other. The term "seeing" was used in only the loosest, most literal sense. But he also thought it was a fitting term for their involvement. Everything was light and fun before, just no strings attached sex and late nights drinking. They didn't delve into their past heartbreaks, or their painful pasts. But lately, she was letting him in more. Her rough edges were starting to smooth over. Uo was finally starting to relax around him. The fact that they could just lie together, silent and still, proved it. There was no need to fill the silence. No expectation of chatter. No noise. Nothing extra. Just them together, in the same space, under the same sky.

He took the intimate moment between them to lace his fingers through hers. She squeezed his hand back. It made something warm bubble in his heart. Lately, he was seeing her less and less as a hookup, and more of a confidant. She was a precious friend, a lover, someone incredibly dear to him.

She turned her cheek to look at him. Blue and silver formed midnight crescents in those eyes. Those eyes that he adored so much…

To his surprise, Uo smiled at him so sadly, it nearly split his heart into two.

"Make me a promise," she asked in a silvery whisper.

"Promise?" he repeated gently.

"You have to keep it, no matter what. If you don't, I'll be so mad at you," she said sternly.

"Uh-oh." Hatsuharu propped himself up on his elbow to look down at her. "Sounds like you mean business. Can I ask what this promise is? Can't go promising without asking after all."

Uo's lips twisted into a shape that indicated that she wanted to smile but felt like she had to control herself. "I'm being serious, Haru. Dammit. Don't make me laugh."

"I'm being serious too."

Her harsh tone snapped him back into focus. "Haru."

"Okay, okay. What is it? At least tell me before you make me promise."

Uo sighed. She spoke so softly that he had to lean in even closer to hear. His face was mere centimeters from hers. He wanted desperately to kiss her lips so that he could swallow up her sorrowful proposition. Her tone didn't sound too optimistic. But he feared her retaliation if he really did kiss her, so he restrained himself.

"You have to promise that you won't fall in love with me."

His heart jumped in his rib cage when she spoke. _I think it's a little too late for that…,_ he thought to himself. Hatsuharu caught himself. Was that true? Was he in love with her?

"Me? Fall in love with you? Heh. Don't you think you sound a little too narcissistic when you say things like that?" he joked. Hatsuharu started to laugh, hoping that she would join in too. But the laughter died on his lips in the face of her stoic expression.

"I mean it. Don't."

"May I ask why?" he asked hesitantly. Absentmindedly, he brushed back some renegade strands that fell in front of her face.

He would never, ever forget how she pierced through his very soul with her stare. Nor would he forget her words when she spoke.

Time froze as she laid there, gazing at him. She was like a wise old sage imparting her wisdom. But he felt so lost, even when she told him her logic.

"Because I'll just make you cry."

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

' _Because I'll just make you cry.'_

Her words followed him like a hollow echo as he stood alone in his apartment.

Alone. Always alone. Always alone while she got to leave conveniently whenever she grew tired of arguing.

He had to live in this apartment, with traces of her everywhere.

Strands of golden hair in his shower drain.

The smell of her perfume on his pillow.

Her cartons of lipstick-smeared cigarettes.

She was gone, but bits of her soul remained. And Hatsuharu had to live with the evidence of her spirit everywhere.

"It must be great… getting to leave whenever you want, Uo…" His shoulders quaked with emotion as he crumpled his form close to the floor. He squeezed his eyes shut but her voice still rang through his ears.

 _She told me this whole time… How she felt about me…. Why didn't I listen? I'm so stupid. So stupid for falling for her. For believing that we could be anything more._

' _I'm going back to Kureno-kun. This was just all a huge mistake. A distraction from what was really important.'_

' _You should've just let me take care of it. I can handle my own shit.'_

' _You just don't get it. You were a fuck buddy. Nothing more. It's not my fault you caught feelings for me.'_

Her hesitation, her sad eyes, her tears… Were they fake? Or did he imagine that those sad glances and wistful sighs were for him somehow? That she was feeling insecure about their relationship, and that she was secretly in love with him too?

Maybe he projected his own feelings of unrequited love and insecurity onto her.

Maybe he would never know.

Still shaking, he stood slowly. His hands crumpled into fists. They were balled up so tightly that his fingers tingled from the pressure.

He willed himself to cry, just like she said he would. He was so angry and hurt, plus still so in love with Uo despite everything. But the tears wouldn't come. They were locked up far away in his heart. He could feel his emotions freezing over and reaching their boiling point at the same time.

The world grew very quiet, dark, and still. He could feel himself slipping away.

Black Haru took over in a fury of gunmetal silver eyes and crackling red rage. With a roaring growl, he launched his fists blindly into any and everything that was in his path.

Lamps fell over, coat racks, his stupid vases full of dead flowers. He heard glass shattering but his vision was a blur. He only saw rage.

He could feel his lips moving and his voice coming out, but he couldn't make out the words.

He just wanted to destroy everything. Anything. Anything to get his frustrations and anger out of his system.

Hatsuharu screamed as he tore the apartment apart. He ripped up the pillows until stuffing flowed from the gashes like foam. He flipped over his coffee table and tore at all of his notebooks. He kicked and cursed and hit until his lungs and limbs ached.

But as much as he beat everything in sight down to nothing, nothing could beat the loneliness out of him.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

Dark. Cold. Icy.

Hatsuharu shivered underneath his black faux leather jacket as he sucked on his cigarette and expelled the smoke smoothly into the winter air. His breath formed a cloud on the icy wind currents. He was a regular chain smoker now. A real pro. He wasn't the same stupid, naïve guy who couldn't handle the nicotine. But he knew this wasn't a real accomplishment. Smoking was a waste of time and life. He knew that, but he was always drawn in by the nicotine. He used to get by with an occasional social smoke. Now, he couldn't get through the day without it. He was completely hooked.

Hatsuharu plucked the still lit cigarette from between his lips and gave it an accusatory glare. He had many vices. Liquor was one of them. Not that he couldn't get by without it. But since he met Uo, he knew he drank more. He hadn't even entertained the idea of smoking until he spoke to Uo.

But his biggest vice of all was love.

This love wasn't healthy. He knew that. It was based on fantasy and lies. All this time, he built Uo up as this great, wonderful person. And she was. But he certainly augmented the things he liked about her, and downplayed or straight up ignored the not so pleasant traits.

Kicking a nasty habit was one thing. There were resources and all types of help in place for those struggling with addictions. Whether those addictions were to drugs, or alcohol, or cigarettes. But what about for addictions to love itself?

He looked over his shoulder at the lit house. Everyone inside of Shigure's home was lively and happy. He could hear joyful music playing, and everyone was chatting away. Kyo's rough speech flittered through his ears, followed by Tohru's maternal and soft tone. Shigure was busy making perverted jokes, as usual. To a casual observer, it would look like a cozy winter scene. The snow was starting to fall in soft feathery strokes over the dark property. The night glistened with shining stars in a satiny blue sky. But to Hatsuharu, his entire world was ending.

He flinched. He barely noticed that the cigarette was still burning away in his fingers until some ash fell onto his skin. He flicked the half cigarette to the snow-covered ground and dug his toe into it.

 _I'm going to quit,_ he decided firmly as the cigarette's orange tip soon sizzled away into black. _Going to quit everything. Cigarettes, champagne, and Uo. I'll never let those things touch my lips ever again._

"As long as I live," he told himself in a cracked voice, barely above a whisper.

He wasn't sure how long he stood in the dark, watching the snow fall. But in the silence, he felt himself grow stronger in his convictions. After all, addictions didn't have to last forever. With time and strength, he knew he could overcome it. He thought his life was over when Rin left him. But he was still standing, still alive in this world.

Hatsuharu's ears pricked up at the sound of soft footsteps coming towards him from behind. He turned around slowly, just at the footsteps stopped just a few meters from him.

Her hair blended into the late night sky, but some moonlight poured violet reflections on the strands. Beneath her cascading braid and long black bangs were dark shadowy orbs that stared blankly at him.

Hanajima.

They locked eyes in a seemingly never-ending stare down. He wanted to look away. Her piercing gaze was unnerving. He hated to admit it, as nice as she was, but Hana kind of gave him the creeps. She refused to back down, so he felt the need to play it cool. He never backed down from a staring contest.

Just as it was starting to get uncomfortable, Hana broke the silence.

"You're missing the party."

But she didn't say it with a falsely remorseful or coaxing inflection in her voice. She stated it matter-of-factly. That was the thing with Hanajima. He never quite knew what she was feeling. She was always so evened out. He was starting to yearn for his earlier days, when he was truly White Haru. He used to be so stoic and calm. But love turned him into a puddle of emotions.

Hatsuharu tried smiling but it felt phony, so he dropped it. He didn't feel like acting complacent today. There was nothing to smile about in this situation. In fact, she was intruding on a private and personal moment. He wished he could tell her politely to go away and let him sulk, but he didn't want to be rude. He couldn't have Hanajima using her creepy powers on him after all.

"I can't go in there. Not yet. I mean, Tohru-kun and Kyo-kun…. They're all in there, talking about wedding plans and all. Can't dampen the mood." This time, he allowed himself a rueful smile.

Hana quirked one perfectly arched brow in his direction. Besides the occasional cryptic smile, this was the most emotion he'd seen from her in a while. It took him aback but he pulled his composure together quickly.

"That's not the reason. Not the full reason anyways."

He couldn't help but laugh bitterly as he turned away from her. He was already shutting down. He felt so exhausted from today's events. He shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched underneath his jacket. Now that he was out here, having a conversation, he didn't feel the cold as strongly. But he felt an iciness in his heart that wasn't attributed to the weather.

"You should go inside. It's cold. I'll be in soon," he said sharply. He suppressed the shiver that threated to roll through his body. The last thing he needed was to show more weakness than he already had.

Moments of silence rolled by. He counted backwards from one-hundred in his head slowly. Minutes passed. His countdown was starting to wind down.

 _5…4…3…2…1._ His apprehensive heartbeat slowed. He took a deep breath and let it go. Finally, he could grieve alone. Hatsuharu turned back around.

Hana was still there.

 _Dammit,_ he cursed to himself as a scowl slashed through his face. _What's her problem?_

"I said, I'll be inside soon," he said, unable to keep the sharp inflection from his voice. Annoyance made his nostrils flare slightly. Hatsuharu narrowed his eyes into irritated slits. He let his eyes flicker briefly over her. Hana was dressed in a flowing amethyst-hued cape that draped over the snowy ground, but he doubted she was warm. The wind rippled through the landscape, sending her cape whipping through the air.

Now it was Hana's turn to narrow her eyes, unfeeling as they were.

"You're a terrible liar, Hatsuharu-kun."

"What?" he snapped. Hana was a strange girl. She took the time to seek him out, only to stare him down and speak bluntly to him.

"What's your freakin' deal?" he continued heatedly. Hatsuharu couldn't help but feel attacked, especially in this vulnerable state.

"You're not going inside because you don't want to run into Arisa, am I correct?"

Silence.

"H-How do you know that?" he asked warily as he spun around slowly to face her. Hatsuharu's mouth was agape, completely in shock. He could've sworn that he and Uo had an unspoken pact never to speak of their involvement. Had she confided in Hana, and perhaps even Tohru too? They were her best friends after all. "Did she say—?"

Hana slowly shook her head no. "She didn't have to."

"W-What?" he stuttered. He couldn't believe this. But he didn't get the impression that she was lying to him. Her confidence said it all. But it was a mystery as to how she knew. They were so sure that they were undercover. They had two faces they showed to the world. In real life, the life their friends knew, Uo and Hatsuharu were two people who were distant acquaintances at best, and complete strangers at worse. He racked his brain, trying to think of a slip up that one of them let loose, but he couldn't think of anything. Not even Shigure knew, and he was just as underhanded and nosy as ever.

Hana took one step forward. Her eyes were unblinking and blank.

"She said something to you, didn't she," he said uneasily. "Unless… you… you…."

Hana sighed slowly but calmly. The sound made him flinch. He could barely take her blank onyx eyes on him.

She folded her arms tight to her frame, hands dripping over opposite sides of her tiny frame. Her bony fingers were tipped with midnight nail polish. Those hands looked so skeletal. With her cape, she reminded him of a shinigami. Hatsuharu shoved his hands in his pockets quickly to hide the slight tremor in them. His fingertips were starting to turn blue from the cold.

"What, did you read her mind or something?" he sputtered desperately in the face of her stoic silence. Hana didn't let a drop of emotion slip from her demeanor. It was completely creepy but he seriously envied Hana in this moment. He used to be like her, with an eternal poker face. She was always so calm. He could never drag any strong feelings from her, even if he tried. She was a black mirror.

For some reason, it really unnerved him.

Hana took one soft snow-covered footstep towards him. Her black combat boots from where she once stood made perfect icy footprints in the crystal snow.

"Please don't misunderstand," she said evenly. "I possess many abilities, but mind reading is not one of them."

"Then how?" he asked in a cracked, dry whisper. Tears were threatening to escape the corners of his eyes. But he forced them to stay still.

She let a sliver of a smile touch her lips. Her thick, dark lashes fluttered shut over her eyes. "The red string of fate…," she murmured.

"Huh?" he asked incredulously. Hana wasn't making any sense.

Hana shook her head slightly. "Nevermind. You wouldn't understand. You're not ready."

"Not ready for what? God. You're so…"

In response, her smile deepened. It irked him so much. He found his hands reaching for his crushed carton of cigarettes. Before he could process it, he felt the cigarette between his lips, and he was lighting the tip.

Hatsuharu took a hard drag and blew it away. He could feel his tension loosening, but he was still on edge. Through smoky tendrils, Hana was still standing there, a confrontational shadow.

"Arisa is a great liar. So are you. To everyone, you both have no connections to each other. Your only link is your friendship with Tohru. Your love for her. You and Arisa have nothing in common to the casual observer. So how could I possibly guess that you two have feelings for each other." Hana blinked her eyes open.

"The eyes reveal so much. You can say as many lies as you want. You can put up false pretenses, all for show. But visceral reactions. A flash of hurt, a wounded glance, even looking away… All of those emotions, just in the eyes. Our minds and words can cast a sort of spell, and keep the truth hidden. But our bodies will always betray our true feelings." Her eyes shot straight through him. "Always."

There were angry protests that were building on his tongue, but he couldn't voice them. She would see right through them anyway. There was no use. Hatsuharu's shoulders slumped low in defeat.

"But how could you…?"

"Hatsuharu-kun."

"Well, you're wrong," he said in a steely voice, gaining some confidence back when he replayed a bit of their conversation in his mind. "I may have feelings for her, but she certainly feels nothing for me. She told me herself."

Silence.

"What do you say to that, Miss. Psychic? I don't buy your bull about not being able to read minds, by the way," he added in a smoky cough. He sucked hard on his cigarette again. The oral fixation was helping to distract him from the unpleasant conversation. "Not that it's any of your business, but she has told me many, many times that she wants nothing to do with me anymore. She's even showed me. I was just too blind to see it."

Hana said nothing in response. The radio silence made his stomach churn.

"And now she's leaving." It was all word vomit. Without warning, it was shooting straight out of him. He couldn't help it. He felt his cheeks warm with embarrassment. "She's going to college. I'm happy for her. Really. I was pissed that she didn't tell me at first. But she needs to… get away… from all this. Her crappy dad, and her crappy neighborhood, and… those terrible part-time jobs." His gaze fell to the glistening snow below. "She deserves to be happy. She does. I just wish… she cared enough about me, as a friend, to tell me. She kept it from me… Shit, what am I saying? She didn't owe me anything."

"Haru-kun."

The use of his nickname, said so boldly, killed all of the chatter on his lips. He forced his eyes to hers again. Any emotion? Nope. Same stoic Hana.

"What?" he asked feebly as he hastily finished his cigarette.

"You're babbling. You're not listening to me. You're only hearing what you want to hear."

"How do you figure? This is all fact."

"Then why did she look so miserable all night? And why could she barely look at you? And when she did… When she looked at you when you weren't looking, when she thought no one was looking… She looked so…"

"Oh, God. Cut it out with the dramatics. She looked so what?"

"Lost."

 _Lost_. The word reverberated through his body. He let the word touch his tongue. "Lost." He repeated it to himself. "Lost. Lost."

They stayed quiet together, watching the snow fall. It was starting to pick up. They should've gone inside a long time ago. Hana's amethyst cape was speckled with white snowflakes, and Hatsuharu was practically becoming a snowman with all of the snow on his body.

"I doubt that's possible, Hanajima," he said softly. Hatsuharu dropped the dead cigarette in his hand and stomped on it. He felt like he was in some torturous time loop. Would this night ever end? From the sounds of the drunken laughter coming from the Sohma estate, it sounded like the party would never end.

Another peal of wavy laughter floated onto the winter frost. Most of the laughter was Shigure's, to be honest. He was most likely laughing at another lame dad joke he'd made.

"God. Forget it. You wouldn't understand," he murmured under his breath. It was more to himself than to her. Sometimes he wondered if he was going crazy. He didn't understand anything anymore.

"You're not ready to hear this yet. You're still too hurt." Hana turned her body away from him. But she maintained eye contact with him over her shoulder.

He wanted to snap back at her. She was practically insulting him, but the fight was draining fast from his body. His whole soul felt too weary. He desperately craved solitude, but wanted to have company at the same time. It was an irritating paradox.

He started to speak, but she cut him off as he breathed his first syllable.

"Please… don't be too hard on her. She did what she thought was right. She didn't want to hurt you. I know it doesn't seem like it now. But she had her reasons. She wasn't ready too. Just like you. She needs to see things on her own." She smiled, but it was different. Less cryptic and cold, and a little more sad. "Just like you."

Before he could reply, she spun on her heel and left him alone to past memories.


	10. Chapter 10

This is the last chapter. Yay!! This is for Killer Disco Queen, for whom this story wouldn't have been possible. Thank you, thank you, thank you for sticking with me until the end.

Disclaimer: Fruits Basket is property of Natsuki Takaya. Curses! It's not mine.

O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.

"Yo, Haru-kun! Catch!"

The water bottle made an almost whistling sound as it cut through still air. He reached his hand up and effortlessly caught it even though his back was facing the thrower. He brought it to eye level and unscrewed the cap with a smirk.

The source of the water bottle laughed. "I never get tired of seeing you do that. Think you can teach me that karate shit sometime?"

"It's not really karate so much as being in tune with my environment."

"Yeah. Karate," he insisted. Hatsuharu sighed, but a smile tugged at one corner of his lips.

He turned around and looked at his friend. Yoshi was about his age, with shaggy blond hair and more piercings than he could count. He also had more than a few intricate tattoos running up and down his arms.

They only started working together last year, and it had been a wild ride. Working in this modest but thriving tattoo and piercing parlor was chaotic and crazy, but most of all fun. Hatsuharu felt like he finally found his niche among these colorful characters he called his coworkers at Vivid Tattoo Parlor.

Hatsuharu dimmed the lights. It was time to close shop. It was only a Monday after all. They saw most of their clientele on drunken Friday nights and smoky weekends. No one was going to come in for a tattoo or piercing anytime soon. Weekdays, particularly in the beginning of the week, were always dead.

But Hatsuharu didn't mind. He really liked working here as a piercer and tattoo apprentice. It was fun and exciting, and he got to meet so many different people from all parts of Japan as well as the world. He once despised meaningless small talk, but it was a part of his routine every day. He had to exchange pleasantries to keep things light for the clients. Whether it was to soothe tears, or calm nerves, he had to play the part as the cool and collected big brother figure.

They had a lot of young teens that came in, wannabe gangsters and thugs. They had good hearts, but fucked up lives. Their damage reminded him so much of his own darkness. He made those misfits feel at ease when they came in. They just wanted to feel understood. He could relate far more than they would ever know.

Yoshi crossed his arms. The crucifix on his left bicep flexed. "Hey, I can trust you to close up shop, right? I gotta get outta here."

"Let me guess. Hot date?"

A smug smile. "With twins."

"Highly unlikely. You have zero game, my friend." He took a sip of the cold water before waving a dismissive hand. "Go. Don't stay on my account. It's not like I'm gonna snitch on you for leaving twenty minutes early."

"Cool." His friend gathered up his cross-body tote and swung the shop keys in his direction. He caught them again on the first try, much to Yoshi's exaggerated amazement. Hatsuharu's laugh echoed off of the walls as the door banged shut behind his wannabe Casanova buddy.

He was finally alone. He looked around once more. Portraits of intricate tattoo designs decorated the walls. The neon sign hanging outside gave the lavender walls a soft blue glow.

Hatsuharu stood up and walked over to the full length mirror on the opposite end of the room. He didn't look half bad. He was a little paler than usual because he'd just recovered from a nasty cold. He was almost as pale as his shaggy white hair. He touched above the piercing over his left brow. It was almost done healing. So was the one on his bottom lip. He liked how the silver ring glinted in the low lighting.

His body was bare of any sort of tattoo, which was a running gag among his coworkers. "How can you claim to be an aspiring tattoo artist if you don't have any ink, bro?" they'd joke good-naturedly. Hatsuharu always just laughed it off. He'd always considered it, but he couldn't think of anything he loved enough to get inked on his skin permanently.

But he was one hell of a piercer. They gave him that. And Hatsuharu really enjoyed it. It was fun to transform someone completely through self-expression. Tattooing would just be the next step to that.

He turned away from his reflection and pulled at his studded black collar. The time was ticking away so slowly without anyone to capture his attention.

The thought made him recall something bittersweet from his past.

 _"Well? Did I capture your interest?"_

The memory made him smile but it wasn't without a bit of sadness. He could remember everything about her as if she were right in front of him. That night was still so sacred to him. It was the night their relationship changed. He sometimes wondered if it was for the better, or for the worse. Was it really better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all? Having survived two major heartbreaks, he would have to call bullshit on that particular statement.

He thought back on his relationship history after Uo. There were only a few women who'd come close to making him feel like Uo had made him feel. But it never compared. She changed him.

But Hatsuharu still believed in love, and miracles, and cute puppies with bows tied around their collars for Christmas. His heart was forever young and naïve. But he liked to think that he was touched with some realism now. He knew that not everyone got their happy ending.

But he was okay now. He was convinced he had to learn his lesson the hard way. He couldn't force someone to love him back. He learned this with Rin, and Uo was heartbreaker number two who repeated the lesson. He was always thick-skulled. The thought made him smile darkly.

 _I should probably close up now,_ he decided. Usually, if a client walked in at the last possible moment, he'd welcome them in with a smile and the same care he'd offer someone who approached him during business hours. But it was clear that no one needed his services on a cold, gray Monday. He sighed in relief that he would be leaving soon.

But he saw a quick movement when he turned his head towards the glass door.

It was brightly lit outside, so the flash of color looked almost platinum. Against his better judgement, he walked over to the entrance to investigate.

He opened the door and inhaled deeply. It was so cold, but the change in temperature was soothing on his flushed face. He hadn't realized it was so stuffy inside the tattoo parlor until now.

He closed his eyes and sighed with a smile. All things considered, he had a good life. He didn't have love, but he was happy.

Even so, he stood in the doorway and waited. He wasn't quite sure what he wanted, or what he expected. But it didn't come, and it made him feel a bit deflated.

 _Stop hoping for a dream,_ he scolded himself. With a shake of his head, he stepped back inside. It was time to go.

He turned his back and set about cleaning up a bit before leaving for good. But the bell on the door rang, signaling the entrance of a potential customer.

"Um… Sorry, we're closed," he grumbled. He normally wouldn't be so rude, but he wasn't in the mood to entertain customers today. He just wanted to go home and sleep.

"…It's really you. Haru-kun."

That voice…

He slowly turned to face her.

Three years hadn't changed how he reacted so strongly to her presence. The time, distance, heartbreak… All of it fell away. He was just a young college kid in the throes of puppy love.

He couldn't believe it. Was Uo really standing in front of him? She was panting slightly from between rosy lips, and her eyes were all lit up as if he were a beloved Christmas present. Same blonde hair, long and silky. Her eyes were clear and bright, but changed somehow. Law school made her harder in some of the planes of her face. But she still had some softness, some hope of saving the world and believing in miracles.

Uo.

He wasn't confident in how to act around her. They hadn't spoken to each other in so long. Should he close off his emotions and brush her off like she'd done to him so many times? Or would acting as if everything was perfectly fine be too much of a pretense? He didn't know which approach to use with her yet. He studied her expression. Uo was an open book. She looked genuinely happy to see him. Almost as though she'd been looking for him.

Uo must've been having similar thoughts, because a storm cloud passed over her once sunny and open expression. She pulled her long arms closer to herself as if forming a barrier. She looked down at her shoes. There was hesitation in her body language. It spoke wordlessly with his stunned silence.

"I…," she began, faltering. A lock of blonde hair fell in front of her eyes. She tucked it back neatly behind her ear, but some strands escaped.

He managed to muster up a welcoming smile. "Uotani-san. It's been a while." He hated how his voice cracked with emotion, but he couldn't summon his former stoic self. Memories and feelings came rushing at him in waves. He wondered if she was feeling the same way.

 _Stop it,_ he chided himself. _That's in the past. It's over._

She brought her face back to his line of sight. Uneasiness passed over her eyes for a split second before she locked that small burst of emotion away. But was the uneasiness from their agonizing and bitter goodbye? He wasn't sure.

But she wasn't deterred. She took a step towards him. "'Uotani-san'? Are we strangers, Haru-kun?" She'd tried to take on a nonchalant tone but there was a crack in the façade. She rushed to cover her fatal flaw. "Loosen up, will ya?" she laughed. "I thought it was you. Your hair is unmistakable. How are you? It's been…"

He waited for her to continue, but he knew the sentence would be left unfinished like a road block out of nowhere. She'd wanted to say, "It's been a while. How've you been?" like a normal set of friends catching up. But they weren't typical. Nothing about their relationship had been.

Uo caught her bottom lip between her front teeth. It was a gesture she'd do sometimes when she felt cornered. He used to think it was beyond cute.

Unfortunately, that hadn't changed.

"I'm sorry. I'm a terrible host. Um…" He paused to scratch the back of his neck. "Why don't I take your coat? You can sit down and we can catch up."

It was the right thing to say. To his relief, the awkwardness washed from her face and she smiled happily again. "You got any coffee by any chance?"

"Why don't I summon my butler to make you a fine Italian cappuccino, Your Highness?" he half-joked. It wasn't very funny, but she gave him a peal of laughter. It helped to soften the tense air around them. She wordlessly opened her arms up again. He came behind her and slowly slipped the gray trench coat from her shoulders. Underneath, she wore a flimsy white blouse with a loose bow at the neckline.

It was only a coat. Just a coat coming off of her shoulders. He was being a gentleman by taking it off for her. He tried to tell himself this. _This isn't the most intimate thing we've done. And I'm getting all flustered over a damn coat?_ he scolded himself. But in this dimly lit, lonely tattoo parlor, the simple act of taking off this coat felt even more intimate. It was the outermost layer, the most protective barrier from the winter cold. And he was revealing her soft insides. He couldn't help but blush.

His fingers accidentally fanned over her bare shoulders. He pulled them away with a way too noticeable jerk. She'd noticed his tension. She reflected his feelings in the way her face flushed.

"Th—Thank you."

He was glad he wasn't the only one shaken up by her presence. He turned away to hang her coat neatly on the coat rack by the door. He handled the heavy garment with the utmost care, almost as if it were a precious prayer cloth. He paused a little too long at the doorway.

"Coffee. Right. I'll make you some. How do you take it?" he mumbled.

He could practically feel the question she wanted to ask foaming at her lips. But she didn't ask it. Instead, she replied, "Two sugars and a little cream. If it's not too much trouble."

"Not at all." This time, he confronted the danger of her gaze. He smiled. This time it wasn't forced. "Coming right up."

Moments later, he came back with a hot cup of coffee for them both. If an awkward silence sprouted up (and he had a feeling it undoubtedly would), he could consult the coffee cup for refuge.

She was perched on the purple velvet cushioned armchair. It was the tattoo parlor owner's special seat. But he wasn't going to usher her out. She wasn't a part of this history. She didn't know anything about this part of his life. In fact, she was a perfect stranger again. She knew his past, but not his present, and perhaps not even his future. The thought gave him an unexpected pang.

"One coffee. Extra hot. Just how you like it."

She accepted the china cup from his grasp. She didn't meet his gaze all of the way. "Thank you," she said to the left corner of his mouth.

He paused, agonizing briefly on the best seating arrangement for this particular exchange. Should he sit boldly in front of her, pulling up a chair and not letting her escape his presence? Or should he play it safe and sit at her side, so she could avoid his stare at her leisure?

He decided to pull up one of the chairs that sat along the wall, and brought it right in front of her. He turned the chair backwards and sat open legged in it. He leaned over the wooden back. He noticed he was at a distance that was a little too intimate for acquaintances. But he didn't want to back up. He watched as she brought the cup close to her lips and blew softly. He liked how her pink lips scrunched up in a kissing shape to cool her coffee.

 _I'm being so creepy right now,_ he told himself sternly, but he couldn't rip his eyes from her. His emotions were percolating in his veins and he couldn't stop them. Luckily, she was so concentrated on her coffee that she didn't notice.

"How long have you worked here?" she asked her cup of coffee before taking a small sip.

"Not long. About a year." He reached over to take his coffee cup. He always took his black. He was a purist. "I actually dropped out of college," he added sheepishly.

Her eyes widened. She was finally looking at him. "Really? But I thought—"

"Yeah. Well. Shit happens," he followed up lamely. He took a gulp that was a little too large for his mouth. The caffeinated beverage burned a hole through his tongue. He grimaced as he set the cup down. That would teach him to be impatient. "I only went to make my mother happy. She wanted me to be a strait-laced, suck up businessman. Make lots of money and make the family proud, y'know? But that's not me." He chuckled softly. "I'm not corporate. At all. I mean, can you imagine me in a suit, all stiff and robotic?"

He lit up when she chuckled in response. "Robotic, yes. Corporate? Definitely not. And I guess you sealed your fate with those never-ending piercings." Her eyes slid down to his lips. She touched her own as she did it. The gesture made him feel endlessly conflicted, but a little turned on. He wasn't sure if she was doing it on purpose to tease him or if it was involuntary.

He touched his lip too. "What do you think?" he asked lightly despite his pounding heart. He could feel his palms turning into liquid half from anticipation and half from nervous energy.

A warm pink tint lit up her face. It made him smirk. "For me? I don't know, I like to think I'm pretty hardcore, but maybe not hardcore enough for a lip ring. Didn't it hurt? You must be a masochist," she answered as if she only had a few seconds to speak and she was hurrying to get the gist of her thoughts out.

"I guess I'm used to pain. Some might say I run to it."

She laughed in hushed tones. "You always were a bleeding heart." She paused for a beat. "I like it. The lip ring. On you, I mean. It looks good."

The compliment made him grin. "Thanks."

"So what brought you here?" She swept a hand over the tattoo parlor when her mouth touched the word, "here." Her shoulders, which were anchored stiffly almost to her ears, were starting to relax.

"Hmm. That's a long story. I don't know where to begin. Ah, to make a long story short… I dropped out because I wasn't doing so well in school. Not only that, but I hated my major. Business bores the hell out of me. I thought changing majors would help, but it didn't. No matter what I pursued that would fall in the category of "family approved majors," it would lead me to a predictable and boring nine to five. I didn't want to live such a bland life, so I dropped out.

"But I made a good friend in college named Yoshi. He was a punk, like me," he reminisced with a laugh. "I first met him when he was in the middle of a fist fight. He hit on some wannabe thug's girl or something. He got his ass kicked. It was a shame. Well, I was just passing through, and all of a sudden, the thugs thought I was with him or something. So I saved the poor sonofabitch and we've been friends ever since.

"Yoshi was working part-time at a tattoo parlor. I'd gotten plenty of piercings here actually," he added as he gestured to his ears. They were covered in all kinds of glinting silver rings and studs. "I needed a job once my parents cut me off. I hadn't followed directions like a good boy, so that financial support I was once getting was done. I suddenly had to figure out a better living situation, and I had to make some money.

"I didn't have any experience at all in that field. But there was an apprenticeship available for aspiring piercers. Yoshi practically forced the job on me. It was always supposed to be temporary. The plan was to make some money to support myself, and try to pursue school once again. But I couldn't do it. I was having too much fun here." At this point in the conversation, he allowed himself a happy smile. "I actually looked forward to coming in every day. And now here I am," he finished with a final sweeping gesture over himself. "I'm a piercer and an aspiring tattoo artist. I sketch tattoo ideas all of the time for other people, but none for myself," he laughed. He couldn't contain himself. When it came to his passion, he just got swept away in emotion. "It's funny that I want to be a tattoo artist, but I'm basically a tattoo virgin. I don't even have a trashy lower back tattoo," he grinned. "But I'll get inked up soon enough, no doubt. Then I'll be ruined. No good corporation will want me."

"What a mastermind," she murmured. Her low tone did something funny to his stomach. "Too bad long sleeved shirts are still a thing. Unless you plan on tatting up your whole body."

He looked up from his cup of coffee. "How did you know?" he joked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "I don't even know what I love enough to get inked on me, so it'll be a while until that happens. And I may not get clients for a while once I'm legit. So I'm sure I'll need to get at least a few visible tattoos.

"But I want to talk about you," he continued gently. "You're still in school right? How's that treating you?"

"Busy. Stressful. I still have a long road ahead of me. More schooling, passing the bar… all of that shit. But I love it. It's so interesting and it's something I really love." Her grin mirrored the one on his face earlier when he gushed about his job. "I get to argue professionally for a good cause. Can't get any better than that."

"It's funny. The former Yankee is cleaning her act up." He gave her a sideways smile. "What branch of law are you interested in?"

She beamed widely at him. "Juvenile delinquency. I want to help out misfits like me. Most of them are good kids in unfortunate circumstances. So if I can advocate for them, help them out and show them they're not alone… That's the best gift I could ask for." Her voice cracked on the last word. It was touching to see her emotion. She picked the best career path for herself. It was personal and meaningful for her.

"So everything worked out. I'm glad," he said warmly. He truly meant it. Everything he said was from his heart. He hoped she could hear his sincerity.

Uo smiled shyly at him. He could tell she loved the praise. She was glowing. "Thank you. It sounds like you're doing great too."

They locked eyes for a moment too long. It brought him back to their nights lying together. So silent, so still, but still so comfortable.

But then her face started to crumble, as though she were remembering something tragic from her past. "You're being so nice to me," she said in hushed tones.

He opened his eyes wide in shock. It was an unexpected twist to the conversation. "What do you mean?" he asked, though he knew.

"Come on, don't play dumb. You know." She paused. "I was a pretty big bitch to you before I went to college. We haven't even talked since then. But now you're being so buddy-buddy with me. Almost as if… we were real friends."

Her tone was wistful but also a bit deflated. He wanted to know the reason why. He leaned forward to catch her soft words. "We are friends, Uo," he said just as softly.

Uo brought her face closer to his. "Just friends?" she breathed.

The eye contact was too intense. He'd wanted to be platonic and gentle with her but she was bringing up past feelings that didn't feel so past anymore. He turned away and coughed. He decided to brush her question aside. He wasn't ready to unpack the answer for that loaded inquiry just yet. "I just didn't want to waste time being mad at you. Was I incredibly angry at first? Hell yeah I was. You completely tore me apart. You knew how I felt about you, and you ripped that apart. Those first few months without you were pure torture. It took me at least a year to make a breakthrough.

"But something a friend said to me started to make sense to me. You were trying to spare me. And I didn't understand that. Plus, I've been reading some books about Buddhism. There's entire chapters based on forgiveness for past mistakes and how you should extend compassion towards all. That helped me a bit I guess," he laughed.

She smiled, but it was steeped in embarrassment and a bit of sadness. "I wasn't very honest with you," she conceded as she avoided eye contact. "I thought I was being compassionate. But I hurt you. I'm

so sorry—"

He waved a hand over her apology. "Come on. It happened so long ago. Let's forgive and forget. It's what Buddha would do."

"You and Buddha," she giggled. She paused for a heartbeat before looking down at his lips again.

This time, he had to call her out on it. She kept looking there so often. "What, do I have something on my face? I mean, besides this beast right here," he asked huskily. Hatsuharu touched his lower lip, right by his new lip ring.

Bewildered, she snatched her gaze away from his mouth to make eye contact. "What?" she squawked, turning red.

"You've been staring at my mouth far too many times to count," he teased. Making Uo squirm was starting to become his favorite activity. He licked his lips slowly to get a reaction from her. She wiggled uncomfortably in her chair. "Mmm, did I get it?" he asked sultrily.

She said it under her breath, but he caught the, "Fuck," she swore as she stuck her hands between her knees. _What are you thinking, Uo?_ he asked her in his head with an impish gleam in his eyes.

It looked like she was going to give him an honest answer, because her eyes flashed guiltily. She looked like a kid who was about to confess to eating all of the cookies. "I was just wondering how you do it," she mumbled.

"Hm?"

"How do you… you know… make out with that thing on your lip? I still like it," she rambled. "Just wondering how you do it. Ahahaha… Don't mind me. I'm just thinking out loud."

He couldn't pass this moment up. "Wanna find out?" he asked. He leaned in even closer. They were almost at kissing distance now. One small move forward and their lips would definitely touch.

Hatsuharu was surprised when she didn't move away. She was turning so many shades of red and pink, he could've sworn she was some strange blushing chameleon. It had been a while since he'd seen her face this close. It was weird, but good. It was like he was discovering her again. Eyes, nose, lips, cheeks. Everything was familiar but new.

Uo parted her lips slightly as her eyelids fell heavily over blue eyes. She was so open for him, so relaxed. He could've taken advantage of her lost guard, but he didn't want to be a jerk.

Correction. He wanted to. He wanted to take advantage. But he knew his place. It was time to end it. His heart raced as he backed away and gave her a goofy grin. "Hahaha. Just kidding," he lied. He raked his fingers through his shaggy hair. "Don't let me get away with that again. I might take it too far." He scooted his chair back and plopped down for good measure. They were a friendly distance away. This was how it should be. No messy feelings and heavy flirtation. It wasn't supposed to be anything more than a casual catching up. He had to stay in his lane.

Uo placed her hand over her heart. "I….," she started, but then thought against it. Instead, she laughed breathlessly. "You got me there. Haha. Guess I deserved it." But even through her joking and light tone, she looked almost disappointed.

"I haven't been making out with anyone lately, so I wouldn't know," he remarked wistfully as he touched his lip ring. "Maybe this guy scares the ladies off or something. But how about you?" He was itching to get out of the hot seat, so he turned the tables on the blushing blonde. "Any American boyfriends out there in New York City?"

Uo chomped on her lip. It flushed bright pink. "I didn't have much time to date," she confessed, blushing. "Law school is crazy. Everyone is so stressed, and trying to one-up each other. It's such a rat race. But I did go on a blind date recently. My friend set us up."

"But nothing came of it?"

"….No. It was… It just didn't work out."

He didn't want to press the issue, but he was still a little curious (and a little jealous, if he could be totally honest). "So nothing huh. Why not?"

She looked like she wanted to be anywhere but here, under this rapid fire inquisition. "Ah, sorry," he apologized with a blush. "You don't have to go into it if you don't want to. I get it. It's… personal."

Uo smoothed her hair over her shoulder. It shone under the soft lights. He wanted to stroke it with his fingers, but he knew that would be strange, to put it mildly. She was bringing out all of his inner creeper thoughts. She examined her ends. "He didn't…."

She caught his interest. He perked up. "He didn't….?" he repeated slowly.

Finally she showed him her open and honest expression. It was no holds barred, full of longing and passion. "He didn't make me feel like you did."

He didn't know what to say to that. She stood up while he was paralyzed with shock. She made her way to one of the reclining chairs for customers and splayed herself over it.

Hatsuharu turned to look at her, confused. She'd dropped a bombshell on him, and now she was walking away. He didn't know what to say.

She finally sat up. "Come here," she called to him. Like a puppy eager to please, he obeyed.

She leaned back, this time pulling up her shirt slightly. He was transfixed by her pale white skin, and how cute her bellybutton was. He felt himself flush crimson when she loosened the ribbons by her neck. The tails fluttered open, exposing collarbones and a slight bit of cleavage.

He could hardly believe it, but there she was, offering herself to him like a virgin sacrifice. The wordless gesture was there. She didn't have to say anything. It was all implied.

 _We can't have sex at my job, we can't have sex at my job, we can't have sex at my job,_ he thought. This wasn't the time to fall into old patterns. That part of their lives was done. They weren't the same people they were three years ago.

"U—Uo, w—we can't do this," he sputtered. _As tempting as it is,_ he said to himself, but he didn't think she needed to hear that perverted sentiment. He cared about not jeopardizing his job, but more than that, he just wanted to talk to her. They were getting to know each other all over again, and he didn't want to taint that.

She raised a cocky eyebrow at him. "Why not?" she pressed.

"Dammit," he cursed under his breath. He clenched his fists so hard, his nails created little crescents in his palms. He worked on squeezing and releasing his fists, along with taking a discreet deep breath. It didn't help. She still looked so good.

His mind raced, trying to pluck out the most reasonable explanation. But nothing came, except the most cliché one. "It's not right," he finished lamely. "It's disrespectful to you. I don't want to…" He racked his brain for the right word. "I don't want to take advantage," he finally said.

It was her turn to smirk. "It's disrespectful to pierce a customer's belly button?"

The words rushed at him, but he couldn't quite understand. "What?" he asked weakly.

To his surprise, Uo laughed long and hard. She even made a show of holding her bare stomach and bending at the waist to laugh in the direction of her thighs. "Ahahahahaha, what did you think I meant?" she asked with a knowing gleam in her cerulean eyes. "Pervert," she teased.

It was his turn to laugh a little. "You got me," he admitted sheepishly. "I must have a dirty mind. I'm sorry. But are you serious?" he asked. "I don't know if you know this, but the shop is closed."

She smiled back at him. "Will you make an exception for an old friend?"

"Emphasis on old?" he joked, which earned him a much deserved whack on the arm.

"I'm serious," she answered as she leaned back, her flat stomach even more taut. "I've always wanted a piercing but now that I'm going to be a lawyer, I can't get anything too obvious. I need something hidden. Why not a belly ring? Might be fun," she said lightly as though she were talking about a day at the beach instead of a painful piercing.

"You're crazy," he laughed. "Don't think I'm giving this away for free. And I expect a good tip." But he turned away to make the preparations. She wasn't backing down and neither was he.

He turned around, this time with hands safely equipped with black latex gloves. He came over to her with a tray full of glistening, freshly sterilized needles. He could make out the nervous gulp making its way down her slim, pale throat. He was surprised that she was so apprehensive.

He froze. "You're not joking with me again, are you?" he pressed, all seriousness as he set down the tray of needles on the small metal table by her side. He peered into her face for any traces of impish grins or twinkling eyes. But all he saw was a nervous but determined Uo. "I take my job very seriously. If this is a prank, better stop it now. I don't pierce without consent you know. You're either all in with me or all out."

They looked at each other silently for a few moments. The air practically buzzed with tension.

"How can you be nervous about getting a piercing when you were a rough and tough Yankee thug?" he wondered aloud with an amused half-smirk.

Some color rushed to her cheeks. "I—I don't know," she sputtered defensively. "It's a new experience."

He let her words settle in the air between them. The silence made her even more self-conscious. She ripped her eyes away. She touched her neck, a gesture meant to guard herself.

"If it's scary, you can back out now," he said gently.

"I think scary things can be the most rewarding." She gave him a piercing stare, more convinced and sure this time. "Don't you?"

He opened his mouth to speak but it was hard to get the words to roll off his tongue. He had no choice but to snap it shut. Hatsuharu sighed.

"You're determined, huh." He reached his gloved hand out. In a trancelike state, he found the side of her abdomen. He could only see her there, lying there exposed for him, so open and honest. It was different and more than a little scary. But it felt refreshing. It felt honest and real. This was the breakthrough he'd been looking for so long ago.

He'd seen her naked so many times, but rarely did she let him see this side of her. Her naked heart and soul, everything so bare. All of her emotions, no matter how conflicting and imperfect.

He wanted more of this side. So soft and vulnerable. Uo was always so tough and fiery. She didn't need anyone, or so she would tell everyone, even herself. He knew Kureno changed her. She'd let him in and it didn't work out. He knew better than anyone how badly that type of heartbreak was.

He had questions for her, and he sensed she wouldn't run from them. But something prevented him from speaking his mind. He wanted his body to talk to her. He ran his hand from the top of her exposed ribcage all the way down to her hip, just above the waistband of her jeans.

 _Wait…,_ a voice told him. _I can't. This can't happen._

He jerked his hand away as if she were molten lava. "Shit. I'm sorry, Uo." His insides felt all creepy crawly. He never wanted to be "that guy," that weird, creepy bastard that took advantage of women's weaknesses at every turn. From the moment she requested the piercing, their relationship had to change to suit the environment. They had to be "client" and "piercer," and he'd forgotten that. He was invested far too much in her life and feelings to treat her so clinically.

"I shouldn't have done that," he continued. "I'm so sorry. That was out of line. Not very professional at all. And just so you know… I don't make passes at clients like that. Ever." He was rambling and he knew it. It was so mortifying. The room felt so heavy and hot. He swiped at his brow in what he hoped was a casual gesture. When he pulled his hand towards his line of sight for further inspection, he saw big globs of perspiration. He grimaced. Now he just looked like a liar liar pants on fire with all the heavy sweating and rambling.

He expected her to pull her shirt down and hop out of the chair. He wouldn't have blamed her. She asked for a service and here he was, stroking her stomach. It was weird at best and downright creepy at worst. And it was leaning towards the "worst" side.

But she didn't. Her cheeks were tinted pink, and she looked a little bewildered, but she made no moves to cover herself. She even traced his earlier gloved path down her stomach. "It's fine," she assured him softly.

"No. Not fine. We're not… like that. I got out of line." He sat down in a nearby chair and threw his head in his hands. His heartbeat hummed in his chest. "Can I have a do-over with you?"

He looked up just in time to see her bite on her fingers, a nervous habit he was all too familiar with. "There are no takebacks in life, Haru. You know this," she answered in a voice just above a whisper.

"I know. I was really out of line. Dammit. I swear I can be professional about this. You just… shook me up. I'm just remembering so much about you. But I'm in the right mindset to do this… if you're still interested." He cracked a smile at her to ease the tension. "I'd be honored to pierce you. But only if you're ready."

She peered back at him. "Are you ready?" she challenged him.

Hatsuharu took a deep breath and released it. "Yeah, I'm ready."

Uo tied her hair up into a ponytail. She leaned back once more for him. "Then show me what you got."

Hatsuharu walked once more to the sink, removed his gloves, and washed his hands thoroughly. He felt his client-ready persona slide into place. He'd adopted some of his early White Haru stoicism, mixed with a bit of charm and friendliness, in order to put his customers at ease. He had to show her that he was a professional. He wasn't the same fumbling, struggling young kid he once was.

Once he pulled some new gloves on and spun around, it was as if he was a new person. "First time?" he asked cheerfully as he approached her.

Uo played along with him. "Yeah. I'm a little nervous," she admitted.

"Don't worry. It'll be over before you know it." He turned to his array of needles. "Don't get too freaked out now," he said in soothing tones as he reached for a sealed packet of disinfectant wipes. "I'm going to sterilize the area. It's just going to feel a little cold, that's all. After this, I'm going to make some markings for where the piercing will go. You'll get to look in the mirror to make sure you feel it's straight. Sound good?"

Uo nodded. "Thanks, Haru," she whispered, looking up at the ceiling.

He'd done this procedure so many times with so many clients. And while Uo was a special case for him, he set those feelings aside for now to focus on the task at hand. He made light conversation with her, which she responded to in turn. At each step, he explained what he was about to do so that he could make her feel comfortable. Her tense muscles softened and she was even laughing with him.

"Now, you're going to feel the needle," he warned her as he picked up a particularly long, scary one. It glinted under the soft lighting. "Count to three with me, take a deep breath, and blow it out. It should help with the pain. Ready?"

"Yes." Uo attempted to look down at her belly button.

"You're brave," he remarked. "Most people don't want to look."

"I trust you. But I want to see for myself."

"I don't blame you. Ready to count?" At the same time, they murmured the countdown. "3...2…1."

"Breathe in deeply," he instructed. She followed his command perfectly. "And now."

As she breathed out, he inserted the needle. Uo hissed and clenched her fists, but she took it like a champ. Once he removed the needle, he inserted a silver studded piercing in her belly button.

"It's done," he announced proudly. Hatsuharu turned to dispose of his gloves. He washed his hands again (couldn't be too careful), and put on yet another pair of gloves. "Wanna see?" he grinned.

The look on Uo's face was priceless. She was so nervous and a little unsure before. Now she just looked like she'd experienced a huge rush. She was glowing.

He picked up a hand mirror to give her a better view. He positioned it right below the new piercing. "What do you think?" he asked expectantly. "Everyone heals differently, but it should heal in a couple of months."

"I love it," she gushed.

"You're going to love shopping for new rings and jewelry. Lots of cute stuff to choose from. Once you're all healed, the world is your oyster," he assured her as he helped her up.

Hatsuharu ran through the usual new piercing aftercare routine as he brought her to the register. He gestured to the glass case of pretty studs and dangly jewelry for her to peruse. She decided on a crystal butterfly with some pink gems dangling at the ends. It was a surprisingly girly choice for her.

"Didn't pin you down as a butterfly type of girl. It's so delicate," he snickered.

"I can be girly," she insisted with a huff. Her defensiveness made him laugh.

Hatsuharu suggested some products to ease the pain and keep the piercing disinfected and clean. He was the master of aftercare, or so he liked to think. Uo ended up purchasing the butterfly belly jewelry, some saline solution, some bandages, and the piercing. Uo gave him a hearty tip despite his protests.

"You're a great piercer, Haru. You know what you're doing, you're good at it, and you love it," she told him softly. "I can tell that you were meant for this." She grinned. "And when you become a tattoo artist, I'd like to be your first customer."

"How are you feeling?" he asked gently, gesturing in the direction of her stomach.

"You know what? It didn't hurt as badly as I thought it would."

"Really? Because you sure were scowling a lot."

"Idiot," she snickered as she playfully swatted his bicep. "Go easy on me, will ya?"

"Never," he fired back, eyes mischievously gleaming. "You weren't very easy on me. You deserve it."

He handed back Uo's credit card. The transaction was over. He'd say something cliché and general like, "It was good seeing you, Uo. We should hang out sometime." And she would smile politely and follow up with, "Yeah, let's do it." But they wouldn't. She would go back to America to finish college and he would be firmly rooted in Japan. It was always their path, to be these floating apparitions in the corner of each other's eyes. Barely noticeable, just passing through.

His hand lingered a beat too long in hers. He blushed. He knew he should've pulled away. He was going to pull away. But as he did, her slim, cold fingers found his and clenched down firmly.

Surprised, he looked up. "Uo-chan?" he called softly.

"Is this goodbye?"

The question caught him off guard. "What?"

Some hair escaped her ponytail. With a sweep of her hand, she slipped her hair tie off of the platinum strands and let it fan over her face. She quickly smoothed it away with her free hand, but a lock of hair rested in its usual spot over her left eye.

Hatsuharu couldn't help but smirk. "Well aren't you dramatic?" he joked even though his heart was hammering in his chest. He pressed the card into her hand, urging her to take it. But she wouldn't do it. She made their palms kiss even harder instead. The credit card was starting to form a rectangular film of sweat between them.

Finally, the slippery plastic fell from their hands and clattered to the counter. Neither of them noticed.

"Can I ask you something?"

She smiled. "Anything."

"Why did you push me away so many times?" As soon as the words died on his lips, he couldn't help but smirk darkly. "Why am I asking such a stupid question. You weren't in love with me. Simple as that."

"…I wasn't in love with you. At first. Not the way you were in love with me. It was so scary for me. Your emotions were so intense. They washed over me so powerfully. I didn't feel confident that I could return those feelings. That's what I told myself.

"When we last saw each other, I was determined to end it. It was always supposed to be light and fun. I was attracted to you. There was something about you that I liked. We were so much alike. But I couldn't love you like you needed to be loved. I was scared, and I know that's so cliché and lame to say. But it's the truth. I didn't want to get hurt again, Haru," she said brokenly. "Kureno-kun already hurt me so badly. If I fell for you, it would be trouble. But…"

"But…?"

"It was too late. It was a mistake. Leaving you in that apartment where we made so many memories together, dropping that bombshell on you… it was wrong. I thought I could let you go with that plan. But it didn't work. I didn't want to admit it. Hell, I never wanted to admit it. Haru… I was already in love with you."

Those words. The ones he wanted to hear from her lips for so long. They sounded like angels singing and children playing, all of the most treasured and cherished sounds in the world.

"What was that? I didn't hear you."

Her face dropped. "Were you even paying attention? You weren't, were you," she accused him with another slap to his arm. "You just want to make me suffer don't you. I'll say it again a million times if I have to. I was in love with you then and I'm in love with you now. I love you, Haru."

He turned to hide his goofy smile. The woman he couldn't stop thinking about was in love with him too.

And she was leaning in closer and closer. He could smell her jasmine perfume. She puckered her lips and looked at him longingly from beneath her lashes.

But he was feeling playful. He grabbed her head and stopped her before she made contact with his lips.

Uo's eyes fluttered open. Bewilderment ran through her face as she looked at him wide-eyed. "Haru?"

He raised his eyebrow at her. "Oh, don't think you're gonna get to me so easily."

"What?"

"Heh. What, you think you can just strut in here after three years and just have me eating out of the palm of your hand just like that? Do I look that easy to you?" Hatsuharu lifted his chin and looked down at her with sparkling eyes. The left side of his mouth slid up his face, revealing a deep dimple. "You gotta try harder than that, Miss. Lawyer."

He liked how her cheeks grew warmer and warmer under his touch. "What, are you playing hard to get or something?" she joked.

"Oh, yes. After all the hell you put me through, I think I deserve to play a little hard to get."

"That's not very Buddhist of you."

"Even Buddha was petty at times, I'm sure."

Uo's laugh rang through the empty tattoo parlor. "You're the worst," she told him.

He leaned in just a hair closer. He made sure to let his warm breath coat her lips. He wanted to taste them right then, but he liked making her wait. He searched her expression. No more secrets and veils. No more walls of defenses or spiraling towers meant to keep him away from her emotions. She didn't have to say anything. He saw it all. She was being real with him. She regretted leaving. She wanted to have him, and not just for lonely nights or drunken hookups. She wanted everything. The good and bad. The exciting and the mundane. Coupledom. Love. Affection. A relationship that wasn't in the dark.

He wanted it too.

He brushed her lips lightly with his thumb. It made them part slightly. She needed this. A kiss to seal the deal. Seal their fate. To stamp their relationship.

"I won't kiss you," he breathed against her lips, making her shiver. "I want to go slowly with you."

And with that he pulled away and handed Uo back her card, seemingly unfazed. She blinked twice in his direction. Uo was dazed and confused, but she took her card back with shaky fingers and slipped it back into her wallet.

"I probably deserve it," she smiled darkly. "I wasn't very good to you."

"Hmm. Crocodile tears don't work on me, Uo-chan. Try harder," he grinned.

"How?" she pressed him. "I'm telling the truth."

He raised his eyebrow again. "How can I be sure? You've strung me along so many times. Broke my poor little heart, you know."

"Arghhhh. I can't win with you," she groaned, but she was still amused. "How can I win with you? I don't know how to play the game you're playing with me."

"Sure you do." He paused. "You start by courting me."

The response made her do a double take. "What?"

He could barely suppress his chuckles. "You have to court me. I want a date. A real date. All showy and romantic. Flowers and all. Expensive dinner too. What do you say?" He was all seriousness now. The amusement left his eyes and his face was set in a determined expression. "Why don't we try dating?"

Uo's half-smile made him melt. "This is pretty backwards you know."

"Hey, just because we've done everything physically doesn't mean we've done it emotionally. Well, what do you say? Do you want to go out sometime, Uo-chan?"

She closed her eyes and smiled. When she opened them, they were glossy with grateful, happy tears.

"Yes."


End file.
